ColdWater, can you take a look please?

[Waiting4Daisy]

Deleted.

[Princess of Pink]

While many of us may agree that you should not make a comparison to an infertile woman, GD is difficult and can almost feel like a death has occurred even though logically, we know we should be happy with what we are given.

We have people openly talking about aborting the next child if thie next isn't the "right" gender so there are many levels to GD and not all are understood nor tolerated by all.

I have to agree with you here 110%. GD can be bloody bad and feel exactly like a death!! You know the night I found out about DD#5 being a girl...in the dark of the middle of the night when I could finally sob without feeling guilty....I think it felt equally as bad as my pregnancy losses. My chest physical ached like my heart was broken, I couldn't breathe, I was lost and wished I could take it all back and not be pregnant anymore. I felt like my son that I had dreamed of and planned for my whole life had died. I think some comparison can be made...both women have a dream, a longing deep in their hearts to experience something, you throw so many years and tries again and again into something...something you really have no control over...you see people all over the world getting exactly what you want and it always seems just out of your reach!! It hurts and makes you sad and your life is consumed with what you just can't have.

I don't think all women understand it even those with one gender. I believe it gets worse and worse with each child...I don't believe someone on child 2, 3, 4 understand what it feels like to have baby 5, 6 and 7 of the same gender. I too have experienced losses (5 of them including one set of twins)....and no that didn't make the GD any better or make me thankful that I could just have a baby.

[3 men & a little lady]

Blaming GD for everything shouldn't be the case here as she is so adamant this is her girl. Why would she have GD with this pregnancy if she is so certain this is her girl? What she is saying goes beyond GD. I think she is suffering from depression or maybe even something entirely different. She needs to seek medical help if she is thinking about throwing herself under a truck because a comment she made got a bad reaction......and it's not good for her kids to be seeing her like this either. She has been crying for days according to herself which I can only assume is from what was written on IG. Believe it or not they majority of people there were only trying to protect you. She's not doing herself or her kids any good. I think she needs a break from all this. Wishing you the best with your scan in 15 days Joanna and I truely do hope you get your girl xxx

[JoannaK]

Joanna, I don´t know if you already did, but wouldn´t you like to join a due date buddies-thread on here?
That way we can continue to chat without focusing on the negative stuff

Thankyou so much for your offer Indira, but I think I'll pass. I've only just gotten.home from hospital after beinh there overnight, I'm leaving forums now as they're clearly not good for my health and I need to think about what's best for my children, as Little xmen 3 & little princess indicated, as they are the ones who matter most.

[pinkin2011]

I hope you are ok Joannak??
Sounds horrible being like that you poor thing! And being in hospital??
Your scan is not far away now so thats something to really look forward to!!

[JoannaK]

Thanks pinkin., I'm on bedrest at the moment but I can't stay online otherwise DH will get cranky with me. There's just one more thing I wanted to get cleared up, as I know first hand how dangerous it is to make assumptions and share those assumptions on an online medium.. Little Men. X3 and 1 princess, I want to make clear that I'm not upset because of IG. Did it hurt me? Some of the comments, absolutely. But the reason I've been so upset, and am so upset, is because I've disappointed people on this thread. I thought I have been really kind to people here and in return, I had their support.. But as a result of one comment I made, I lost all that respect.. People who told me previously that they supported me, and then came out and told me they've lost all respect for me, that really hurts. Do I deserve it?. Most definitely. Does it make me undeserving to be really devastated by it? I don't believe so. I am a good person. There are very few things I like about myself but if there is one thing I can credit myself for is that I care SO MUCH. It is the reason why I became a mother, and it is the reason why my sons, hopefully, love me. My family and close friends believe I care too much, and that is the reason why I've been so upset, because I have let people down. And that is a pain I will harbour for years. I can't just "not care", if I could do that, I'd be a different person and my life would have taken vastly different paths. But if my main "problem" is that I care too much about not hurting or disappointing people, I'm fairly confident there are worse qualities to have in this world. That is all I wanted to say, because I don't think it's fair to make such a critical assumption on somebody's mental wellbeing. Pinkin, 14 days to go, can't wait to update you! And I can't wait to hear your results xxo

[sweetsister]

I think sometimes words can be misinterpreted on the internet and this goes for both sides I really think both sides have the best intentions at heart and this is just a big mess now,what is most important is Joanna,and her baby,i hope you get better and try not to let it get to you ,every tomorrow has two handles,we can take hold of it with the handle of anxiety or the handle of faith. to everyone and please no more

[Irishmom]

Joannek I'm so sorry if my post upset you it really wasn't my intention. I'm just a nervous wreck myself at the minute waiting to confirm everything is ok with this pregnancy and your comment upset me. I should have ignored it.

Please put it behind you and take care of yourself and your baby. No hard feelings at all, we all say silly things and regret them. Let's blame the hormones and move on.

[JoannaK]

That's ok irish mom, I'm keeping you in my thoughts, I hope you feel some relief very soon xxo

[cj's kids]

Hi am new to this forum but Joanna I hope things are going well and that you found out conclusively what you're having! Update when you can - we all support you!