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  1. #1

    Feeling like a failure, disappointing your partner

    Will it ever go away?
    Last edited by Sugar28; October 28th, 2012 at 11:30 PM.

  2. #2
    Moderator
    ELP's Avatar
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    Oh hun you sound so sad atm It will get better I promise you. Every day you fall more and more in love with DD2 and all the expectations from pregnancy fade away. Either one of your DD's could well become your DH little sidekick, they are still so young atm which makes all children this age mummys by default. If there is an option in the future for another chance of a DS then thats great, but youll also see by then that Daddy will be so in love with his ladies that it will take the pressure off xxxxx

  3. #3
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    coocoobananas's Avatar
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    I wanted to stay team green for your same initial reasons but caved! Now I am dealing with having my 3rd boy and not getting to see his face to help me bond! I'm not sure which is worse!
    After my 2nd boy, the feelings did pass but the longing for a girl remained, but it wasn't nearly as intense. You have a lot of hormones probably raging and that guilt that you need not feel. It's not your fault that you had another girl. Do what I'm doing now-blame dh! I think time will heal and having dh on board for another possibly in the future should shine some light on the situation. But it is hard, I get it! Vent away
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    Had my first and only little girl Emmerson oct 19,2014 right on her due date!
    Hoping I stop calling her 'little dude, bud' and him real soon

  4. #4
    I can so well identify with you...I felt like a big failure...I think I can never get whatever I want ...I should stop wishing for anything...as I do get lucky if I don't wish for something too bad. I also sometimes feel that I couldn't give a son to my partner n the family...who knows what happened but I do blame myself all the time.

  5. #5
    Quote Originally Posted by Sugar28 View Post
    Will it ever go away?
    I have 3 precious girls and I feel the same way you do..

    I am pregnant with baby#4. I am dreading about the gender as I am never lucky enough to get what I want
    - Jan 2002 Mar 2004 Jan 2007 - Apr 2008 Apr 2011

    Waiting for a for 9 long years

  6. #6
    I totally identify with your feelings, too. Even though I know it is the man's sperm that determines the gender, and our eggs only contain X chromosomes, I still feel like I failed to give my husband a son. It breaks my heart to see him sad, and that he feels like it is his fault. He loves our daughter SO MUCH, and he will love this little girl too, but I can see there is a sadness and a hole in his heart because he feels like he failed and can't make a boy.

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