September 2013 babies!!

[WantingPink]

Had my 20 week scan today and the baby is measuring completely normal and is still a girl I feel like I can breath a little easier and relax until the baby is born!

[Mum to three girls]

Okay ladies I could really use your opinions, experience, advice, thoughts, etc. DH and I really got into it tonight over when his Mom is going to come out to see the baby. I am scheduled for a C-section on a Friday so he wants his Mom to fly out and stay with us the Wednesday before the baby is born until ??? Probably at least two weeks after the baby is born. I really like his Mom however, my Mom is in town and I would prefer my Mom being with me (if I need someone) after the baby is born to help out with the kids while I recover from my C-section. I tried to explain to DH that I would be most comfortable with my own Mom being the one that is around while I am post C-section, in my pajamas, waiting for my milk to come in, hoping my incision doesn't get infected, boobs hanging out, bleeding like a stuck pig, hormonal crying, hair in knots, sleep deprived hot mess!! I like his Mom a lot however, I don't want to have to worry about her comfort, I want to worry about mine and the baby. DH is making me feel like a selfish bi*ch for wanting her to come out two weeks after the baby is born. He even went as far as saying "well then I will tell her not to come out at all then".

WTF?? Am I missing something?? It it normal for the MIL to come and stay with you before until after the baby is born?? Please give me some insight on this... I don't understand why it is a big deal that she waits and comes out two weeks after the baby is born and I am feeling a little more human. I know for a fact it is NOT her that is pushing to come out before the baby is born. I know that she even knew that we were fighting about this that she would completely understand about this and would gladly come out two weeks after the baby was born. She is always more than accommodating and understanding (sometimes too accommodating and understanding). This is 100% coming from my DH. Has anyone else had this experience? What would you tell DH if he was insisting his Mom come for when the baby is born until after the baby is born?

I'd say no. DH's mother and grandmother came out for three weeks immediately after DD3 was born and although they were helpful and lovely it was just too much for me. I'd had my first section and they were practically very helpful but the extra strain of guests was just too much. I'd have rather had beans on toast for tea and piles of washing than the extra effort of guests at a time when I'm most vulnerable (tired/hormonal).

All going well I should have a normal delivery this time but even if I don't I'm insisting on at least two weeks of no guests (this actually includes my mum as well) so we can regroup as a family.

[Girlsway]

WantingPink is your DH going to take time off after the delivery? The first moments with a new baby are precious and you dont want other people to interfere. Can your DH look after you for a while and have guests to help out when he is back to work?

I am pro two weeks of no staying guests idea as Mum to 3 girls suggested and also from my own experience. That could be a compromise for both sides of the family.

[Girlsway]

Good luck Thorz today! How many hours now?

[Mum to three girls]

Was Elements having her anatomy scan this week?

[Northern_Shutterbug]

WantingPink - I can completely understand, its my mum that pushed to be there when DS1 was born and as he was 8 days late it was very hard work! This time they'll book flights for about a month after. My MIL only lives 3 miles away but doesn't interfere unless asked. I would be saying no to MIL and perhaps a just have mum there for 7-10 days after if you need her help.

Why not compromise and say your mum one week after birth, then MIL one week after that?

[Northern_Shutterbug]

On a different note, I'm off for 9 days now. Going to hopefully be relaxing in some sunshine and good homely Spanish food (not where I grew up but my country!). I'll probably post occasionally, and definitely want to put a bump photo on with me in my maxi dress as I look huge!!

Good luck with all the scans everyone!!!

[Salsa]

Enjoy the time off Northern!!

[Thorz300]

Good morning ladies, just over 7 hours now!! How scary!

[Mel1983]

Good morning ladies, just over 7 hours now!! How scary!

Good luck thorz! Thinking of u! Very excited!