Would like some advice pls

[hopper]

Hi hopper I also had an opposite last year- ds2 was born December 2016. I'm swaying again now and hoping to start ttc in September. I am trying to avoid the swaycessing I did last time too. I think your plan sounds really smart! Clomid, exercise, one attempt, vegetarian, coffee and fasting between meals are the best tactics I've seen on this site so you are really in a great place if you can do them!
Wishing you all the pink luck in the world xx

Oh maybe we could end up on the same DDG!! Best of luck with your sway!! And congrats on your DS2, mine is kerrrrrrazy but so darn lovable lol!

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[hopper]

^^^What she said!! I too had a sway opposite with my DS3. It was due to my total undoing- I was the swaycessing queen, haha!!

Your plan Hopper is exactly what brought me the DD I'm currently pregnant with. Just remember, if it takes you awhile to conceive, don't drop anything or change anything that is getting good results. Change up the stuff that doesn't sway, like jump and dump, lube, etc. Just keep on keeping on. Also, don't sweat the curve balls life will throw at you! Just keep on doing what you can manage. I couldn't keep up the exercise due to the stress of my DS3 needing surgery and only sleeping 3-5 hours a night the 7 weeks before my BFP. I also needed a 4th small snack due to the stress I was under. The point I'm trying to make is, take things as they come and just always do the best with what you are given. I'm a firm believer that this is the attitude girl mom's have that us all boy mom's desperately need!!

You can do this! Trust me!!


[emoji170]8/2010 [emoji170]6/2013 [emoji170]11/2015 [emoji170]
[emoji178]Baby Girl [emoji254]EDD 9/30/2017 [emoji178]

Thanks XX!! I'm aaaaaaalllllll about that illusive girl mom attitude! Trying to aim for it, ridding myself of negative people Who tend to make me worse and focusing on my DH and 3 sons so it's helping!! Fingers crossed I can be just like you but if not and it's DS4 for us then I'm actually ok with that. Never thought I'd be at this point with GD but I think I'm overall a lot more at peace than ever before. I have triggers but not to the same extent at all! It's actually amazing this sense of contentment my newest lil dude has brought me!!
I'm sorry to read you had such a stressed out time with your DS3, I hope he's ok now xxx

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[hopper]

This makes me so jealous. I miss my coffee, fitting in my jeans and not stuffing my face 24/7. But it will be worth it for another baby, and even more so if I finally get my boy. Here, take ALL my pink dust! Hope you get your girl, it looks like you're making (what I would consider) the most important changes.

Oh PLEASE take every last bit of blue dust I have!! If it helps at all I'm a big carnivore by nature. Every meal had meat. Rare steak is my fave dinner! And I could eat biscuits and crisps til they come out my ears. I'm lucky I have a fast metabolism (thanks dad lol!)

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[hopper]

What specifically did you not like about e4d?

No, you can't just have one attempt when you usually O. That won't work. There is no other option, it's either e4d/e3d or else OPK. Or, you can just let hubby set the pace and DTD when he wants but that is a huge gamble on the Clomid.

Fine to go onto vitamins for now, cut back to 3x a week at some point prior to TTC. Don't just drop them, cut back for a while and then wean off eventually or even just keep going at 3x a week if you think you need them. I like you guys to do 1200-1600 mcg folic acid or better yet folate (more expensive though)

exercise, that's good.

As a general rule once a person has had a failed sway I have them switch over to PCO-type diet. I understand if you can't do that though. What about Weight Watchers? Will he catch onto that? We've had decent success with WW as a sway diet so I think that may be a good compromise.

yes fiber still recommended

Go easy on the weight loss, pace yourself with that.

Lack of sleep can definitely help sway pink!

12 weeks on diet = good results, the WW option included.

For whatever reason that 3rd boy is what gets so many of us. I had way less GD with my 4th boy than my 3rd.

Thanks for the reply Atomic!

With regard to e4d I think it felt very regimented. Is it ok to dtd protected whenever we like (currently Zoloft has my sex drive at below zero but I'm hoping it gets better!) And just "pull the goalie" when I get an OPK? And as for OPKs if I go with using the CB digital ones is it best to wait for the solid smiley or go ahead on the flashing one? Or maybe that's a bad idea when the Clomid makes things so unpredictable!!

I actually was wondering if I should ask you about the PCOS diet. How would I know if I have a tendency towards PCOS? And what are the main differences between the regular LE diet vs the PCOS version?

Stealth isn't my strong suit. DH has copped on already that I've changed my diet. He's only perceptive when it suits him I tell you!! Anyway I am gone veggie now as a result. Day 2 and feeling good!

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[hopper]

Yes that's fine not to do OPK in the months between now and TTC! Just want to be sure you're not taking Clomid in months you aren't TTC, right?

The Zoloft should help with OCD.

No not taking it outside of actively ttc. I actually must fill the script to have it to hand!!

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[hopper]

So I'm on day 2 of my lifestyle change but think I will be a skeleton if I do it for too long.
I ate 1325 cals today (that was 44g protein and 37g fat) Did 64 minutes on stationary bike travelling around 28.5KM. According to MFP I will lose over 10lbs in 5 weeks if I keep that up. I ate 3 meals, no snacks, 3 coffees, glass of wine. Feel full to be honest. Should I fast for less time (15 ish hours today between tea last night and breakfast today) or add I'm a 4th small meal to keep up cals til closer to ttc?

Sorry for all the questions. Swore I wouldn't do this but would like to get it straight in my head before ttc xxx

ETA I'm 128lbs and 5'5 presently. Was at 121 when I conceived DS3. I checked MFP and it's telling me I actually got down to 118lbs about 5 weeks before we got our BFP so I was wrong before when I said 121 was my lowest adult weight!

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[atomic sagebrush]

Reading through this thread a few questions came to mind:

1. There's talk of "undoing" of a sway - is that due to obsessing over every detail? What should I avoid? I'm trying to get a solid plan so I can chill and just do the light diet and cardio everyday, adding coffee [emoji37] and hubby is running and biking too. I tend to go through waves of type A personality when I get fixated on something and then some periods of time when I'm more type B and super chill about stuff. Haha.

2. Clomid... I'm assuming you can only get it if you have had a long time trying without being able to get pregnant? It's bad to take or it will overstimulate your ovaries or something? I feel like everyone on here has taken clomid or femara to get girls haha.


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Please go and reread the answer I gave in this thread, pg. 2 about what NOT to do.

The people who go over and over everything with a fine tooth comb and post or send me a message every day about something either that they have read and now need to know how to incorporate it or why not to and/or about things that happened in 2007 that they can't stop thinking about because surely it means their sway will fail and/or who have sequestered themselves in a dark room (because, Vit. D, ya know) and do nothing and go nowhere because they may have to eat a forbidden food and/or who make up these big complex schedules where every hour of every month for 3 months straight is planned down to the minute (and they actually FOLLOW it!) and/or who test everything possible to test like their temperature and pH and blood and urine and sweat and tears and fly into a panic when it varies even only slightly and/or who go on for 9 months refusing to drop even the most reasonable of things and then all of a sudden have convinced themselves they are dying of low B12 and have completely ruined their fertility and now have to suddenly do everything to end up swaying blue, etc, etc, etc. Those are the things not to do. I can almost, but not quite (because if I could tell this, I'd warn people) pick out the people who are in danger of failed sways because of this stuff.

But DO NOT take this to mean that you have to freak out and panic if you do feel a little uptight about swaying because all that is, is replacing stressing over swaying with stressing over stressing. It's the same darn thing. So you have to say, of course I will feel nervous about this. It's important to me. But people get girls every day of the year not doing any of this deliberate stuff I'm doing and at the end of it all I'm going to turn this over to a higher power or to the universe because I know I've done the doable and trying to do any more than that, will only turn me into a control freak and mess with my sway anyway. And then get out of your house, off the computer, see a movie and go out to dinner and have a cheat.

2) Clomid. No, not everyone is on Clomid. Not even close. I didn't use Clomid when I got my girl. But it is fine to take even if you don't strictly need it. Interestingly it's actually more likely to overstimulate the gals who really DO need it to conceive - those with moderate to severe PCO - than the rest of us. You need to get it from a doctor and they typically won't prescribe it unless a person has need for it, meaning they are not ovulating regularly or have a short LP or just aren't geting pregnant after several months or years of trying.

[atomic sagebrush]

Thanks for the reply Atomic!

With regard to e4d I think it felt very regimented. Is it ok to dtd protected whenever we like (currently Zoloft has my sex drive at below zero but I'm hoping it gets better!) And just "pull the goalie" when I get an OPK? And as for OPKs if I go with using the CB digital ones is it best to wait for the solid smiley or go ahead on the flashing one? Or maybe that's a bad idea when the Clomid makes things so unpredictable!!

I actually was wondering if I should ask you about the PCOS diet. How would I know if I have a tendency towards PCOS? And what are the main differences between the regular LE diet vs the PCOS version?

Stealth isn't my strong suit. DH has copped on already that I've changed my diet. He's only perceptive when it suits him I tell you!! Anyway I am gone veggie now as a result. Day 2 and feeling good!

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1)It's ok but it is not gonna help boost your odds of conception any. The issue is, people don't always GET OPK and/or may have false positive ones and that's the benefit of the e4d is that you're covered in that case. What I'd suggest instead is to possibly aim at positive OPK but be sure you have unprotected sex one time a week in addition to waiting around for the pos OPK to come. Your O day may change with Clomid so that way, even though it would be a bit of a longshot with some luck involved, it would still be possible to luck your way into success even if you don't get a pos OPK OR if you got one, but didn't actually O, and then did O a week later or whatever. Would NOT need to be regimented or scheduled at all, just whenevs.

2)I like anyone who's had a sway opposite on standard LE to at least try to aim at LE PCOS version. You don't need to do it perfectly but I would def. aim at making PCO-type changes. The differences and some other info you might find handy is in this thread. http://genderdreaming.com/forum/gend...rt-3-pcos.html

3)I"m not sure you SHOULD be fully veg, though. One of the fairly important parts of the PCO-type diet is slightly fewer carbs and vegetarian diets can be quite carby so I would have a look at the diet and see what you think of it and if it's doable for you even in some form. the types of carbs in the PCOS diets are also better carbs (whole grains and fruit and veg) so do be sure you aren't doing the "teenage girl" vegetarian diet in which you're eating Cheetos and carrots and gummy worms as that will not only mess up your sway but will tank your egg quality as well.

[atomic sagebrush]

So I'm on day 2 of my lifestyle change but think I will be a skeleton if I do it for too long.
I ate 1325 cals today (that was 44g protein and 37g fat) Did 64 minutes on stationary bike travelling around 28.5KM. According to MFP I will lose over 10lbs in 5 weeks if I keep that up. I ate 3 meals, no snacks, 3 coffees, glass of wine. Feel full to be honest. Should I fast for less time (15 ish hours today between tea last night and breakfast today) or add I'm a 4th small meal to keep up cals til closer to ttc?

Sorry for all the questions. Swore I wouldn't do this but would like to get it straight in my head before ttc xxx

ETA I'm 128lbs and 5'5 presently. Was at 121 when I conceived DS3. I checked MFP and it's telling me I actually got down to 118lbs about 5 weeks before we got our BFP so I was wrong before when I said 121 was my lowest adult weight!

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Yep that's not gonna work. You MUST eat more. I do not want anyone but maybe 3-5% of all swayers on that few calories and I'd very much prefer you start off even as high as 1800-2000 range and see what happens.

On PCOS-type diet you will up that protein and fat to 50-60 g apiece. This in efffect cuts your % of carb intake and additionally you'll eat better carbs (not Cheetos and gummy worms!)

You should do whichever option works best for you - my inclination is a shorter fast and 3 bigger meals but some have gone to 4 meals, still better than the all-day munching that most of us boy moms tend to do.

[Debahlgrim]

Please go and reread the answer I gave in this thread, pg. 2 about what NOT to do.

The people who go over and over everything with a fine tooth comb and post or send me a message every day about something either that they have read and now need to know how to incorporate it or why not to and/or about things that happened in 2007 that they can't stop thinking about because surely it means their sway will fail and/or who have sequestered themselves in a dark room (because, Vit. D, ya know) and do nothing and go nowhere because they may have to eat a forbidden food and/or who make up these big complex schedules where every hour of every month for 3 months straight is planned down to the minute (and they actually FOLLOW it!) and/or who test everything possible to test like their temperature and pH and blood and urine and sweat and tears and fly into a panic when it varies even only slightly and/or who go on for 9 months refusing to drop even the most reasonable of things and then all of a sudden have convinced themselves they are dying of low B12 and have completely ruined their fertility and now have to suddenly do everything to end up swaying blue, etc, etc, etc. Those are the things not to do. I can almost, but not quite (because if I could tell this, I'd warn people) pick out the people who are in danger of failed sways because of this stuff.

But DO NOT take this to mean that you have to freak out and panic if you do feel a little uptight about swaying because all that is, is replacing stressing over swaying with stressing over stressing. It's the same darn thing. So you have to say, of course I will feel nervous about this. It's important to me. But people get girls every day of the year not doing any of this deliberate stuff I'm doing and at the end of it all I'm going to turn this over to a higher power or to the universe because I know I've done the doable and trying to do any more than that, will only turn me into a control freak and mess with my sway anyway. And then get out of your house, off the computer, see a movie and go out to dinner and have a cheat.

2) Clomid. No, not everyone is on Clomid. Not even close. I didn't use Clomid when I got my girl. But it is fine to take even if you don't strictly need it. Interestingly it's actually more likely to overstimulate the gals who really DO need it to conceive - those with moderate to severe PCO - than the rest of us. You need to get it from a doctor and they typically won't prescribe it unless a person has need for it, meaning they are not ovulating regularly or have a short LP or just aren't geting pregnant after several months or years of trying.

Hahaha!! Oh my goodness I was getting stressed just reading that. Last time I started swaying I was intense about it for a couple weeks and then settled in once I had a plan. I'm trying to get my plan set so I can relax and just pray for a girl and know I am doing what I can but I can't control everything. [emoji5]Doing WW helps because I am used to it and I just log in the food and stick within the points. I noticed I went over in protein yesterday so I'll adjust what I eat one day a little.

Thank you for thoroughly answering all my questions! Your answers always make me feel more at ease!


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