Can I do this? (name issue)

[Tiggerian]

Yeah, I just know that our culture can be a bit funny about a name.

For example,

Say I had a girl on facebook I went to school with - despite never really being friends with her, and not having seen her for years, some would consider it rude if she named her baby the same as one of my sons.

Now In my opinion that's silly. But some people do get really anal and uptight about names and find it a complete no-no to use a name a friend, sister, cousin or acquaintance also likes.

[hotdogz&boyz]

Okay...when I was 15 I swore I was going to have a daughter and name her andromeda. Like the galaxy. And I would call her Andi for short.

Fast forward ten years, that name has never once graced DH and my list of names. I don't love it any more. DH hates it (duh, it's weird!) and our tastes have changed. She doesn't even know what her husband thinks about it. He could have dated an Alice who turned out to be a man. Or went to school with an isobel who was know for tramping around and he has a bad connotation with the name. No such thing as "claiming" names...especially at that age. I would take it more seriously if she were your age, producing children and her husband agreed to the name. But she is a kid who has no idea what the future holds.

Not to mention, I have two cousins, full-sisters who see each other weekly at least. They named their son the same name. It's a family name and they both wanted to include it in their sons name. So one had a Blake Maddex and they call him Max. One has a Blake Alexander and they call him Blake. Clearly they worked it out fine. And Alice-isobel and Alys are not really that close anyway. Do what you want!!

[BabyCakesTor]

My exH name is Jesse... His cousin who is 6mths older than him is Jessica. They live very close and see each other often.. His and her Mom (sisters) are very very close.. My step sister and her half sister have son name Aiden. No issues.

I agree with a pp about not disclosing names. I would only disclose my names if no one close to me was pregnant and could use the name before me. Use your dream name! They can not forbid u to use any certain name and especially if they aren't even close to having kids. And you have to choose a name you love for your kids, not one that "eh I guess this will do". There's a lot to a name. I have learned with this pregnancy I am keeping the name to myself, not even my husband will know definite name until baby is born because NO ONE is gonna steal my thunder. It takes a lot to find a name!

[Tiggerian]

Babycakes - How does that work with your DH? Doesn't he mind that much? My DH vetoes everything!!!

I really want a boy to be Jasper this time and he just completely vetoes it, but the only other name he likes is Maximillian - which, I'm sorry to say, is a bit too 'posh' for me. Plus our surname is Miller.. Maximillian Miller is a bit of a tongue twister.

My DH says to use Alys/Alice too. He wants the proper spelling of it and doesn't see the issue. Especially as we don't live in the same country, dont speak that much and hardly ever see each other.

[Mum23boys]

my friend who is pregnant came over yesterday and we talked about her names for a baby and she said they only really liked 1 boys name but couldnt use it as he friend also liked it ( her friend isnt even pregnant and last year liked the name william ) so i said stuff it if you like george call him george ( if its a boy) i really believe she will have a girl though as she already has 1 boy and is the sort to get a perfect boy girl family like our other friends who is also pregnant ( with a girl after boy)
Its going to be only me with all boys
Anyway back to the subject if you like it and your baby is first call it what the hell u like.

[BabyCakesTor]

Babycakes - How does that work with your DH? Doesn't he mind that much? My DH vetoes everything!!!

I really want a boy to be Jasper this time and he just completely vetoes it, but the only other name he likes is Maximillian - which, I'm sorry to say, is a bit too 'posh' for me. Plus our surname is Miller.. Maximillian Miller is a bit of a tongue twister.

My DH says to use Alys/Alice too. He wants the proper spelling of it and doesn't see the issue. Especially as we don't live in the same country, dont speak that much and hardly ever see each other.

It's my Ex-husband.... Lol There's never been any talk on that since I've known him (14 years). No one even mentions it or says "that's weird". I had a convo with his mom about names and she said she loved the name Jesse and didn't care what anyone said or whatever... That was the name she liked and that was that. IMO when it comes to a name pick one you love! At some point your child will ask why you choose that name and what other names you wanted ect. I wanted to be able to say because I love your name! Plus you will be saying it A LOT! Idk what people would say, for instance my youngest is named Damon Edward... People always say " wow you named your son after two vampires?!" And the truth is NO! I've loved the name Damon since Damon Wayne's (even though Damon Salvatore is so freaking HOTT!) and Edward was my DH grandfather who passed away when I was pregnant with him. I guess my point is that everyone is going to have some sort of opinion, (they're like a**holes,everyone has one) that's why I'm keeping my name to myself until this one is born. I don't care to hear what people think.

I watch 90210 and one of the character is Max Miller...honestly I love the name... Not to crazy about Maximilian though but again that's just my opinion. There can be a compromise... you can put together pieces of paper with your complete names (all variations) and he can do his and put them in a hat and pick one. The only way that will work is if they're names that you both could live with... And express to him because I have to do this with my DH ALL the time, that these are SUGGESTIONS, not for sure names and he can't veto every single one! (Unless he truly hates them that much) KWIM? Sometimes it's a first reaction to say "OMG NO!" But maybe if you say I'll think about it, he might start too.

[Tiggerian]

Well to be honest, I think I'll get my way in the end if its another boy. He really isn't that fussed as long as its a 'normal' name. He just likes to be difficult. Last night for example I read out names from a namebook - he said no to all of them! Seriously, not a single name in an entire BOOK he said yes too... Thank God I'm not pregnany yet or I think I'd gone on a hormonella trip lol!

A boy will have his brothers name as middlename too - which is why I'm pushing for a name I really like. He is really close to him, so wants to honour him and thats fine. But dang it then I want to pick the first name lol :P

[zebaniee]

I say go with Alice too, first in best dressed

[NearlyDone]

If she had a child already with that name then i wouldn't use it but id say whoever has a dd first is fair game

[zibibbogirl]

I agree with what others have said, she is 15. Who is to say she will have children, let alone a DD and if she does, her child will be nowhere near yours in age. If you like the name, your OH likes it too, go for it. It is hard enough to pick a name both people like let alone worry about what other people think.

My ex SIL asked me my baby girl name when we were both pregnant. I made the mistake of telling her honestly and when she had her DD three months before I was due, she called her DD the name I had chosen. Luckily I had a DS anyway and since then my taste in names has changed. Also, now she is my ex SIL I no longer see her or her DD. She was the brand of crazy to do it deliberately so I really wasn't shocked.

My DH has two first cousins with the same name (so three sisters all gave their sons the same first name). It's a family name and nobody cares, all of them have a different nickname anyway.