Problem with frequent bedding

[swish]

Hi! I was planning on dtd every day from af until a positive opk BUT dh is away for 2 nights on about cd 14 and 15, I usually o about cd 21. Does this matter? Should:
1 we dtd the morning before he goes and on cd 15 he releases whilst away (tmi). Does this matter if we miss one day in me?
2. We dtd using a condom until one attempt on day of pos opk? I'm worries this has really no chance of pregnancy and the one off attempt may be a one day cut off.
3. We do the above but abstain
4. Leave this cycle and try next - do not really want to do this because of horrible diet!!!!!
Any help much appreciated, thanks!

[zanacal]

Hi Swish - can he not just do it himself while he's away? That's 6 and 7 days before you O so you wouldn't have got pregnant then anyway.

I think I'm going to have DH do it himself until AF is finished, then use a spermicidal condom for 3 or 4 days then start doing it for real every day until I get a positive OPK. I think this will mean we do it 'for real' from around 4 days before O and stop some time (!) just before.

[Mochagirl]

Wow - you have long cycles, Swish! I O on CD12, which means I only have about 4-5 days between af and O. I think with your timing you'll be fine if he just releases on his own while he's away. In fact, and I could be completely wrong on this, but on IG I think I've read several times that dtd when it's not an actual attempt can raise testosterone unnecessarily - if that's the case (and someone please correct me if I'm wrong), you might be best to hold off dtd until closer to your O date anyway.

[swish]

Thank you girls!!!

[zanacal]

Wow - you have long cycles, Swish! I O on CD12, which means I only have about 4-5 days between af and O. I think with your timing you'll be fine if he just releases on his own while he's away. In fact, and I could be completely wrong on this, but on IG I think I've read several times that dtd when it's not an actual attempt can raise testosterone unnecessarily - if that's the case (and someone please correct me if I'm wrong), you might be best to hold off dtd until closer to your O date anyway.

I believe this to be the case too. In the end, I decided to actually DTD more because I want to get pregnant and we're doing so many things to lower the chances of a pregnancy (with antihistimines, gels, lowering sperm count) that I want to up the chances. I decided to use a spermicidal condom for a few days too because it may leave behind a little spermicide which may sway pink too (lots of *mays*!).

[Mochagirl]

I agree, zana - I plan to BD as much as possible, but since I have so few days between af and O, we're probably going to start dtd immediately and continue until I get a +OPK - it will only be 4-5 days anyway. I'm getting older, and I definitely want to get pregnant this month!! I just meant that if I had a long break between af and O like swish does, I might wait to start to actually dtd until closer to O since there's no way she could get pregnant anyway so far away from O. Does that make sense?

[zanacal]

It does

[swish]

Just checked back through my charts and actually this month I o on cycle day 18, probably different from other months because of vitex??? So now I really am confused as to what to do!

[Mochagirl]

That's one of the reasons I've avoided Vitex - I'm worried it will change my cycle and I won't know when to expect O! If you're really going to O on CD 18, I say dtd a couple of nights before he leaves, have him release the 2 nights he's away, then continue dtd when he gets back until your cut-off (you said you're going to stop at a +OPK, right?)

[swish]

Thanks mocha girl, yes, definately going to at positive opk