Find out at Gender Scan or wait till Christmas???

[Blue chance2013]

I am not sure if this is the right place to post this. But hopefully you ladies can help.

I have my anatomy scan this friday. My DH can't make it because of work. He was a little bummed, so we agreed that I would have the tech write it down and we will open it on Christmas morning.

I have been so excited about finding out the gender and was bummed when DH said he couldn't make it. We really want a boy. I will be fine if it is a girl because at least my DD will have a sister close in age. I was so disappointed when I found out DD was a girl, as soon as I got to the car I bawled. I had always pictured my life with 2 boys or at least having the boy first. I got over my sadness pretty fast, since she was our first and I knew I had another chance. This is our last child, so my last chance. I love my DD more than anything in the world, and so I keep telling myself I won't be disappointed if this is a girl. But i can't say for sure that I won't shed a tear or two for that boy i'll never have. I don't think i'll be extremely disappointed if it is another girl ( I kind of expect it anyway) and DH really doesn't care either. Of course he wants a boy but would be perfectly happy with another girl.

Anyways, I am kind of thinking about finding out at the ultrasound, but not telling DH. I feel like then I will be able to deal with the feelings before Christmas. Christmas is also my DH's birthday so I don't want to be sad all day and ruin the whole day. Plus, we would then be going to my parents house for dinner and they all know that we are finding out the sex that day. So, I'll have to deal with all the comments if it is another girl. If I find out friday then I have time to come to terms with it. But then part of me wants to wait and keep that hope for a boy a little longer. Plus, if it is a boy it would be an amazing feeling to find out on Christmas. I just don't know what the best thing to do is. I am running out of time.....

What do you think you girls would do in this situation?

[Blue chance2013]

I just realized my post is kind of all over the place. Just trying to get all my thoughts out at once. Sorry if it is hard to follow....

[dloui128]

I had a similar situation, DH wanted to go team green and I didn't. I went for an elective u/s without telling him and found out. I just wanted to prepare myself, I was having anxiety over not knowing. It ended up being a boy and of course I was excited and couldn't keep it a secret. Had it been a girl I think I would of kept it to myself and mentally starting preparing myself to be a mother to 3 girls. In the end its up to you, do you think you would feel better knowing?

[The Anchor]

I had a similar situation, DH wanted to go team green and I didn't. I went for an elective u/s without telling him and found out. I just wanted to prepare myself, I was having anxiety over not knowing. It ended up being a boy and of course I was excited and couldn't keep it a secret. Had it been a girl I think I would of kept it to myself and mentally starting preparing myself to be a mother to 3 girls. In the end its up to you, do you think you would feel better knowing?

I did the exact same thing as dloui. I had swayed boy, DH wanted a boy (although he didn't help out in the sway department at all), but he didn't want to find out. I on the other hand HAD to find out, so I made an appt for an elective u/s. Found out it was boy and by some miracle was able to keep it to myself until the big day. Also should mention that everyone thought I was psychic, because I kept telling everyone I think it's a boy

[Mum23boys]

there is no way i could keep it from hubby - he would take one look at my face and know and i knew but if you think you can keep it a secret go for it - i was even debating it this time around but dont want to dash my opes and ruin the last 20 weeks of my pregnancy so im going to live in ignorant bliss and denial for the next 34 weeks and keep hold o that little bit of hope as long as i can.
Im sure it being xmas would elp take your mind off things if it was a girl and you and dh can help each other through - if you find out before and its a girl you will have a few extra days on top trying to deal with it and will be alone in doing so too.
Id wait but thats me - everyone is different and only you know the answer.
Good luck whatever you decide - I hope you get your son.

[hotdogz&boyz]

I had similar concerns. I did not want to find out at the same time as my spouse because I felt I needed time to digest if I was not getting my DG. My husband did not care what we were having. I thought seriously about doing team green, figuring that I wouldn't care when baby was born. But I couldn't handle the wait. So I decided to find out alone and have time to deal with my feelings. The timing worked for us, because DH wanted to know and I surprised him for his birthday with what it was. But honestly, I think I could have hidden it from him for a couple weeks if needed. I came home and had a box of balloons that he didn't open for hours and I didn't freak out or anything. And I did get my DG...I dunno what would be harder to hide. I think probably not getting it, since I was already moody as it stood. But I would not want to ruin Christmas by finding out that day, especially if there was a chance I was going to feel sad. I needed time before I had to tell anyone. Me...I would find out beforehand and keep it to myself. Practice your surprised face

[Mrs_P]

i found out with ds2 and didn't tell dh, so i had a few days to deal with it first. Not that i was that bothered then, that was pre-gd for me, it was just he wanted the surprise but i wanted to know as i felt like i wasn't bonding with the baby as i knew with ds1 he was a boy from early on, i found it hard to picture my second. Wasn't that hard to keep from him.

I'm kinda in the same position now, am either going to the best or worst Christmas present ever. But i still think i need to know. Although xmas morning would be a hard time to find out, unless it all goes right of course, but i don't think anyone would blame you for not wanting to take the risk. I don't think he'd even notice either, in his reaction he probably wouldn't notice yours for a good few seconds so gives you time to get your game face on

[Cinss]

If it was me in this situation i would use the reveal as Hubbys gift. Basically i would find out, and have the tech write it on a card for hubby to open for xmas/birthday gift.

[Ipadmad]

Can you not get it written down, but you and your dh open it up together, but not on christmas day? I.e. when he is back? When is he back?

[My Three Sons]

I don't think that I could find out and not have it written all over my face that I know. On the other hand, I don't think that I could have it in the envelope and not look.... I would go on and find out and tell DH that I was doing so.