How much weight should I realistically lose?

[Hex]

I have been dieting now for 2 weeks and have lost almost 4 lbs and I'd like to ttc in January, but I was reading that the target bmi for ttc a girl should be between 18.5-20. I have never in my life had a bmi of 20 and even at my lowest conception weight my bmi was 26 which is still considered overweight. Right now it is 31 (obese). My lowest adult weight was 134 lbs and my bmi was STILL technically overweight. I just don't think it's realistic for me to drop 2 bmi classes and enter the low end of a range I have never been able to be in in my life even through bouts of disordered eating and compulsive dieting.
Am I hopeless? Should I just aim for my personal lowest adult weight? By January, I think it's realistic to expect a maximum weight loss of 20-25 lbs and that would put me pretty much AT the weight I conceived both of my boys at. Sure, I will probably start dropping weight a bit quicker when I start doing the cardio BUT at this point I'm just kind of concerned that the weight loss is only going to improve my maternal condition and not the other way around. Should I even bother dropping weight at all or am I just not the target demographic for this whole thing? Maybe I'm just fat enough right now to have a girl anyway haha!
I mean, I can still achieve a decline in maternal condition even if I drop from obese to overweight or normal right? Especially eating a relatively low nutrient diet, keeping blood glucose levels low, and doing the cardio?

[atomic sagebrush]

The target isn't necessarily 18.5-21, that is the "absolute barest minimum" and the "point at which to stop trying to lose weight" It is totally possible to get a girl out of that target range. Mine was 21.1.

I do not want you to try to get down that far, that would require something insane and impractical and could mess with your mind if you've had disordered eating before. Avoid at all costs.

Whether or not to lose weight for gals who are more than a little heavy is one of those things that I honestly do not have the answer to. I do think that some women get girls at higher weights, we know it to be true because we've seen it. But I don't honestly know if it's because they were heavy or if it was because so many women lose a bunch of weight before pregnancy or both. Additionally, from a practical aspect, I just can't rely on it as a sway tactic, you know?? I can tell people "lose some weight" but I can't really tell people "gain 50 lbs" when I don't even know it will work. So it could possibly make some sense for you to stay where you are but I can't totally sign off on it because I just don't have the data to be able to do that.

My inclination is for you to try and lose some weight not necessarily for swaying (even though it will very likely help) but because it may help increase your chances of a healthy pregnancy. I would have you do one of the alternate diets and cardio and see how it goes.

[Hex]

Ok thank! I have zero intention of going back to anything even approaching disordered eating. That was a different me entirely. I think what I'm going to do is still keep protein limited, limit meat, limit fat, kee nutrients on the low end and limit calories so I am slowly losing weight at about 1-2 lbs per week and then Start the cardio the first or second week in September. Maintain my eating except maybe add a bit more calories I should drop weight a bit more quickly with the cardio. I should mention that even at my lowest weight I was weightlifting and had some decently defined muscle so I may have not been overweight as far as body fat but I was according to bmi. I will be avoiding all muscle building exercise. My muscles from before are a distant memory lol I have high hopes that the cardio will sway for me as well as trying to stay stress free and dropping some weight. I was definitely losing weight before I conceived both of my boys but I don't recall if I was actively losing during the month of conception. I will try to continue to lose while ttcing at a healthy conservative rate