Preparing myself for the verdict

[atomic sagebrush]

I do agree it is harder for some han others for cultural reasons. NO offense meant, I just like to clarify it when the topic comes up for purposes of fostering international understanding, I suppose.

[purplepoet20]

Hey zivic... I wanted to sure this with you!

My maternal great grandmother was left to raise 3 girls in the 1930's. Her husband left when the last girl was born. I do not know the real reason why he left but my grandmother was told because he wanted a son. All 3 of the girls grew up to have strong son desires. My grandmother had 3 girls and with her fourth preg she somehow caused a miscarriage thinking it was a girl but it was a boy. She later went on to have a total of 6 living kids GGGBGG. Her son was spoiled beyond anything you could imagine. My grandmother even kept the the 2 youngest girls in their cribs all day until the older kids would come home from school and feed them or even change their diaper.

All the girls in that family had the same strong desire to only have sons... I learned not to long ago that my mother may have caused the death of my older sister when she was a month old. She left her alone to cry in a crib at a month old and the next morning she was blue. My mother had even ignored me and left me to cry in a crib while she was spoiling my older brother.

My mother's youngest sister abused me when I was 4y because I was a girl. She also abused her own kids GGGGGGGB and 4 of her kids were placed in foster care.

Because of everything in my family I was afraid to have or want a girl. Not because I didn't want one but because I was afraid I would abuse her. I know I would never hurt my children but after years of family abuse just for being a girl I felt it was in my blood.

It is sad what things can affect you for life. The things that people say or do. But no matter what in the end it is all about YOU.

I tell my husband all the time not to worry about what other think because they don't matter, all that matters is what we think. My DH went shopping with just the 3B's while I was cleaning the carpet and someone asked him if his wife left him after the baby was born... and told a little story about herself... my husband was so pissed he doesn't remember what else she said. He told her off and left the store without the groceries. He has a right to be upset what people say but in the end it doesn't matter because we love our kids.

[Peebell85]

Wow Purple, that is really eye opening... I'm so sorry you're family has had to go through such a tragic life. All because of gender... seems so ridiculous doesn't it..?!

[Rosie85]

What an awful story. I regret reading it.

[daydrmbelievr]

Man, I have two boys and I seriously cry (or feel a punch to the gut) whenever a friend has/announces a girl. It is so wrong and I know it, but I so fear never having a daughter. We are all so lucky to have Gender Dreaming to keep us sane during and after pregnancy

[daydrmbelievr]

me too!! Pink dust your way

[Zivic-Bubac]

Purple my dear friend, I'm so sad and sorry to hear you were abused as a young child
And about comment your DH got in the store: most of the people are suprisingly insensitive, which is more than annoying. My MIL asked me if we are going to sell 4th child if it's a girl. That was supposed to be a joke (??????) Hahaha.....

Today, for the first time during this pregnancy, I felt a joy for having another baby. I guess the hormones are kicking in...

[jmomof3girls]

Zivic, Did you ever get a confirmation ultrasound on the baby?

[3littleladies]

Z-B I know exactly what you're talking about when it comes to culture cause im serbian married to a croatian we live in australia, I dont have many serbian or croatian friends but I know the culture well. Growing up I heard my father on a few occasions say to my mum 'you couldn't even give me a son' & being the youngest it made me feel like he never wanted me cause I was another girl! I know this was a big reason why I really wanted my 3rd to be a boy, strange enough I felt like a failure to my father

Z-B try your best to not let ppls cruel comments get you down, hold your head up high & always know there's someone out there who would love to have a family like yours.