October Chit Chat!

[Inglewood]

Hi all! Not been on for a while as the dreaded sickness still consuming my days!!! I am 12wks today!! woohoo! and have my scan on thurs Might ask for a nub shot if the sonographer seems nice! I am off work sick as I have had a rotten cold for 10days now making my sickness worse. Reading ur comments on GD is like listening to my own voices in my head. I am so so sure this is ds no 3.... and I know I will get over it before he comes, whereas with ds2 I had the shock when he was born, that was tough. I wa so sure he was a girl as it was a completely diff pg to ds1. I was super sick 2nd time round and with ds1 I was in perfect health. This is my last baby, my 3rd c-section. Can't wait for my 20wk scan to ask the sex. I wanted to find out at 16wks privately, but Dh thinks it's best to find out at 20wks, then if a boy a 4d scan for confirmation, will be a good bonding scan and might help me accept another boy better, also we would take the boys to see their new wee brother, deep down I know he is right, it's the waiting that will be hard!

Sorry to hear a few of u are like me and sicky, I am so fed up, hoping it passes soon as I'm going out my mind at times. Dh is getting fed up listening to me, hasn't said it, but doesn't need to! I have both boys birthdays in the next 4wks and hope I can get thru the parties. I can't wait to eat something nice, meantime, I'm off to cook for the family while I sit with crackers and hot water

Take care xx

[DoulaMama]

Hola chicas!

DM, hun I'm so sorry about all that rockin' your world at once! That's just rough! Hugs to you, and hope you get happy news from the vet soon. Made me give my pup an extra cuddle; they really are like furry family.

I feel better these days. It's been almost 3 weeks since I found out DD3 is on her way and I'm starting to fully accept it; I didn't expect it to be this hard but I don't think I realized how fully entrenched my expectations of a son were. When it's something you've always wanted you almost come to believe the want is there precisely to be filled. Like you get hungry to remind you to eat. It's like I thought the longing was there to encourage me to TTC #3, because it would be this boy I always wanted, LOL. So it's been tough to realize that the dream wasn't a premonition it was just a dream, but I'm getting there. I can't say I feel thrilled at the prospect of another girl but I'm no longer devastated so we're making big progress Feeling her kick in my belly doesn't make me upset anymore. There are even days, like today, where I'm not sure it even matters at all... why was it ever such a big deal anyway? It never has been to my DH and I wish it never had been to me.

Thanks Hun She's doing really well now, thanks. It was caught by us so early that her recovery was very fast and smooth...thank goodness. It's been an insanely long week of bleaching and spraying our house with viruscide....Ugh. Just what a pregnant woman wants to do...while looking after 3 children. I had to do it though because this virus lives for months inside the house...and years in the soil. So when we get our second puppy, the virus has to be gone before she's on the property. What a mess. The breeder wasn't very knowledgeable about keeping people and dogs away from her new puppy's either so no wonder they came down with this.

I'm so happy to hear that you are feeling better about girlie number 3 I don't know if it would make you feel better...but 3/4 girls is my DREAM family makeup. I am so jealous of all girl families. My hubby wouldn't have cared either way, so having a boy wasn't something that he needed. I just figured that out of 4 children...I would definitely have a girl in there somewhere. Boy was I wrong. I also wanted to tell you about a convo I had with a check out lady in our grocery store..of all places....She asked if I was hoping for a girl. I told her that it would be nice but I'm not holding out much hope. She then told me that she had BBBG and that she was ecstatic that she FINALLY got her girl. She then told me that she always thought she would have the closest relationship with her daughter for obvious reasons, but that she was WAY closer to her third son(the one she was disappointed about having, at first). She said that he's 28, has a great girlfriend, went to college close to home, chose to live close to her and comes over for dinner twice a week with his girl, helps with her yard/building stuff etc. She kinda got teary eyed and said that he was her soul child. I cried! It was so beautiful and it made me really think about my gender wishes. xoxo Love to you~~~

DM so sorry to hear about your grandma and also your little puppy. My sweet german shepherd got this virus and also had to stay on IV for several days, but he got better and lived to an old age so I'm sending you positive vibes! I felt so guilty cause I was in college and decided I would save money and vaccinate him myself buying it at our local feed store. well, I think I didn't do a great job or maybe didn't store the vaccine correctly. either way, the guilt was horrible but luckily he survived.
Mocha and Begonia--I feel your pain. Swaying makes it harder to accept! I'm so stuck about finding out the sex now. My gut tells me it's a girl because I want it to be a girl. I never cared before cause I always knew we would have 4 kids and I mainly wanted boys, but this is the absolute last for us. I can't sanely handle 5 kids and be 100% present in their lives the way I am now. So this is it! Should I find out? I'm about 19 weeks and my doc keeps telling me I gotta schedule the U/S. To top it off, we want the kids in the room to see the baby and I can't decide. In my mind, I thought if they say boy, DH and I will keep it a secret and tell people we didn't find out. I really don't wanna hear any remarks from family and friends. But now that we will have the boys come I'm not sure what to do. Aghhh I have been losing sleep over this. MIL calls all the time asking when will we know. I keep saying I'm not sure I'm gonna find out and I can just hear the pause and disappointment.--Sorry to vent!

I have a question....When did you feel baby movements? I still feel nothing! my OB isn't concerned but I clearly remember flutter movements by 16 weeks. I lay on my belly and I still don't feel anything. Sometimes I think it's my imagination and I feel things but I mainly think it's just gas LOL! Oh well, I heard the heartbeat last week so I'm just gonna stop the paranoia.

Thanks GG! It is a terrible virus hey?! Holy dina, I had no idea how bad it was until I did some research and then I couldn't sleep a wink that night
About finding out...could you pull the u/s tech aside and tell her that you want her to have a peak, write it down on a slip of paper and then give it to you before you leave? That way you can do what ever you want with the info. You could keep it a secret, or do a big surprise party with cake(revealing the gender) or just let everyone know.
Oh and about movement...do you know if you have a posterior or anterior placenta? I found that with my second I had movement really early...like 12 weeks and then nothing until 20. I had an anterior placenta though. Just a thought. Oh and the more kids you have, the bigger your uterus gets and the harder it is to feel them until the fill the space a bit I wouldn't worry too much at all Hugs~ xo

I'm doing ok - my midwife booking in appointment is on Thursday so I should get my scan date this week too. I'm looking so fat, it's going to be difficult to conceal this for another 3 or 4 weeks!

YAY! So exciting! Can't wait to hear about your appt. and your scan date!!! Woohoo! PLus, happy belated Bday to your DS!

I have a u/s tomorrow to see if the SH has gone. Can't wait to see my gummy bear!

Keeping my fingers crossed that the SH is gone Foxy~~ xoxo

Honestly until I came to these boards I never realized how many women (and even their DH's) DO want daughters, which might seem totally crazy, but since I wanted sons so badly I couldn't imagine why anyone would want what I have. I thought about starting a thread but was worried it could make people sad, or turn into gender-bashing (though that seemed more frequent on IG) ... but I think it would be good for us girl moms to hear why boy moms wanted girls, and good for the boy moms to hear why we girl moms envy your having sons.

Start the thread!!! I would totally post and tell you my thoughts on why I wanted girls. I know some of it may be silly but it's nice to get it off my chest. PLus it's nice to see why moms want boys as some days I think that I'm cursed Boys are not easy to raise in my books...and it makes the GD even harder.

Hi all! Not been on for a while as the dreaded sickness still consuming my days!!! I am 12wks today!! woohoo! and have my scan on thurs Might ask for a nub shot if the sonographer seems nice! I am off work sick as I have had a rotten cold for 10days now making my sickness worse. Reading ur comments on GD is like listening to my own voices in my head. I am so so sure this is ds no 3.... and I know I will get over it before he comes, whereas with ds2 I had the shock when he was born, that was tough. I wa so sure he was a girl as it was a completely diff pg to ds1. I was super sick 2nd time round and with ds1 I was in perfect health. This is my last baby, my 3rd c-section. Can't wait for my 20wk scan to ask the sex. I wanted to find out at 16wks privately, but Dh thinks it's best to find out at 20wks, then if a boy a 4d scan for confirmation, will be a good bonding scan and might help me accept another boy better, also we would take the boys to see their new wee brother, deep down I know he is right, it's the waiting that will be hard!

Take care xx

I'm so sorry you feel like crap. FX'd it ends in a few weeks, Hun. I too was shocked when DS3 came out a boy. I was SOOOOO sure that he was a girl. I do not want that shock at my last birth. I love the entire labour/birth portion and with this being my last experience, I do not want to taint it with the possibility of GD at the birth. So, I'm gearing up to hear "boy" soon but that's ok. I will be ok and I will love my son Good luck on a nub shot!! Can't wait to see it!!! xo

BLUE- I hope you're doing well! xoxo

AFM....I'm feeling great! Other than the constant clean up and crazy kids, it's been ok here lately. I found my DS2 downstairs yesterday with a lip tint that my mom had accidently dropped under the couch..I guess he found it and decided to write EVERYWHERE with it. Couches...carpet...walls...tv...wood furniture...toys....and after all the cleaning that I did recently for this doggy virus. I almost buried him in the backyard. This is when my GD really hits..I have this weird idea in my head that girls aren't destructive...I'm guessing that's not true...right?
Anyway....as far as my scan....I have 2 choices. I am going to visit my close gf for 2 weeks and will be driving through and stopping in a town that has a fancy high res. u/s. On the way down I'll be 15w3d....and the way back I'll be 17w3d. Which would you choose??? I have to book it soon....just not sure if 15w3d would be too early? I could do both I guess....but if 15w is cutting it close then I'll wait the 2 extra weeks.
Thanks for any thoughts!!!

[begonia]

DM I'd wait the extra 2 weeks! If you were going to be 16 weeks you'd have a decent shot (DD2 I found out at 16+2) but earlier than that I'd have a hard time feeling 100% confident in either guess. You definitely can get a good GUESS at that gestation but if you're looking for closure, 17+ is just about as accurate as 20w.

Re: your destructive little guy, well ... LOL my DD2 and him would have had a FINE time together! DD1 was not into any of that, she's my tomboy in terms of her clothing style/toy preferences, but behaviorally is pretty darned easy. I tell her not to do something and she doesn't do it, whether I'm there watching her or not. DD2, if she hears me say not to do something .. well by all means she MUST try it. If it's just the 2 of us home and I need to shower, I lock her in the bathroom with me and don't take my eyes off her for a second Oh man I have a friend whose DD dumped out an entire gallon of milk and then broke a dozen eggs onto a carpeted floor! So ... little girls can be destructive too. Hope that makes you feel a bit better about that.

Weirdly it is nice to hear that your dream family would be lots of girls, I do appreciate it I really hope you get one! And oh that convo in the supermarket! I had a similar one with a friend who has BBG. She was PRAYING for that G; they did shettles and lucky for her it "worked." Her kids are all older elementary, so nowhere near grown, but similar to that lady in the market she said her second son is her soul-mate child. She's so happy to have her girl for dance class and dresses, etc ... but she said she thinks her DS2 is going to be the one who she ends up closest to as adults.

AND I think those of us that are blessed with both the ability and desire to have more than 2 kids really improve our odds of having at least one child who we end up having a great, lifelong relationship with, KWIM? If we had stopped with DD1 I think DH would have really missed out, because he and DD2 have a connection that is definitely going to be a tight one forever. You can see it already. It's such a good reminder to me that it REALLY is about the relationship and not the gender. My DD1 would have been a disappointment to many mom's hoping for a girl; she hasn't worn a dress in 3 years, she only wants to play legos or superheros, she won't go anywhere near a princess toy and couldn't be paid to go to dance class. But she's just perfect for me

Purple I hope you hear pink at 20 weeks! I hear you on the finding out v. not finding out. We weren't going to find out with this one (well, DH still isn't and doesn't know that I did) and even with the GD, I am BEYOND thankful I found out because I really, really thought this was a boy. I would have been very disappointed at the birth. In love, obviously, but my shock and disappointment would have clouded the day without a doubt. At least now I can go in there with my head wrapped around holding another sweet little girl Which is what DH expects anyway so he won't be disappointed ... but man, it would have been the best surprise ever to give him a son. Can't think like that though! Those are exactly the thoughts that I need to keep working on getting out of my head ...

And you mentioned getting another scan to help bond if it's a son; I think that's a great idea. We have a scan next week and I think it's going to be really great for me. And if around 30 weeks I'm still struggling I'll probably book a 3d/4d myself, just for me to see her again and remind me to enjoy my last few months. I'm with you DM, I really do love L&D and want this last one to be an amazing experience, physically and emotionally

[DoulaMama]

Thanks B! Off to book it!!! The official date will be....Nov 12th 25 days and counting down!! Yay!!

So...another Q for you gals.....

I will have my hubby and 3 kids with me(hubby is flying to meet me to help me with the drive home as it might be very snowy conditions on the drive home). I'm going to request that I go in for my scan by myself as it's only a 10min appt and he thinks I'm looking at my placenta, if there's one or two, etc. What if he insists that he come in with me!! EEK! What if(or should I say when)I hear boy...will I lose it in front of him?? Should I get it written down and then look later? The thing is I would like to look at the screen to make sure that I SEE a boy or GIRL. Ugh. What a disaster. I guess I have to believe it's a boy before I go in and then I won't be shocked at all and I'll be ok for the remainder of the 8 hour drive home..... LOL

Thank you for your stories about destucto-girls LOL It helps to hear them as I only have friends with very well behaved, relaxed, quiet little girls.
xoxo

[begonia]

OH DM that will be hard! As hard as it would be to sit on it for the drive home, I'd lean towards having them write it down so you can have a private moment later. Maybe even call ahead and see if they can make a note in your appointment booking that you want it done that way, so you don't have to fuss about what to do if DH comes in, etc.

DH just found out he has to be out of town for our u/s on Monday morning. Which is OK with me; I'll get to have a nice quiet few minutes with the baby and me. FX I enjoy it and don't get upset all over again. I'm really glad we decided not to "find out" because I don't want to have to tell everyone it is another girl. I'd rather deal with the occasional "maybe this is your boy!" comments than people awkwardly congratulating us on it being "another" girl, KWIM? People never know what to say to #3; I certainly don't ... when people only have one and find out they're having another of the same gender, I think it's easy to be like "How fun to have a sister/brother pair! They will love growing up together!" and mean it. But with 3?!? It sounds forced, at least to me, for people to say they are happy for you. That'll be much easier to do once she's here and is the most gorgeous baby in the whole wide world DH also thinks its a girl and agrees it'll be way more fun to hear that at birth than it would be to have another potty shot, LOL.

[DoulaMama]

B- I'm keeping my fingers and toes crossed that you'll have a wonderful ultrasound and enjoy looking at your sweet baby girl xoxo

WELL......I have a new development here on the u/s front. I've got a "dating" scan(LOL! I know exactly when I O'd so this is just for me wanting to see what's going on in there)booked for Friday at 2:45pm!! 2 days!! EEK! I'll be 14w2d. Not sure if that's too late for a nub shot or not but I don't care. I really want to see baby, where my placenta is, etc and for $20 they will record the session on CD(I believe that is what she said...although she could have meant record the pics on the CD...not totally sure). I may bring my video camera and record it if they aren't going to. I'll post it and see what you guys think Anyway....totally psyched!!!

[Mochagirl]

Woohoo! I'm glad you got an u/s booked, DM! I can't wait to see the pictures!

Not much going on here - the m/s never surfaced as badly again - just some mild nausea when I wake up and whenever I get hungry, but nothing to complain about. I think maybe it was just really bad that day because of how little sleep I'd had. So far this pregnancy is way easier than my other two - though I never had really bad m/s, it was definitely worse than this.

My bloating has gone from just a evening thing to an ever-present thing. Surely it's too early to be showing, right? I have a firm little belly that really makes me look preggers. Luckily I haven't outgrown any of my jeans from my skinny days yet, mostly because they're all low rise and my belly sits above the waistband.

[Mochagirl]

Oh, and purplefairy...I loooove your idea about booking a 4D scan after the 20 week ultrasound to help me bond with the baby - particularly if it's another boy. My older boys have never been to an ultrasound, and it would be fun to go as a family to see their new baby brother or sister. I think it would help me get over the initial shock of hearing boy and would help me start the process of getting over my GD.

[DoulaMama]

Mocha- It may be baby belly already!!! Or you're having twins again... JK!!!! I started the bloating at 5w...and it never went away...so here I am in maternity pants at 14w although I've only gained 3lbs which is nice. Even with a small weight gain though, my pants are about 3 inches from buttoning up! Yikes!

So..after looking at this website it might be ok to have a profile shot...??? Or is the chart on that page in weeks of fetal growth... 14 weeks from O...14 weeks from LMP? ....Hmmmm
http://www.baby2see.com/gender/study_ultrasound.html

[Mochagirl]

Or you're having twins again... JK!!!!

I won't pretend that thought hasn't gone through my head...I remember I showed a little early with ds3 and I was worried I was having twins then too. Later dh told me that he secretly wanted it to be twins again just because it would be really cool to be a family with two sets of twins. Ha! I guarantee that this time, though, he would probably have a heart attack if it was twins. We can barely afford 4 kids as it is - what would we do with 5??

Oh, and bravo on only gaining 3 lbs, DM. I've gained between 6 and 10 lbs depending on the day - probably something in between, like 8 lbs...and I'm half as far along as you!