Bbaby Boy #3

[jazzers]

Hi Ladies,

I haven't been on this site for a few months now (I stopped coming here just before I found out I was pregnant because I was starting to obsess a bit). Anyways, I'm now 19 weeks, and I was going to wait until birth to find out the sex of this baby. But...I went for my ultrasound a couple days ago, and I just knew I saw boy parts (we have two boys, and were trying for a girl). Since then, I haven't been able to get my mind off of it, and my girlfriend, who is pregnant with her second (first is a boy) is due a week after me, and just found out she is having a baby girl. Anyways, I was upset enough that I figured it didn't matter if I knew for sure or not, so I went in today and had a gender ultrasound done. 100% boy. I was right all along. I even had been having weird dreams where the baby would be born a girl, but then die. Or the baby would be born with girl parts, and then a couple days later, we would discover the baby actually had a penis....really really disturbing dreams.

Anyways, I guess this time I am not so upset about this one being a boy (I love my boys to death), but what really upsets me is the fact that I don't know if I want to be pregnant again, as a 4th would be a huge stretch for us. And that really upsets me...the fact that I may never ever experience having a baby girl of my own. I just don't know how to get over this. None of my friends understand. And my mom, who I would usually go to, also just doesn't understand, and makes me feel bad for wanting a baby girl so badly, when I "should be happy with any healthy baby".

I haven't told anyone that I found out the sex, other than my husband, who guessed, when I came home with the boys with puffy eyes from crying. I just may not tell anyone until the baby arrives....

I'm sorry for the long winded message. I guess I'm just looking for someone who understands and may have some comforting words

[bythestream]

Im so sorry you didn't here girl :-( I will probably feel the same if I have another boy even though I tell my self another boy will be ok. Take your time to come to terms with it, buy him something special.

[jazzers]

Thanks I already feel better today. I knew in my heart all along that this would be a boy. And on the positive, my husband and I have had some really good conversations in the last day that make me feel closer to him, and us stronger as a couple. I can't wait to meet this little boy, and see what he is all about, and watch him wrestle with the older two and join right in on the action! My husband has even been agreeable to talking about high tech and using PGD to have a 4th (oh my goodness, I don't know that I want to be pregnant again though!! This is so exhausting!). So it is really nice to know that at least if we had unlimited funds, and were willing to put everything into it, we could be guaranteed a girl. I don't know why, but that is comforting to me. I guess because there is still hope? Thanks again for replying

[bythestream]

That's great you have a supportive husband, I do too . Mine was only saying the other day how he wasn't sure he could give me a girl, they just want us to be happy don't they. You will forget how exhausting pregnancy is after he is here I know I do

[jazzers]

It is amazing how quickly you forget the discomforts of pregnancy, isn't it?! I thought the first trimester of this pregnancy was going to kill me. Amazingly, I'm still here...and those adorable little newborns sure do make up for any aches and pains and exhaustion Oh well, I always told him 3 was a terrible number for children anyways - everyone should either have 2 or 4 so no one is left out!! Best of luck to you with your girl this year!! I sure hope you hear pink!

[Yuzu]

I'm in the same boat, expecting the fourth boy! I go from thinking, "Oh, I'll do high tech next time," to "why am I even considering another pregnancy at my age?" I honestly change my mind from minute to minute. DH doesn't really understand GD. I don't understand it myself. I think how nice it is to have two older and two younger...and then I think, but I'll never have a girl. Oh, it's so confusing!

No answers from me, but I understand.

[jazzers]

Looks like we're due around the same time too Dec 14th here!

Yes, I have such mixed feelings about this pregnancy, and the possibility of getting pregnant again (at this point, there is no way in h*ll I will get pregnant the "old-fashioned way" again - with or without swaying, as it obviously didn't work for me this time.

I have started to research doing PGD/IVF, and my husband and I have had some good conversations. I feel like that is what I want/need to do. Fortunately, I am still young, so time is on my side. But I completely know how you feel. I don't think there ever are any answers either. I keep asking myself "what is it that makes me so obsessed with having a girl anyways?". Maybe if I could figure that out, I could get over it. But for now...I still really long for that little girl, and the pink sheets, and dresses, and cute hats.....

[Pstar32]

I am finding out the gender of my third on Tuesday! You sound like me I don't know how I'll be when I hear boy but I adore my other two! I'm 36 so don't have huge amounts of time but I think I'd be doing one more pregnancy regardless of gender anyway. Congratulations on your new baby, I'm due 7th December so we may both be getting our 3rd gorgeous boys then. Best of luck!

[jazzers]

Good luck!! I swore I wouldn't find out this time. After my girlfriend found out she was having a girl (first is a boy), I couldn't take it any longer. I do not regret finding out at all, and am starting to really enjoy the thought of three boys. We haven't told anyone we know though, and if asked, we tell them the gender of this one is a surprise. I think that is one of the biggest frustrations for me - telling someone you're having the third boy and getting the "sympathy" card, or being asked if we'll have another. I found that with DS2, so I imagine it's only worse with #3! Of COURSE I've already thought of this, but I'm really trying hard to focus on enjoying THIS pregnancy and not obsessing over the next.

Best of luck to you on Tuesday! Would love to hear what you're having!

[jazzers]

Oh, and secretly, I'm glad now that it's a boy. I think 4 is a much better number for kids than 3, and I'm really looking forward to evening out the numbers again! (fingers crossed we don't have twins...although wouldn't that be something - twin girls after 3 boys!?!)