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  1. #341
    Dream Vet
    GirlieCat's Avatar
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    So I am confused...shortly after I announced, my mom said she wanted to throw me a baby shower. I said okay but that we wanted it at our house. She thought that was weird and we should have it somewhere else but we just bought a nice house a year and half ago and it is great for gatherings so why go rent a place when our house is good (no one else in the family has a house big enough to host it). She also thought it was weird that we wanted it co-ed for hubby's friends and a BBQ theme- like casual, not really baby shower.

    Anyway she has been stressing about details and we have been talking about what I want in terms of colors and theme but then all of sudden she asked yesterday if I am going to be paying for everything, like food and supplies. Ummm....I guess I thought if she was hosting the party for me (even if it is at my house) that she would pay for stuff. If I am going to pay for all the supplies then what part of it is "her throwing me the shower". I hate conflict but I don't know what to say to her.
    Pregnant with baby GIRL #2, due August 2019
    Successful girl sway, born in 2017.

  2. #342
    Moderator
    XXforhubby's Avatar
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    I would just say it like it is but very gently- you don't want to make things worse but you need to be clear.

    I would say you apologize for throwing her for loop by wanting the party at your house. Explain to her your reasonings for wanting it there. Also, let her know your DH is excited to be a first time parent and wanted to be involved too. His friends are equally excited for him and you didn't think it was a big deal to include them. Let her know that while this may not be a "traditional" baby shower, this is how everyone could be included. I would tell her that she most definitely can still plan the party, etc. If she doesn't want to pay for things, then you will take over the planning.

    It's hard when people's expectations don't fit the reality of things. It seems your mom had an idea of what a baby shower should be, without taking you and your personality into consideration.

    Hang in there!


    [emoji170]8/2010 [emoji170]6/2013 [emoji170]11/2015 [emoji170]
    [emoji178]Baby Girl [emoji254]EDD 9/30/2017 [emoji178]


  3. #343
    Hi, I'm a bit late to join this forum... we did a kinda sorta pink sway (Rephresh + 3 day cutoff) and the 21 week scan indicated that it's a girl. Waiting for confirmation from a 4D elective scan at the beginning of June before I get too excited, because after three boys, I'm really struggling to believe that the tech got it right! It seems altogether too surreal to have turned up the other side of the coin after four pregnancies and nearly seven years...

    Edited to add: baby numero quattro is due August 28th.
    July 2010
    September 2012
    November 2014
    August 2017

    Our perfect family!!!

  4. #344
    Big Dreamer

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    Quote Originally Posted by nearlyalegume View Post
    Hi, I'm a bit late to join this forum... we did a kinda sorta pink sway (Rephresh + 3 day cutoff) and the 21 week scan indicated that it's a girl. Waiting for confirmation from a 4D elective scan at the beginning of June before I get too excited, because after three boys, I'm really struggling to believe that the tech got it right! It seems altogether too surreal to have turned up the other side of the coin after four pregnancies and nearly seven years...

    Edited to add: baby numero quattro is due August 28th.
    Congrats on your little girl and welcome
    I'm in the same boat. I was told girl at my morphology scan after 4 boys, but Bub didn't cooperate at my 28 week 3d scan so I've got to wait another 6 weeks 6 days to find out for sure lol




    successful sway 2017
    successful sway 2019
    baby girl #3 due mid 2023

  5. #345
    Quote Originally Posted by Mummyof4boys View Post
    Congrats on your little girl and welcome
    I'm in the same boat. I was told girl at my morphology scan after 4 boys, but Bub didn't cooperate at my 28 week 3d scan so I've got to wait another 6 weeks 6 days to find out for sure lol
    Ah, sneaky baby! It's exciting but excruciating at the same time; I want to go mad buying pink (the day after my scan I was in the infant girl section at a local department store and I swear I was like Maria Von Trapp coming over the hill, lol), but there's this niggle in the back of my mind going... wait... wait until you KNOW because otherwise it could be a lot of expense for no reason :/ Hopefully we both got skilled techs who know their stuff!
    July 2010
    September 2012
    November 2014
    August 2017

    Our perfect family!!!

  6. #346
    Big Dreamer

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    Quote Originally Posted by nearlyalegume View Post
    Ah, sneaky baby! It's exciting but excruciating at the same time; I want to go mad buying pink (the day after my scan I was in the infant girl section at a local department store and I swear I was like Maria Von Trapp coming over the hill, lol), but there's this niggle in the back of my mind going... wait... wait until you KNOW because otherwise it could be a lot of expense for no reason :/ Hopefully we both got skilled techs who know their stuff!
    Haha! Ive barely bought anything 'just in case', but my mother has bought a ridiculous amount of girly stuff!

    At the morphology scan the US tech pointed out the girly bits, but I didn't know what I was looking at LOL. It didn't look anything like boys bits and I've seen plenty of those over the years hahaha! But there's always that doubt in my mind and hard to imagine not being just a boy mum.




    successful sway 2017
    successful sway 2019
    baby girl #3 due mid 2023

  7. #347
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    GirlieCat's Avatar
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    Welcome Nearly!!

    Mummy I think that is funny you haven't bought much but your mom has...that is the same for me. Even the things we did register for are not "girly". I am confident it is a girl, but I am just not into pink and pretty. Our swing, bouncer, play pen, car seat, stroller...all those bigger items are grey. We wanted gender neutral so we can use them again if need be.

    Third trimester is proving to be pretty hard on me emotionally. First trimester theme was throwing up...second trimester was smooth sailing and forgot I was even pregnant most of the time...third trimester has been all emotions and getting fat. I cry just about every day which is so unlike me so I hate it. I was so stable and strong emotionally the first 30 weeks so this is coming as a real surprise to be so unstable. It is causing issues in my marriage and at work but I am doing my best. Talked to doc and she has no concerns of actual depression, just thinks it is normal hormones.

    Just about 7 more weeks to go and now I really don't care if I am ready or prepared...I just want time to go by fast so I can get this over with. Looking forward to my baby showers in the coming weeks so I know what I still need to buy and can feel a bit more prepared. Hind sight, I should have done the shower by the 32/33 week mark instead of the 35/36 week mark, but it is what it is. Hope everyone else is doing good.
    Pregnant with baby GIRL #2, due August 2019
    Successful girl sway, born in 2017.

  8. #348
    Big Dreamer

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    GirlieCat, sorry you're feeling crap. I didn't get any relief in the second trimester, felt sick from 5 weeks just want it to be done with! 5 weeks 6 days to go...I feel bad wishing away this pregnancy but I'm having a hard time enjoying it when I feel so sick, tired and sore! And I feel guilty for having such a short fuse with the kids lately




    successful sway 2017
    successful sway 2019
    baby girl #3 due mid 2023

  9. #349
    Dream Vet

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    Due June/July/August 2017 (2)

    I seems like many of us are miserable and feeling like crap. For me this pregnancy has also been a challenge in terms of fatigue, nausea, weight gain, crappy nightsleep, indisposition & overall exhaust. In the end of the day I collapse like I have been doing a marathon. I feel like I am 70 years. Thank God there is only six weeks left and I can quit my job in two weeks and go on maternity leave. Wishing all of you ladies strenght & good spirit in the final spurt of your pregnancies.

    Happy baby shower, GirlieCat. Wish you a jolly day.


    Mother to 3 boys ❤️ and pregnant with a baby girl due in June 2017 [emoji120]. DW (42) [emoji1326] DH (40) [emoji144]
    Last edited by Dreamsister; May 3rd, 2017 at 03:52 AM.
    3 beautiful & now pregnant with a baby girl due June 2017

    Thank you everyone in this site and in particular Atomic for amazing support during my sway. I am for ever grateful.

  10. #350
    Big Dreamer

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    38 days til due date...but who's counting lol. Hope like hell I don't go overdue like last time ugh! Feel like total shit




    successful sway 2017
    successful sway 2019
    baby girl #3 due mid 2023

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