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February 14th, 2014, 08:49 AM #1Dream Newbie
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- Feb 2014
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February 14th, 2014, 09:09 AM #2Dream Vet
- Join Date
- Jan 2014
- Location
- Canberra, Australia
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- 1,574
Oh Hun, don't be too hard on yourself. When you have your heart set on something, a dream, and it doesn't turn out the way you had planned, it's natural to be upset. I have 6 boys and when we went to our scan with "number 3" I was certain it was a girl. Instead we found out we were having twin boys! I thought it was some cruel joke. I cried and was devastated. And then the same with number 5, in fact I went home and bawled! By the time we had our last baby, i just laughed. It was so unbelievable to think we could have 6 boys!!
I know it's hard now, and it doesn't make you a bad person or bad mum, you've had a dream crushed. But once you start getting kicked in the ribs and seeing those little hands press up against your tummy, and then hold that little man, you are bound to fall in love with him.
And little boys are gorgeous. They're cuddly, fun and affectionate and love their mummy.
I do know how you feel, as I'm sure many other women on here do too, don't feel bad or angry at yourself. It's understandable.
Thinking of you and here's to a healthy pregnancy and beautiful baby boy. xxMum of 9 boys & my stillborn angel daughter, Shaylah Anne 20/02/2015
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February 14th, 2014, 06:13 PM #3
Fake it til you make it....it gets easier in time! We promise.
Will you have more children? Consider swaying?
My Gender Dreaming
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February 15th, 2014, 12:25 AM #4
I'm quite sure that hormones play a big role in some of the reactions women have in such situations. It's not entirely uncommon to feel it much stronger than you anticipated or really need time to digest the information before you can even something close to acceptance.
Try to be gentle with yourself. You had an idea, a vision of how things might be and how you feel about it and even down to what you would do with a little girl. And now you aren't getting all those things. It is totally a form of grief. Not over the person you are getting, but the one you aren't. Allow yourself some time to deal with those feelings and you might be surprised how you come around in a few days/weeks.
I wouldn't force yourself to go do something you might not be ready for. The stroller can wait. You don't need to push yourself to do things right away. It might take a while of faking that smile. But do allow yourself a day or two of downtime to digest and come up with some new visions for your little baby. Soon enough, you won't know what you will do without himA: "Owner" of the following brood:
-Our biggest surprise dude (L: 2009)
-Our rainbow little man (K: 2011)
-Our sway and pray little diva (J: 2013)
-Our lucky charm guy (S: 2015)
We may be done, we may come back for one more sway. Time will tell. At the moment, we are very content with our family!
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February 15th, 2014, 04:45 PM #5
I felt the same way when I found out my first was a boy. In a way you are grieving the death of the daughter you dreamed of. I'm sure you will love this little boy once he's born, but right now it can be hard to get passed your gender disappointment.
2010
2012
2015--home water birth VBA2C!!
praying for one last
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