UK SMOG Wannabes - March

[Babymad]

Maybe ~ Many congrats on your little man so pleased all went well, hope you are enjoying all those newborn cuddles xx

Lavender ~ I hope your cycles get sorted soon, it is very hard being on the diet and not ttc, I had a couple of months like hat and it was very frustrating!!

Charlie ~ great to hear from you x I do understand how you are feeling, so always here. Does your DH know it's a boy? Have you spoken about how you feel? It is so hard and I truly know how you are feeling. Lots of love xx

Indigo ~ I'm doing ok, don't really ever get beyond ok but just getting on with it to be honest - what else can I do! I'm really not enjoying this pg for obvious reasons but also because I have been so poorly with one thing or another! It really is one thing after another but unfortunately there is nothing the docs can do. I'm still not sleeping as I spend all night coughing and struggling to breath, I've torn my stomach muscles from the coughing and I'm in agony with that so very fed up with it all. We've had a house full of sickness for the last two weeks so that's been really hard to deal with, I don't have any help with the kids apart from DH when he's here so it's been full on! Just feels like when you think nothing else can go wrong it does....Kwim!! Just trying to think it can only get better........

I have bought a few things for the baby, who still has no name! But I am still finding it hard to accept everything and just don't feel connected/ excited. It's like it's all a chore, I hate feeling this way As chocolate said everyday would be different if you knew it was a girl because what ever the problem you would be able to face it, I am constantly reminding myself what a different day I would have had if I knew I was having a girl.....

Its people's pity I can't bare, I always feel when I am out and about that people feel sorry for me because I have three boys....you wait for people's facial expressions when they realise they are all yours! And then they see I'm pg and I can tell they are thinking 'bet she wants a girl!' I feel like shouting 'it's another boy before you start!'
We were at the dentist after school today and I got the glares I normally do in the waiting room and then when we were leaving I saw a woman arrive with four girls and I just knew that the same people in the waiting room would be saying 'aren't they sweet!' Sorry I could rant all evening!

How are you doing? X Are you finding out?

Deaks ~ How are you feeling?

Battery going so better go....hi to everyone else xx

[charlieispy]

oh babymad x huge hugs x i hope your muscles manage to heal soon!! With you on the pity stares and comments i am dreading the first day in the playground i dont know how i will cope with that x and yes no connection to this baby either - to me its like my life sentence of no daughter this baby is instead of my girl......i cant have anymore after this we dont have the money or room. I hope it will be easier once they are here - i keep looking at my ds3 pics and he was so gorgeous and still is although i am fully prepared for PND as well :S x hugs hun wish we could ALL have our girls as its not fair - why do some get lucky......

DH knows am petrified he has told people i dont want ANYONE To know i will probably kill him if he has!

HUGS ladies to all those who need them......bloody GD i Fing hate it x

oh and to top off my day a lady at surestart pregnant with her 3rd....she has 2 girls asked if i knew what i was having ...no .....neither did she but she said she didnt feel any pressure to have a boy she would be so happy with a 3rd girl.....yeah me too love but i got bloody boys

[pinga]

Congratulations Maybe!!!!!! He's here!!!!! Hope you're enjoying lots of newborn cuddles... ahh they are so scrumptious when they arrive.

Lavender - how very annoying... hope it behaves for next attempt.

Charlie - good to hear from you but sorry you are still a bit of a mess. Don't feel guilty... and don't feel like a bad mum. You are a wonderful mum... you just need some time to focus on you. The boys will be fine and they know that you still love them. I think you should also ask about getting someone to talk to - a counsellor or something. It would really help you to let it out.

I was reading up some gender disappointment stuff and was reading some advice from someone who said "You might discover that many of the hopes you have pinned on having a daughter are still possible to achieve in parenting your boys. Gender is one thing, but children’s individual personalities are often far bigger factors. Enjoying and valuing each of your boys uniquely will put your feelings in perspective and help you to move on."
It made me realise a little that maybe one of my boys will be a sharer and a talker... one I share confidences with... I don't think they'll be into sewing or anything... but maybe they'll love photography or other creative things. When I feel sad (which is still a lot) I try to look at DH and think of all the things I love about him... he's my best friend... he's not always the biggest talker but he's so caring and passionate. And my Dad was one of the most amazing men I've ever met.

Just think we'll be able to get tonnes of big protective hugs from our boys when they are all grown up. And at least I don't have to watch stuff like Angelina Ballerina - hate that show!!
I know it only helps so much... but we must think about the positives otherwise we'll drown in the sad thoughts. Just writing this is making me cry...

Time to go and hug my boys xx

[chocolate]

Charlie- hope the sun is shining in your area and your feeling better. Id def. look at your working hours, that will not help at all!

Babymad, big hugs, I have so many big up days but then down again, think the weather plays a part in this for me. Some days Im so positive and grateful and other days I feel the opposite. I used to read these self help books and keep a free online diary which helped as I could write all my thoughts down and it was a bit of a release.


I feel bad now; my brothers baby has some sort of mucus she keeps coughing up and is yellow so they are doing x rays etc. and maybe transferring her to a neo natal unit, Im hoping its just leftover mucus clearing but app. they thought it was quite serious but google isnt bring anything up really apart from the usual baby mucus etc. Made me feel bad for not being that interested. I said to my mum last night maybe my luck has run out after having 2 healthy boys so will wait for 20 week scan before really publicly announcing

[littlemisswilko]

littlemiss, how are you? i see you are 16 weeks...are you having a gender scan or will you find out at 20 weeks?

i was going to find out at 16 weeks and i kept going on the site to book it and then at the end when i had to pay for it, i just couldnt click the book apointment tab. im just so scared to find out. im dreading it. at the moment im just happy in my little bubble and i dont want to hear something i dont want to. when i think about it, it makes me feel sick. i carnt bring myself to go public with it on fb as i dont think i can handle all the gender comments that will come with it and then i keep thinking to myself when will i go public?? if i leave it too long will ppl think ive been keeping it as a secret?

OH's mother and grand mother keep asking me when my 20 week scan is and i keep lying to them saying 'i havent had my appointment through yet but it will be sometime in april' just so happens i do have my scan date which is the beggining of april but i just dont want the pressure of them knowing im going etc. they keep asking are you going to find out what your having??? and i keep saying im not sure but i dont think so and thy reply with aww you have to find out, you did with the boys and its nice to know what your having so you can be ready for it. then his gran turned round and said you have to put us out of our misery! i was like misery???? you honestly dont know the meaning of the word!

apart from that im quite happy within myself at the moment and thats all that counts i guess. my own mam and sister asked me if i was finding out what im having at the 20 week scan (again they dont know when it is) but i dont really feel they put too much pressure on me! when i told them im not sure my sister did ask me how come and i told her i havent had a suprise yet and she said i suppose and she did say thats why i didnt want to find out with her 3rd boy so i do think she understands how i feel in a way.

[Inglewood]

Morning all,

Sorry to hear many of you are feeling so low. Not sure what to say that hasn't been said already. Other than I send you all a hug and hope you feel better in time.

A old workmate of mine is terminally ill (she's 48), waiting on a call anyday to say she has passed away. So that's on my mind today

Not much to say, but can't go a day (if poss) without saying "hello" to u all. xx

[Sunset]

i was going to find out at 16 weeks and i kept going on the site to book it and then at the end when i had to pay for it, i just couldnt click the book apointment tab. im just so scared to find out. im dreading it. at the moment im just happy in my little bubble and i dont want to hear something i dont want to. when i think about it, it makes me feel sick. i carnt bring myself to go public with it on fb as i dont think i can handle all the gender comments that will come with it and then i keep thinking to myself when will i go public?? if i leave it too long will ppl think ive been keeping it as a secret?

a friend of mine never actually announced her pregnancy on fb. she didnt keep it secret though so her closest friends knew she was pregnant, but she never bothered with the whole public announcement thing.
Do you think you will find out at 20 weeks? i know just how scary the gender scan was so you have my sympathy!

[Sunset]

A old workmate of mine is terminally ill (she's 48), waiting on a call anyday to say she has passed away. So that's on my mind today

Oh no that's so terrible life can be so unfair!

Not much to say, but can't go a day (if poss) without saying "hello" to u all. xx

[auroara78]

chocolate, when is your next scan? i am so curious to find out if your baby is 100% boy or mabye will suprrise you as being a girl!

I really feel for you ladies experiencing GD...it's really tough

I think antidepressants woudl be helpful, Charlie...my old co worker took it during her entire pregnancy (she suffered with anxiety and other issues as well) and she had a healthy baby.

[Babymad]

Hi everyone

I too think GD sucks, so hugs to all of us who are having a rough time xx I really appreciate everyones support xx

I don't always get negative comments when out and about, I suppose when you are feeling low you always concentrate on the crap stuff happening! We went to Build a Bear last week-end to cheer us all up after being ill and the girl stuffing the bears was so kind and said how cute all my boys were.....so its not all bad and all the time

Everyone will be expecting me to have a boy as I have told people that I defo saw a willy so its very likely to be a boy.....cant bring myself to say I know its a boy but makes me feel better saying i saw a willy so that I don't get the girl comments as much.

I am excited about having a new born again as I love the baby bit so I am starting to get abit excited when I think about actually holding a baby in my arms again.....today seems to be a positive day.

The sadness and heart ache will never go I know that.....some days it hurts more than words can describe but I am trying thats all I can do.