wondfo opks

[djmommy]

I'll see what the next week brings. I mean I cant.imagine I ovulated! I just want to be pregnant already!!!!

[djmommy]

I still have light brown spotting. Cd 8 and today is cd 9 had brown cm?
Normal?

[atomic sagebrush]

It's not unusual. As ovulation approaches you make EWCM that can combine with any leftover old blood and make a little leftover look like a LOT, and/or the cervix gets softer and more easiy injured so a tiny owie you'd never notice otherwise can combine with the EWCM and again, make a small amount of blood seem like more.

[djmommy]

ok thanks!!!

[djmommy]

so strange that I have light spotting again today. I have never had it this long. its light pink.
We did hace sex last night but I have never spotted after that before.

[djmommy]

tmi today
20190114_110150.jpg

[atomic sagebrush]

Hmm yes that is pretty peculiar, more heavy than I'd expect for leftovers.

Have you ever been checked for cervical erosion?

[djmommy]

no what's that?
Ugh I just want to cry!!!
At this rate ill never get pregnant.it has not been like that anymore yet today but seriously!!

[djmommy]

so of course I googled it and it dies seem rather harmless but I wonder if my estrogen is too.high, although I havent had much ewcm.
I feel like such a mess. I will be 43 Thursday and I just want to have one last baby. I know how blessed I am to have 4 amazing and healthy children. I just adore them so. I.dont even really have a gender preference. My 3 DS is the best little guy and I couldnt imagine life without him. I would gladly take more lol
I mean we arent trying well DH isnt but we are having unprotected sex praying for a miracle. I just dont know anymore. Am I being wrong but praying for it. I mean I'm not forcing him.

[atomic sagebrush]

It is, it's pretty harmless and not a big deal but it can cause some bleeding like that.

My thinking is this: any guy who shows up to have unprotected sex in a committed marital relationship knows what he is getting into and it is ok for us to hope and pray for an oopsie. I do not know what the future holds for you but I think that for some of us, the hoping and praying can eventually transition into us being ok either way. For some of us, that "I still hope this happens one more time" can be a little bit of something to lean on while we work on getting our hearts and heads right in case it doesn't. As long as you don't let that hope and prayer turn into something that takes over your whole life, it is not only fine but even emotionally beneficial to have the dream to lean on.

Of course we are all hoping that we will be celebrating a BFP soon - if you need to keep hoping and praying then keep right on doing that and we are right here if you need us.