Obsessing over swaying --- help!!

[daydrmbelievr]

No wonder I have two sons - I am a really obsessive person. Once my mind gets set to a tune, it's nearly impossible to change the station!
I have been trying out the LE diet (to some extent) for the past few weeks. I have decided to go vegetarian because I keep going over on protein numbers, and it was stressing me out.
Today is CD1 for my last month prior to TTC, so I went online and ordered repHresh and Sylk. I counted my OPKs to make sure I have enough for the next two months, then I read more info. Researched more. Worked out for 65 minutes. Logged in to MyFitnessPal for the umpteenth time.
Sadly, I have been suffering from insomnia for the past week or two, and I think my mind is on overdrive because of this sway.
I can't stop thinking about this sway! I can't stay off of forums, tracking apps, or recipe websites.

My question is... HOW DO I STOP? I can't let obsessing over this sway ruin my sway.

[Christi]

I am very similar with being a little obsessive. I have also been treated by a therapist for having a very specific form of OCD. I don't mean like the way everyone says colloquially that they have OCD, I mean the real diagnosable kind. Anyway, the treatment was to literally obsess about the thing I wanted to obsess about until I finally couldn't obsess over it anymore. For example, each day, I would "trigger" my obsession, obsess over it until my mind started to wander to other things, then I was supposed to force myself to continue obsessing until I finally couldn't obsess about it anymore. Over time, I simply couldn't obsess about it the way I could when I was trying to force myself to not obsess. It took me about 9 months of treatment, but it really did work. So, if you aren't currently ttc, I would let yourself obsess a bit until you feel you have exhausted yourself, then it will be easier to let it go when you are ttc.

My other suggestion is to find something else to obsess over. I've recently gotten into researching my family tree on ancestry.com which is super interesting and has plenty of things that I can obsess over without focusing on my sway.

Oh, and if you haven't done this yet, buy a personalized plan--letting atomic obsess over your sway will hopefully let you relax and just follow the instructions. I got a lot less obsessive after that. Good luck!


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[myurkanin817]

I would get a personalized plan... I got one but yes I am on this site.. Every single day for a few hours. BUT I do it bc I'm bored lol. I read everyone's sways and any info I can bc I generally interested in this I think bc I don't have any kids. Getting a plan takes the obsessive part away from the whole ttc part. It's makes it much easier to deal with. I do still go on my fitness pal to track my food intake... That's a good thing if ya ask me bc you know how much food you're eating. Not just for swaying purposes either. I'm heavy and to see how much I'm eating now compared to the way I used to eat still amazes me.

[Hopingforaprincess]

Yes a personalized plan (even if you don't purchase one atomic is VERY helpful along with the other ladies on the site)...and know that swaying isn't 100% but obsessing will not help.

[Hitmebabyonemoretime]

I love the idea of obsessing til you can't anymore. This will be me. But then I have some time. I figure at least 6 months of it. If you don't have time, I'd get the plan. I might get one if I can afford it (it's a 6 month plan, and it's way too early for me yet). But it's probably the best thing you can do.


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[daydrmbelievr]

The weird thing is that I'm really excited about the sway - regardless of the outcome, we are going to have a big family (three kids). What a blessing! I'm an only child, so I know that it will be so much fun, and so wonderful for the boys (and HOPEFULLY their little sister).
I have a background in nutrition, so I can basically look at foods and know what they're comprised of, so the diet isn't hard to figure out... BUT, I keep doubting myself which is driving myself nuts!
I am just so full of self-doubt, which is stupid. God has his will, and regardless of how my sway goes, His decision will override everything.

My sway in a nutshell:
- Vegetarian diet (I was protein-heavy when I conceived both boys). 40-60g protein, 30-40g fat on most days. 1400-1800 calories.
- Cardio 5-6x a week for an hour or more (including walks and gym time) - with both boys, I was a distance runner so I did a lot of interval training, long cardio workouts, and weights. Usually worked out 3-4x a week.
- No breakfast, just coffee with 2tbsp Coffee Mate (I have always been a breakfast eater, so this sucks, LOL!)
- Drinking 12+ ounces of milk a day (never been a milk drinker) along with fat free Yoplait
- Drinking a lot of aspartame (without caffeine) - I was a caffeine junky with both boys
- Will drink alcohol (sprits and wine) but not enough to get drunk. I did drink a lot more when I conceived the boys.
- NO vitamins or supplements (again, I was a huge vitamin and supplement junky with both boys)
- One attempt day before O (or with + OPK) - with DS1, no idea... DS2, we tried 2x in one day
- 1/2 tube of RepHresh the day before attempt, then 1/2 three days later
- Antihistamine day of attempt to dry up EWCM
- DH on cranberry and Licorice Root; vegetarian as well
- DH in hot tub, me with feet in immediately before attempt
- Sylk as lube during attempt
- I will probably not J&D since I think we're going to lower chances enough already

I feel like I have the bases covered, and what I previously did was swaying boy (although I didn't know it), so I should be 100% confident. Time to stop obsessing, right??

[Hopingforaprincess]

I have upped my coffee intake for my girl sway...I hardly drank coffee with my boys. And I was a huge milk drinker with all three, so I'm either completely cutting it or going skim (and still not drinking much). A couple of months before I conceived my third I was at the gym at least 6 days a week and was doing weights and taking supplements like creatine and whey...with my first and second son I didn't really work out (I weighed 115 when I got pregnant with my first so I was already pretty small).

For me I think it comes down more to diet, I always had three meals a day and snacked in between. I'm usually an active person so I will continue to do my 1 hour of cardio (and it won't hurt to lose a few more pounds)...like you said it's God's will and if it's meant to be it will be.

[atomic sagebrush]

My advice is to start off doing a super duper strict sway with the expectation that you will get BFN. Over time, you just get used to it and it doesn't become as obsession-worthy any more. I also recommend getting busy doing just about anything else - taking kids to park, visit your mom, read or start watching a tv series...anything that isn't this!!!

Waht I DON'T want you to do is suddenly start obsessing over the amount of obsesssion you are experiencing. If you feel

[atomic sagebrush]

Just wanted to remind you guys, I got a girl while I was on this site for 12 hours a day many days - it can still happen even if you are a bit of a "martha"

[atomic sagebrush]

I am very similar with being a little obsessive. I have also been treated by a therapist for having a very specific form of OCD. I don't mean like the way everyone says colloquially that they have OCD, I mean the real diagnosable kind. Anyway, the treatment was to literally obsess about the thing I wanted to obsess about until I finally couldn't obsess over it anymore. For example, each day, I would "trigger" my obsession, obsess over it until my mind started to wander to other things, then I was supposed to force myself to continue obsessing until I finally couldn't obsess about it anymore. Over time, I simply couldn't obsess about it the way I could when I was trying to force myself to not obsess. It took me about 9 months of treatment, but it really did work. So, if you aren't currently ttc, I would let yourself obsess a bit until you feel you have exhausted yourself, then it will be easier to let it go when you are ttc.

My other suggestion is to find something else to obsess over. I've recently gotten into researching my family tree on ancestry.com which is super interesting and has plenty of things that I can obsess over without focusing on my sway.

Oh, and if you haven't done this yet, buy a personalized plan--letting atomic obsess over your sway will hopefully let you relax and just follow the instructions. I got a lot less obsessive after that. Good luck!


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I agree with this - the WORST thing you can do is start trying to not obsess over something. You still do obsess over it but then it becomes a more built up thing in your mind and you end up sitting around panicking going "OMGOMGOMG I can't stop thinking about this!!!" You're going to think about it. It's important to you. DON'T panic when you do. just allow yourself to think aobut it and eventually you will have thought it thru to your heart's satisfaction and it will get kind of old hat.

But also DON'T do some ritualistic solution to alleviate feelings of obsession, either. This is what a lot of OCD people do - for some of them it's hand washing but there are many of us who formulate plans as a way to alleviate obsessiveness. I think typing up your sway for people to go over and tell you it's ok, is a kind of ritual that a lot of ladies do and it's not necessarily a good thing. It's fine to do it once, but then you gotta leave it there and say, "ok I have done my part, the rest is in God's or the universe's hands". NO ONE can ever be 100% confident, that's not how swaying works!!!

Your sway looks great, now let's "step forward in faith" and give it a try. Stricter is better this month and I"d still have you do a jump and dump. I'm not quite sure you're ready for BFP.