Confused re abstain / FR...

[honeybee37]

The title says it all really. I've read hat neither are getting great results so I don't know which to do. dH had a fairly low sex drive anyway so FR would be a challenge. He would easily abstain from AF to day 12 when we were planning the attempt. Does that sound ok? Ds2 was from one attempt (hours before ovulation, as it happened) whereas DS1 we probably had 3-4 attempts in the fertile period. I'm not sure how ds2 was a boy, actually as I was breastfeeding and v skinny at the time too! (Though I wouldn't swap him at all!)

[maidentomother]

I wouldn't do that long of an abstain if possible, it's bad for sperm and lowers odds of conception without swaying pink much if at all. I'd do 4 days max, but regular release on his own all cycle long is best.

[honeybee37]

Ah ok - thanks. He's said he won't do that. I don't know why - I think he feels embarrassed about it and self conscious. He claims he never does, ha ha!! But like I said he doesn't have a high sex drive which I hoped would've swayed punk but it doesn't seem to have in the past!

[maidentomother]

You could BD every 4 days with a condom or pulling out, or evrn every 6 days if 4 days is too often.

[atomic sagebrush]

You don't have to do either, you can have him release on his own, or with you, with a condom, every 2-4 days thru the cycle and then keep the one attempt.

Swaying is like an iceberg, the stuff we can see and control is miniscule compared to the stuff under the water out of sight and beyond our control.

I got a boy and a girl while breastfeeding, but three boys without - I do think it helps even tho not 100%