Maternal Dominance Hypothesis and Priviledged Daughter Hypothesis

[Tomgirl]

Lol I seem to be an exception in many ways. I have 3 boys all surprises, I have never been OCD about anything. I'm definitely more like Sloane, my attitude is whatever will be will be. The one aspect of my personality that I do think sways boy is I am super competitive...I always go 150% when it comes to sports but absolutely nothing else. It's the reason I stopped exercising cause I do compete with myself to get better, stronger, faster. So if I'm not working out then I am what I am.

Also I was a single mom for 10 years and did find that once my now husband moved in I did have some control issues over letting him handle roles within the house and with the kids as I had always done that. Now I have a sense of security and help that I never had so hopefully that will help my swaying pink.

I am the one in my family of 3 sisters that has made decisions that created drama and they saw as making mistakes and screwing up.. I've always just thought of it as I will try and if I fail I will pick myself up and keep going, but I think you said that trait sways blue? So I guess there are many factors that swayed blue for me. I'm just not full of anxiety or obsessed with controlling much. My husband is the neat freak always organizing. My motto is I won't look back on my death bed thinking I wish I would've cleaned more!

[Tomgirl]

Lol on second thought I have the general attitude of "anything you can do I can do better" which I'm sure sways blue! Darnit!!! My only hope is that I may think that but I wont actually want to put the effort in to prove that! haha

[atomic sagebrush]

TG I have noticed a definite trend where in families of all girls, particularly 3 girl families, they seem to have a propensity of little dudes! Not sure how or why but it's seemed to be the case for many families where 2 of the 3 girls have boy after boy, and then the other one has all girls. would love to have time and $$ to study this!

[TeacherMom]

Man. In my opinion, I feel like it is harder to go from the high testosterone characteristics to the low. I think it is harder to make yourself be less competitive. For me, I am competitive and like to influence others (in a good way though!) and I feel like holding that back would make me more testosterone driven because I will be frustrated...if that makes sense. I really feel like generally I am more of a Mary though overall. And I have a boy! :-)

[NCBeachyGrl]

I think maybe only big life events could make a big difference to us Marthas. I have this mentatlity that if I am going to do something, I better do it the best I can. When I am given a special project at work, I try to do it better than anyone. If I host a Thanksgiving or a Christmas, I go over the top to find the best recipes and cook the most I can, find the music, buy the best gifts, etc. If anyone has ever done Stregnths Finder (AS....this would be so cool to have swayers do), than it would make perfect sense that my top stregnth is Achiever.


But, this year we moved (only had 2 weeks to move to a different state), and I feel like everything I ever done went out the window. It took all I had to decorate for Christmas, we went out to eat for Thanksgiving, and I did nothing extra for anything! At work, I have become a procrastinator and unmotivated to do anything (at a bad time too when I just took a promotion). Heck, I even forgot I was off birth control and got pg...which is VERY unlike me.

I don't know if this will mean girl for me or not (prob. not!!), but I def. feel what it is like to be overwhelmed and focused on just getting by than focused on being the best.

[atomic sagebrush]

Man. In my opinion, I feel like it is harder to go from the high testosterone characteristics to the low. I think it is harder to make yourself be less competitive. For me, I am competitive and like to influence others (in a good way though!) and I feel like holding that back would make me more testosterone driven because I will be frustrated...if that makes sense. I really feel like generally I am more of a Mary though overall. And I have a boy! :-)

You DO NOT need to change or alter your personality for a sway and nor should you even try. It is not about changing yourself into a different person. It's accepting but not indulging the Marthaness - so your normal day to day stuff is fine, but you just avoid launching into things that aggravate it.

[atomic sagebrush]

Well, I do think it is important for us to stop pondering "does this make a difference?? does that??" because I believe this is different for everyone. It's not WHAT we do, it's the need for control over whatever arena that we prefer that sets the boy moms apart. For some of us, we may have a messy house and have chaos all around at home, but then at work we may be very highly focused. It's wanting that control around the things that are important to us and that we value that matters. Now, some boy moms do happen to want to control ALL aspects of life, others are ok in some arenas and not others, and then there are others who want and crave control but due to circumstance aren't able to attain it, but I believe they are still more blue-friendly than a person who doesn't ahve and doesn't want control (hope that makes sense.)

[Rainbow baby]

Hummm I am defiantly a Martha No amount of sedative is going to help me :/.. I need to be mentally stimulated and challenged so I won't go stir crazy lol I can see how it could be all linked up with other sway tactics like drinking, antihistamines, medications, and so forth...

I am not about to change anything because I can't control my thought and emotions ... so I am going to Mary this over....lol

[atomic sagebrush]

I don't want you guys to change who you are or even try, I am talking about controlling the things in your life that you DO have control over (such as not starting big huge projects, keeping busy, not obsessing over stuff) and then letting the rest go.

[Flowergirl]

Thank you Atomic, you're a little-bit-of-a lot-amazing for putting this together for us mummy's trying to shed our Martha-ness to realise our pinkie dreams.

I think it's not only important for our sways but a great life lesson that can influence our happiness and relationships throughout life.

I pray that God allows me to surrender and rest in His ultimate plan (and I pray that a little girl is part of that plan).

Flower x