December 2WW

[maidentomother]

Happy, congrats! I see that and I only see proper lines.

XX, can't get over how similar we've been this cycle. However, I fear I'm out. Early afternoon I decided I would try to test with super concentrated urine since I hadn't drunk much. Well, as soon as I pulled my pants doen I noticed blood. Kind of a weird colour for me, in between red and brown. My spotting is usually brown; I do have cycles where I spot, sometimes for as many 4 days before AF, but typically the spotting is very light, often just like a beige-y tinge to my creamy CM. Oh and for whatever reason, I spot more often in hyperO cycles. But this was a lot heavier than my typical spotting. I wouldn't call it heavy, maybe 'medium' spotting. And I'm only 7DPO! All 6 times I've been pregnant I never had any spotting so I am not hopeful. Needless to say I didn't test; I will just wait for AF now. My LP is erratic and often short, as short as 8 days in the past years. I'm super worried stopping the Vitex is to blame. :/

[XXforhubby]

Happy- congrats! I am hoping for a healthy sticky bean!!!

Maiden- I am hoping that it is implantation bleeding! You said that it is different from your usual pre-AF spotting. I am keeping my FX for you!!

I am at peace with whatever happens. I am glad that things appear to be balancing out for me. Over the next few days I am going to try to get rid of excess clutter in my house (easier said than done!). We have a cozy home and cannot help having toys out, but in an organized manner. I am going to clear my house of any negative energy. I bought some white sage to burn, Tibetan cymbals, clear quartz and citrine crystals. I hope to do this before AF starts to begin a new cycle fresh and clear!

I better get started on my "homework" after nap time 😉!

GL ladies, for those with BFPs- may you have a healthy pregnancy, for those waiting- may you find peace and strength while you wait for positive opk of BFP!


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[MyByC]

Maiden, this is your implantation, you'll see! Let's just wait! Test Wednesday morning with digital test. Can't wait for update.
I have this feeling again that you will all get a BFP by Christmas..and new friends for me in January 😊

[Rosie85]

Been a while since I have logged on. Congrats to those with BFP's!

We have decided to forgo ttc for now. My husband applied for a promotion in Texas and if he gets it I don't want to be pregnant and sick while moving.

I did notice this month though that I didn't ovulate until cd18. I have 26-28 day cycles. Yikes.

[maidentomother]

XX, thank you for your optimism! I just LOVE your cleansing ritual ideal - I was into Wicca/paganism when I was younger and it's still of great interest and meaning to me. I have a huge crystal/semiprecious gemstone collection and also a hobby herbalist (both gardening & therapeutic use). Most recently, I've done some successful rituals with candles, visualization & vocalization using natural voodoo oils from sn awesome natural perfume company called Black Phoenix Alchemy Lab. Unfortunately I don't have my huge oil collection here - though I'm not sure I have the particular oils I'd need, probably I don't - or your idea would totally inspire me to do a fertility rite. I guess I'll have to order some though it will take a few months to get them, sigh. Maybe I can find them secondhand on ebay or the forums. If so, I'd be happy to do a ritual for you or anyone else on here who's interested. I'd just need a photo or a handwritten note to use as a focus. Thanks again for reminding me of the option!

MyByC, you are so sweet and so supportive, and I desperately hope your feeling is right! Thank you for the good energy. I only have some unknown quality cheap pregnancy test strips (2 different brands, at least one is 20miu sensitivity), 2 FRERs imported from England, 2 different early pregnancy tests I got at local German pharmacies, and 1 or maybe 2 CB digital - but it's not the more sensitive weeks estimator one, unfortunately, so I definitely won't test with it unless I get a BFP on something else first. Unfortunately, I'm really afraid to test now and I may just wait for AF, which may well come very soon anyway.

9 hours after I first noticed the spotting, I checked again and it seemed almost completely gone, just tiny traces of dull brown mixed with EWCM (again, after having EWCM yesterday). But then a few minutes later I felt a little gush, and wiped a small amount of totally brown blood mixed with CM. I'm hoping it's older blood and that gush was the last of the spotting. However, my mild cramping then started to rapidly increase until after an hour it got so bad I took some ibuprofen. The moderate-severe cramping and spotting make me very pessimistic, my only ray of hope is the EWCM since that's a true anomaly for me and I know it can be a good sign. I'm just so thankful I have you ladies online to talk to and I SO appreciate your listening and support. <3

[maidentomother]

Rosie, my cycles average 28-29 days and I O at all different times but CD18 is my average, so I wouldn't be too concerned though I know it's upsetting to have weird/different cycles especially if you're usually like clockwork. I hope DH gets the promotion, how exciting! Where in Texas would you move to and where do you live currently? Wishing you all the best with that & praying you conceive quickly when you desire to. I just KNOW your girl is out there, waiting to be united with her mama & family.

[XXforhubby]

Well Maiden the same thing happened to me about 6 hours after you had posted noticing brief, red spotting. I too feel that AF is coming. I am focusing on decluttering/cleaning house. Someone once told me if something is not happening for you, check to see if you have made room. I guess I am making room! Plus, it is keeping me occupied in a healthy way. I will only test now if AF is truly late or super light. I want to stay ignorant in case it is another chemical.


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[MyByC]

Maiden, thank you.
I was down..with my heart as little as a flea last 2 cycles when waiting for AF/BFP...was waiting every day...trying not to think, not to read, not to spot symptoms..but did all these and in the end, I asked God to send me AF or BFP and not to wait anymore.

I know perfectly how each of you feel, but only by staying positive we can go throw this. I am SURE that soon or later, for each of us BFP will come! Do not worry, not crying, not ruin your holidays.

I really hope you both get your BFP this cycle! It's your turn now.

[XXforhubby]

I think it is normal to get excited to try and while we wait. I think it is natural to be disappointed/ upset when AF comes. For some strange reason I am not even the least bit disappointed/sad to see my pre-AF spotting to herald another AF. Why? I'm not sure. I truly feel at peace with it taking the time that is needed to get my BFP. Maybe being preoccupied by doing something productive like clearing the space in my home has helped. All of us feel so much better!

GL to those waiting, may you find peace and strength!


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[Rosie85]

Thanks maiden! We currently live in Minnesota. We would be moving to Dallas Texas. So quite the move...opposite side of the country. It's really cold here right now so I'm really hoping my dh gets the job so i can get somewhere warm!