Due in March/April/May 2013 Roll call!

[auroara78]

it's 4:39 am here and I'm up because baby is like wide awake now...she's become a nite owl in the last few nites.... /sigh hehe

[Tiffani3]

Good luck Rosie xx

[suregena]

@surgena - when too engorged its hard for baby to latch and I always suggest hand expressing or reverse pressure softening to help soften up the breast, just enough for baby to be able to latch.

Yes, I know! Believe me, I spent a lot of time in those pre-days where the milk had not regulated hand expressing, either in the bath or into a breastpad pre-feeding. My boobs were seriously huge!

[suregena]

Too many docs here tell moms "you tried but you just can't do it... Here, have a box of similac."

Family do that as well, too, though! It's madness! Husbands, the mother's mother, aunts, friends, etc. Support is SO crucial in breastfeeding. So, so crucial. My mother and my husband both knew I did not want them to ever say that to me, ever... that we would persevere and get through it, even if I felt like I couldn't... I needed their voices to keep encouraging me.

Even if the mother is sobbing and at her wit's end, the *last* thing to ever do is tell her to "take a break and give formula, just this once..."
It's all it takes to create a spiral away from a successful breastfeeding. And when doctor's say/do those things, they are in a position of trust/power and a lot of people will follow what they say without finding another way.

[suregena]

I guess I have some shows to watch! I haven't seen any of the ones you ladies talk about lol!!

Welcome TT! And good luck tomorrow Rosie!!

NC, I love your plan I'm not sure if I want to look into microsort or something in the future (although I doubt we could afford it) or just try again naturally. And my mom already begged me to wait until this one is at least 2 to try again lol. We live so far away its hard for her to get time to come up for the birth. But she's done it every time thankfully. And I don't know how breast feeding will go this time... DS1 was allergic to my milk and it got to the point where his body was eating away at his muscles and bones bc he was pretty much starved to death. It makes me cry every time I think about how skinny and frail he was. I didn't have a clue what was wrong, and didn't want to give up breast feeding and it took so long for him to get a diagnosis, but as soon as he did, he was put on Nutramigen (stinky, expensive formula!) He immediately took to it and started gaining weight. Then comes DS2 who wasn't allergic, but ended up failure to thrive as well. He couldn't get enough calories from my milk no matter what I tried. So I breast fed him until 11 months but just got tired of him being so small. He had fallen off the chart and his own growth pattern months before, so his ped, who is very pro- breast milk, prescribed him preemie high calorie formula. Now he's gaining well also. So DH and I have agreed if there are any problems this time, I won't let the baby suffer through it like the other 2 did.

Allergic to your breastmilk? From what I understand, that's not really possible (though doctor's have told mother's that often.) What can be the cause is the baby can have extreme sensitivity or allergy to things you eat, but that can be hard to pinpoint. So it isn't *your milk* per se, it's likely other things.

Also, I know in the UK they do it, but do they use 1 chart for weight gain in infants there or are there two? Here there is a growth/weight chart for formula fed infants and another one for breastfed infants, because both will grow/gain completely differently. The UK used to use a standard formula-fed infant one for all infants but then that made breastfed infants seem to be slow gainers and smaller so they went back and looked into it. For all I know, in the US it's likely possible they're still using a very general chart that may not correspond accurately for breastfed baby weight gain and growth.


Your milk will always make the right calories for your baby. The calories adjust constantly - they're never the same. Breastfed babies will not gain as fast nor as much as formula fed.

[suregena]

I had major problems bf too with both my sons, over here 95% of women bf so I felt like a complete freak and was absolutely devastated

Both time I had them on the boob within minutes of giving birth, I fed on demand, I continuously asked for help while I was in hospital (you stay in for 3 to 4 days over here) to try and make sure I was doing it properly and even tried an electric breastpump in between feeds. Both times by day 3 the boys had lost more than 10% of their body weight and I was told I needed to give some formula to keep them healthy. They use a cup over here so they don't confuse them, so the baby basically laps the milk. Both times my boobs didn't change size hardly at all and my milk just didn't come in. I've got books, a dvd all sorts to try and help.

This time part of me doesn't want to go through the sadness again and I am partly tempted to just bottle feed from the start, but I am really hoping that my body will have got to grips with what to do this time and my milk will come in so I can successfully breastfeed this time.

I so wish bf was easy for me! Any advice is very welcome Suregena xx

Did you feed as long as the baby required, even if it was for an hour? My son seriously would feed an hour sometimes... and I just let him. I suppose I lucked out because (my midwives were surprised), he didn't lose any weight at all... he only ever gained. He did have a syringe of my hand expressed milk once (oh, those early latching learning times!) but that was it.

Another suggestion for women having trouble with weight gain but that still want to breastfeed... a great thing to use is an SNS... (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Supplem...nursing_system) because you can feed your child whatever - formula, breast milk, but the baby is still "feeding at your breast" so you breasts will always be stimulated... and hopefully it can lead to you not needing to use it and the baby able to feed from you directly. The stimulation is what helps get the milk going and in the early days, even though you are WHOA WHOA tired, feeding nonstop and being near your baby at all times is the best thing to do.

Did any of you use soothers from the get go, as well? That can cause latching issues, just like early introduction of a bottle, as well. Breastfeeding gets stimulation when it is used as a soother and for food. You can introduce a soother once breastfeeding is going well and firmly established, but it is probably best to not use it in the beginning... especially if you have a history of struggling with breastfeeding in the past. *Anything* that could get in the way of the baby's constant, round the clock access to the breast should be discouraged if possible. For some women, a dummy/pacifier/soother or early bottle introduction/pumping won't affect them at all... and for others, it can sometimes make breastfeeding that much harder to get going.

I was part of a breastfeeding group before I gave birth and I read about it heavily. I read about common concerns I'm reading here in breastfeeding communities and in articles, so they were always in my head when I began on my breastfeeding journey... and it helped me always find a way to correct what was seeming not right. I credit the immersing of myself in it to helping me carry on so successfully.

[suregena]

I need to STOP reading about symptoms going away. Ugh. I feel almost normal today, for the most part... it's freaking me out. Not that my symptoms have been that awful to begin with. :/

The midwife is coming over to my house tomorrow because two of the blood samples they took last week were rejected and they have to do it again, so I guess I'm just going to let them know I'm nervous. I know I won't get an ultrasound (it's only a couple weeks until I'm 12 weeks... just waiting for an appointment for that) but maybe they can tell me I'm most likely fine. :/ I have this horrible fear of the 12 week scan showing bad stuff... like a missed miscarriage. I cannot shake this paranoia!

[Shellbelle]

Suregena, I completely understand the paranoia! I won't feel comfortable until I hear the hb in two weeks. I'm just refusing to look things up on google, because I know that whatever I find will make the fear worse.

I hope you feel more reassured after your visit!

[Rosie85]

Thanks for the support ladies, I am really hoping I am wrong in thinking I will hear blue today. Will update later in the afternoon.

[Turning the page]

Good morning, ladies! I've been more a lurker than a poster since I've been on this site, but it's still been a great help for me. So I'm gonna jump in today...need some emotional support from some gals that understand! Struggling with whether or not to find out the gender these days; I had no intention of doing so, until I made the mistake of trying the Intelligender test yesterday...it said a very clear "boy" result, which has bummed me out far more than it should have.
Now, I'm tempted to take a "brief peek" at our 12 week NT scan in two weeks of the nub, just to get a general idea, without anyone saying anything to me. That way, if there's a clear nub, I can absorb the news without being directly "told". My DH thinks I'm crazy. Sigh. I will be blessed with a healthy baby of either gender.