Need Advice!

[MommaNeedsPink]

This is kind of long so bear with me please! I have 3 boys.. my youngest is 10 months old and was conceived after 4 failed transfers of 6 girl embryos. Actually when we did PGD we ended up with 6 normal girls and only 1 normal boy so at least we know my DH makes girls now! We want to TTC our very last chance at a girl. I am still breastfeeding and have lost about 5lbs this month due to going to Disney and randomly not being a fan of breakfast/ having a decreased appetite. I want to follow the Chinese gender chart simply because it was correct for all my boys (even though I know there’s probably no truth to it being accurate). For a girl I would need to conceive in June, August, November or December. I have a feeling my breast milk would be dried up by August though since DS seems less interested in it every day. (He currently has formula along with the breastfeeding). So I’m trying to decide if we should go for it for June even though I haven’t technically been on the diet or 6 days/week exercising. All my sons were conceived with FR so was planning on abstaining 12 days. I know there’s a good chance we may not conceive the first month anyway. For what it’s worth, I conceived my 2nd DS after 18 months and my 3rd with a gap of 4 years, so we have never conceived super close together. So basically, do you think breastfeeding and losing 5lbs would have enough of an effect to make not having 12 weeks on diet worth it?

[atomic sagebrush]

Hi!

Yes the Chinese Calendar is bogus - if the Chinese really had access to some ancient wisdom that could predict gender, there would not be orphanages full of unwanted Chinese baby girls. We have done tons of polls and surveys on it and it is always 50-50 every time.

I cannot ever recommend anyone pass up time on diet trying to match the Chinese Gender Calendar. Even losing 5 lbs and breastfeeding, the time on diet has been significant. Weight loss and breastfeeding have not been anywhere near as reliable as the time on diet.

How old is your husband?

How many attempts did you have with your boys? (by that I mean unprotected sex)

While it's totally possible that you won't get pregnant the first month, I have had several people who assumed based on their past history that they wouldn't get pregnant easily and altered/rushed their sway accordingly, only to end up conceiving the first month and having huge regrets bout that. Time on diet of at least 6 weeks and more like 8+ has been sooo much better I have to urge everyone to go that route if you can stand it.

If you realy have to try that is always up to you, just be sure you have only one attempt unprotected in the fertile window.

[MommaNeedsPink]

That makes sense! Thank you for your reply.

My husband is 29. With my first we had many attempts, 2nd was an oops and 3rd was 1 attempt the day before positive OPK. I do want my best chance at a girl so I will wait and not chance it since this is definitely our last. I’m trying to be honest with myself though and I’m not entirely sure I can handle the diet and exercise for more than a month or two. I’m going to give it my best shot though!

Would walking on the treadmill with the baby in a carrier be too much weight and add muscle? That is the only realistic way I could get the cardio in. Since I only truly started the diet yesterday, would you say have 12 weeks from now be our first attempt? Or would 8 weeks still be a good chance? Also, would you recommend starting DH on any supplements? Sorry for so many questions! I’m trying to get it right this time

[atomic sagebrush]

Ok, so he can do abstain, that's fine. Do one attempt to start with as one attempt has been pink-friendly.

Many times people who are worried about the diet have a complete misconception of what the LE Diet even is. It's meant to be easy to stick to, so when you have a chance give me a brief rundown of what you think the LE Diet is about and I suspect it's far more restrictive than it really is.

Walking on the treadmill with baby is fine. There's really no way to add muscle if you're on the LE Diet and have lost at least a little weight.

Anything longer than 6 weeks got acceptable results and the longer the better, up to 12 weeks where it seems to max out. So yes 8 weeks is still good.

Most of the supplements recommended for DH have not worked and we've moved away from them. You may want to give him Olive Leaf Extract 500-1000 mg starting right away and going on through BFP at which point he can gradually wean off them. And soy milk 12-48 oz started right away and go to BFP, but he can just drop that.

[MommaNeedsPink]

So the way I understand it is you can eat mostly what you want as long as you stay within the calorie protein etc. limits. I have thought about attempting to just go vegetarian (does that get as good of results?) but other than salads and pasta I don’t know what I would eat for meals. I tried the diet (half heartedly.. I was just ready for any baby at that point) for a couple weeks before TTC DS3 and I was usually over on protein so eventually just gave up. I will admit though I didn’t really give it a real chance! We are kind of a meat and potatoes family, and that’s the way I was raised as well (probably why I have boys lol). So I think the biggest thing for me is that meat and eggs should be avoided. The other thing is cutting out the fast food and snacking. I’ve never been a big meal eater and tend to snack throughout the day and eat small meals. I do see that I have had a pretty boy friendly diet and it makes sense to me that the girl diet is pretty much opposite of what I usually do so I can see why it could make a difference. It is definitely worth an honest shot!

[atomic sagebrush]

Yes that's right. No magic or forbidden foods, just stick within the limits for the day on cals, protein, and fat.

Unfortunately I don't have as much confidence in vegetarian diets. (I will ALWAYS have you guys do the easiest option that still sways; when I don't, it means that I have less faith in the easiest option!)

You do not need to avoid meat and especially not eggs. All foods are fine within limits. Now, there are reasons why many people limit meat and it's because when eating meat, you quickly go over on protein and have eaten barely any calories which really cuts down the amount you can eat the rest of the day (since grains, dairy, legumes, nuts all have protein). It makes it easier to stick to diet without going much in for meat but it isn't banned, it's ok.

The important thing is to do different than when you got your boys. So if you were eating 6 times a day and now you're eating 4 times a day, that is still gonna sway pink. I tend to recommend 2 or 3 meals (whichever works for you) but when people can't stick to 3, I have them go to 4 or even 5 while keeping in limits of the day otherwise.

[MommaNeedsPink]

Thank you! That actually makes me feel a lot better about it. So if I try to eat something other than meat/protein until family dinner then I would be making a pretty big change compared to what my body is used to and that is basically what we’re trying to do, right?

[atomic sagebrush]

Exactly - it's all about the change from what you were eating recently, and to a lesser extent what you were eating when you got your boys.

What many of us did, myself included, is make regular meals for the family and then just not eat the meat. It's actually easier than you think for most foods - just make salad, veg, side, and meat, then you skip the meat and everyone else eats it. That worked very well for me!