UK SMOG Wannabes APRIL

[Petal]

LOL, i was thinking the other day that if i ever had another boy that id nick one of charlies names hahaha, i like her ds3's name, suits her little boy so much :-) hes adorable!

Glad all your boys got into their schools! We had 6 months to wait to hear if ds1 got into the right high school and thank god he did, such a worry, and we r out of catchment!

Oh deaks, it will get better i promise you!! you are still in the early stages and as soon as your little bump grows and you feel him wriggling around you will know he is there for a reason!! he's your little boy and you're his mummy :-) that bond will be there before you know it!! big hugs :-))

Ive been thinking of pgd again today, one minute i think how the hell can i justify spending all that money and no guarentee but then i think why shouldnt we go for it? you only get one life..... i dunno x

[maybebabythree]

Petal - such a hard question - long time dead I say. But then I look at all the failed cycles too

[pinga]

Hey Deaks - the tears will stop. I am ok with bump being DS3. I still occasionally feel a bit overwhelmed at the thought that I'm not having my girl... but just feel kind of sad rather than tearful. Its not very often now.
I am really excited to meet our little boy. I'm hoping this one has DHs lovely dark hair... then I have my multicoloured boys - already have a blonde and a red.

Petal - how much did dr savaas say for PGD? I would love to consider it. DH says another child would be my choice - he would be happy either way. But it isn't really my choice. It would be my doctors - depends what is going on with my kidneys and liver. Don't want to risk my health... I want to be there for them. Might talk to my nephrologist when I get further down the track... but think he would advise against it.

maybe - sounds like your becoming something of an expert on spina bifada. Its good that it all seems to be very mild. I'm terrible with the internet - I can spend hours researching something like that!!!

nothing much to report here... just getting rounder and more tired

[maybebabythree]

Pinga I would need to consider my health if I have another with my history of high bp. No one has told me not to have any more, they just give the impression its not the best idea. I have my six week check today so will see when I can stop my bp pills. If I can't shake this broodyness and have another then I will have to lose some weight. I guess with your issues there is nothing you do to get more healthy. I did at one point after having Dave think I was going to have a stroke because of all the fuss being made. Unfortunatly I forget that too quickly when I need to realise I have three kids that need me healty. I hope your broodyness goes and you don't feel the need for another. But if not then seeking some honest medical advise is very wise. I am a bit stupid in that I would not ask my Doctor if I shouldn't have any more for the sake of my health, I think I already know the answer. I might be brave and ask today but he will roll his eyes at me. He already thinks I'm nuts I'm sure.

[deaks66]

Petal, indigo and maybe, thanks so much for your messages last night, they really made me feel much better and i went to bed in a much better state and slept well (until ds1's night talking started up, waking ds2 eventually...urgh!). Today i feel a bit better and though toddler group this morning was full of gorgeous tiny girls, i coped well and just felt a bit sad rather than it all being totally too much and wanting to leave. A definate step forward. DH also promises to be home early tonight so we talk... dont feel things are great between us at the moment even taking ds3 out of the equation.

After all my pgd research i came away wandering how many people who really want a dd actually go ahead with it all. Obviously its dead expensive but also how do people get their heads around the process. I thought it would be a case of taking pills to sort your cycle out but its needles! I guess the idea just seems overwhelming but once you get on track with it, its just a step by step process that you follow. Petal are you really thinking of going ahead with it and where do you think you will choose?

Hope you are all well today. Pinga and maybe, must be hard the extra pressure of health worries impacting your decision of whether you will try for another. Mind you sometimes i wander whether if the decision was taken out of my hands it might be easier to come to terms with it. Probably doesnt work like that though!

[2monkeyboys]

Hi ladies,
Hope you are all okay today. Sending hugs out to all that need one (((hugs)))
Glad most of you seem to have got your first choice schools. I got my second choice although my first was a long shot as it was a nice little village school which I'm just out of catchment for. Tbh the schools around here are nothing great to get excited about and you do seem to only ever get your catchment ones. The 2 nearest to me are certainly not the worst but I chose the one that I'd heard better things about and with the other although a catholic school (my dp and boys are RC) bullying issues just kept coming up. Anyway put my choices in by the cut off date and then bugger me the better school had an ofsted report in Feb and has been put in special measures!! I read the report and it was so bad . It seems that all the good reports I'd heard was because all the kids do love the school but they were behind on where they should be for their age and the parents weren't informed of what should be expected of them in terms of progress. On the bright side though at least now they have had that massive slap I'm the face and a detailed report on the areas in which they are failing which seem to be everywhere they will sort it out with extra help thrown at them. Even talk of it becoming an academy although I'm not sure what that means or how it will work. Didn't help that the head teacher, deputy head and chairman of governing body all left at the same time in autumn term last year. They will get a new head starting In sept so hopefully the school will really pick up now they know they are on the radar. I'm still ok about ds1 going there as my main importance was him to enjoy school. My nephew went to an 'outstanding' ofsted reported catholic school and has had a very unhappy time at school
Maybe, hope dave is now flying with his feeding!
Pinga, how cool would multicoloured boys be! I have red hair but both my boys are sort of light brownish I suppose. My dp is pretty dark as he is half Italian and ds2 is spitting image of him as a child so think he will go darker. Are you on fb as I'd love to see your boys.
Love to everyone else xxx

[2monkeyboys]

So glad you are feeling a little better deaks. Hope you have a good chat with your dh and he is supportive and understanding. Xx

[maybebabythree]

2Monkeys I was turned down for all three of my choices for DS1. I live tbh in very nice village (don't own this house mores the pity) and I was offered a failing school (closed twice in ten years and on special measures) but the reason was it the area it in. The parentd fight outside the school. The kids fight at the school. Violence was mentioned on the ofsted report! Needles to say he was NOT sent there!! I had a feeling they was trying to pull good parents in to bring the standards up and I wasn't having my kid going there. I went to one of the worst 15 schools in England. I have a degree, my sister has a degree, her best friend has a masters and her two brothers both have phd's - one from Cambridge and one Oxford. As long as the school is good enough and a child wants to work they will do just fine.

Deaks me and Petal have looked at genesis in Cyprus. All you need to do before the cycle is have some blood work and scans then fly over. They do all the meds and can even inject you! But yes its a nasty expensive experience. You can email them - the doctor is lovely. I think its a nice dream for me and keeps the feelings of never having a dd away. But in reality I don't think I will ever do it. I feel so much better about not having a dd now. Yes I still want one but not so much. Some days I think good god never again and on the good days I think I can handle four kids! Did you ever see a documentary on pdg a year or so back? Showed a few ladies from IG (it was called five boys wanting a girl or something like that). One of the IG ladies was shown doing pdg. That did make me think I could never do it. But I guess if you took it one day at time it would be do-able. But not if you don't like needles! I can't see myself injecting everyday!

[deaks66]

Deaks me and Petal have looked at genesis in Cyprus. All you need to do before the cycle is have some blood work and scans then fly over. They do all the meds and can even inject you! But yes its a nasty expensive experience. You can email them - the doctor is lovely. I think its a nice dream for me and keeps the feelings of never having a dd away. But in reality I don't think I will ever do it. I feel so much better about not having a dd now. Yes I still want one but not so much. Some days I think good god never again and on the good days I think I can handle four kids! Did you ever see a documentary on pdg a year or so back? Showed a few ladies from IG (it was called five boys wanting a girl or something like that). One of the IG ladies was shown doing pdg. That did make me think I could never do it. But I guess if you took it one day at time it would be do-able. But not if you don't like needles! I can't see myself injecting everyday!

Genesis does seem to be the one that everyone is most positive about from what i can read at the moment but are there still queries about whether pgd is illegal in south cyprus? I have no fear of needles its more the fact that the process seems long, complicated and tiring (not to mention expensive), without guarentee and you could be left feeling VERY disappointed. But then the alternative is no dd! Is genesis cheaper than the ukcfa route? and are there any stats for success rates for each? Feel like if i was to ever do pgd, id quite like to get it all researched and sorted in my head before ds3 arrives, then enjoy his babyhood having put it to rest and see where i am 6-months to a year after he is born. If the desire for dd is still there i could then just go ahead with it already sorted in my mind.

[deaks66]

2 monkeys, glad you at least got your second choice school. And i firmly believe that ofsted reports should be taken very much with a pinch of salt. I see it time after time where i live that for a few years a school has a brilliant ofsted report for them only to sit on their laurels and slowly decline again while other school with less success with ofsted strive to improve and become great within a couple of years. Sounds like if the children there are happy, once they get an established senior team going again, things will pick up. Better than a school with renound bullying issues for sure!

Sunset, did you accept the place you were given as i know you werent impressed?