Part 3: Due January, February and March 2019

[Eighme]

TP, I am so sorry you are going through this. Have you considered marriage counseling, if that is an option, or something you're comfortable with.

I just hate that you are going through this all simultaneously and just words from a stranger on the internet is all I can give. You will be in my thoughts and prayers and I'm hoping you and your husband find a resolution that is healthy and good for everyone involved.



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[Throwaway_panther]

TP, I am so sorry you are going through this. Have you considered marriage counseling, if that is an option, or something you're comfortable with.

I just hate that you are going through this all simultaneously and just words from a stranger on the internet is all I can give. You will be in my thoughts and prayers and I'm hoping you and your husband find a resolution that is healthy and good for everyone involved.



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We've seen two different marriage counselors over the years, and he's seen two different individualized therapists as well. He always stops going once they say things he doesn't like. No red flags there!

And thank you for your words, because having you all here DOES help me. I luckily have very supportive understanding friends who have been very vocal about how surprised they are I AM still with DH after he treated me during all the losses (especially after we found out he lied about his own urology issue...). But the only place I can go to about my gender concerns is here :/

And yeah... all simultaneously is why I think I suddenly went from stable, peaceful, "At least DD will get a sibling no matter what" to "WHAT THE HELL AM I DOING? HAVING ANOTHER GIRL? WITH A MAN WHO TREATS ME LIKE SHIT?" And we don't even have a confirmation of gender! (Though I was already down the rabbit hole of depression even with DD's nub shot).

Maybe I just have antepartum depression every time :/ Yet another factor in, "Why am I making myself push through unwanted babies..." and yet another issue DH is incapable of supporting. Afterall, I was told to "fake smile" around him during all my losses because I was ~such a drag~

[Mommy2apples]

Tp my second boy hid his at 16 weeks and we had to go back at 17 weeks to confirm. He would not uncross his legs at all.


6/2003 [emoji1349]2/2009 [emoji1407] 12/2012 [emoji1349]4/2015 [emoji1406] 2015 [emoji1356] 2016 [emoji1413] The Lord Answered my [emoji1317] 2017🤰due June 2018, with a healthy [emoji1405][emoji166]to fit into our crazy bunch, and Complete our Family![emoji7][emoji8]

https://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/50268a

[Mommy2apples]

Tp I’m so sorry he had the nerve to treat you like that. How cruel of him during your losses too. So many hugs to you. If he’s abusive then being with him isn’t healthy for you and certainly not for your two babies.


6/2003 [emoji1349]2/2009 [emoji1407] 12/2012 [emoji1349]4/2015 [emoji1406] 2015 [emoji1356] 2016 [emoji1413] The Lord Answered my [emoji1317] 2017🤰due June 2018, with a healthy [emoji1405][emoji166]to fit into our crazy bunch, and Complete our Family![emoji7][emoji8]

https://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/50268a

[Raining]

So I had my scan and now I’m kind of worried. The machine in office was kind of old so she could not get a very clear up close shot. Each time she measured it was 5 days behind what I should be. Should be 7w5d, measured 7. Heart rate looked good she said but didn’t give me a number. She didn’t seem all too concerned with the measurements but since I know the day we conceived, I am. It’s impossible I’m only 7 weeks. I also go an early BFP at 10dpo.. Plus the internet is filled with horror stories and bad outcomes involving measuring behind. So instead of happy I’m confused and worried. I’ll go back in 2 weeks for repeat scan.

[Pretty]

TP, MEEEEEEE! DS hid his goods for multiple scans! I had so much pink stuff to return it was horrible! Of course, after numerous shopping sprees it couldn’t have been more obvious when he did decide to show (which was well into the twenty-some-odd weeks). I’m so sorry for what you’re going through, having previously been in an extremely abusive relationship, I know how hard it can be.... to stay, leave, being scared, unhappy. The unknown is so scary, but so is the prospect of a lifetime of unhappiness. Life is so short, I hope you find happiness, wherever it may lie and however it may come about. Hugs!

[Pretty]

Raining, this one had a date that bounced around too (despite the fact I know the date as well). At that gestation, they are so small and doctors and techs measure so quickly it’s bound to be off. Just a few pixels on a screen can make a huge difference in measurements. A good heartbeat is great news!! FWIW, mine is a girl! Fx!!!!

[Pretty]

Funny thing is, my doctor knows my.... “personality” that he corrected the computers EDD and put in my own LOL he said he trusted my notes far more than the machine.

[gafan]

We've seen two different marriage counselors over the years, and he's seen two different individualized therapists as well. He always stops going once they say things he doesn't like. No red flags there!

And thank you for your words, because having you all here DOES help me. I luckily have very supportive understanding friends who have been very vocal about how surprised they are I AM still with DH after he treated me during all the losses (especially after we found out he lied about his own urology issue...). But the only place I can go to about my gender concerns is here :/

And yeah... all simultaneously is why I think I suddenly went from stable, peaceful, "At least DD will get a sibling no matter what" to "WHAT THE HELL AM I DOING? HAVING ANOTHER GIRL? WITH A MAN WHO TREATS ME LIKE SHIT?" And we don't even have a confirmation of gender! (Though I was already down the rabbit hole of depression even with DD's nub shot).

Maybe I just have antepartum depression every time :/ Yet another factor in, "Why am I making myself push through unwanted babies..." and yet another issue DH is incapable of supporting. Afterall, I was told to "fake smile" around him during all my losses because I was ~such a drag~

TP, I'm sorry to hear you are going through all this. it is too early to know for sure that this isnt a boy, but I know GD can be intense and it is hard to hope ssometimes. Are you getting support for possible antepartum depression? Sounds like your husband is incredibly difficult to deal with and you deserve as much support as possible.

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[Kelbear]

I really don't things will get better with him. This is all such longstanding issues, and I was just so focused on getting my son -- now I have no means to go it alone after blowing all my savings on IVF, and don't feel it's even worth staying with him at times, especially when it's looking like he is the biggest obstacle towards me getting my son.

I did a TON of Googling and saw most people who couldn't tell gender at anatomy scan ended up having girls In our case, it's not the cord was blocking, it's that baby was literally crouched with feet up and in a position where tech couldn't even get shot of base of spine or cord, let alone anywhere near genitals... but still, I am feeling so hopeless between DH's continued assholery and now this. All of this just to get another girl. There have been so many moments where I've thought I should have just found out sex with NIPT and terminated if girl like I always planned. But no, I was "doing this for DD" and "DH would never forgive me if I terminated."

Now I'm here contemplating being alone, truly, and wondering how I'll weather an unwanted pregnancy and labor and then 2 kids by myself, with my dream of a boy being dashed even further by being single.

I just thought life was finally getting easier. Now I'm feeling like a fool.

I was also so relieved and felt so much better that the baby wouldn't show gender even to the techs! I kept thinking, "THANK YOU!" Now I'm realizing this probably pretty much confirmed it's a girl

TP it is just horrible that you are going through all this. Pregnancy and being a parent is hard enough when you have a supportive partner let alone feeling like you are doing it all by yourself. I just hope things can improve for you even if they don't get better with your DH. I will keep hoping you get your DS as this sounds like the one thing that might help give you the strength and desire to keep going.
I understand the feeling of being alone and how scary the prospect of being a single parent is as DH and I are in a similar place right now. DH still doesn't want this baby and has refused to go to any of my scans and still refers to this as my baby or 'you have a baby on the way' not our baby at all. He is emotionally abusive or distant (both seem as bad sometimes). He refuses to go to counselling and I don't know how we will make it through this as a couple. I am terrified at the prospect of being a single parent of 3 under 4 once Bub is born. I know if this baby is another boy he won't cope (not that he is already but if it's a girl he might come around eventually). I am so scared to find out the sex of this baby but know it is probably better to find out now and make some hard decisions rather than face him leaving as soon as the baby is born. I have barely slept in 4 days as I am so anxious about my anatomy scan which is in 5 hours now. I just know it will be another boy and I really don't know how I am going to cope with hearing that.

Surrounded I hope you are doing ok, I know you were hoping to hear pink. Your announcement is just so cute. I hope you can find joy in your new little man and in your eldest son's excitement towards this baby.

I hope everyone else is doing ok and good luck to those with upcoming scans or blood results.