Due in December 2014 - Jan/Feb 2015

[daisymoo]

And so sorry to hear about your mom Futureminime That must be so tough I bet she's watching you from heaven and is so proud of you x


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[SamS_TTCPink]

I am so sorry you're going through this Bunny, and to be left in such a limbo!!?! 😞 Hopefully they can give you another scan and you have more answers sooner than in another month.

Thinking of you xx

[Marika]

So sorry about your scan result Bunny, I hope everything will be ok and that you will get a healthy little boy!

[FutureMiniMe]

Thanks Hotdog, Rosie, and Daisy! It pales in comparison to what poor Bunny must be feeling. In general I am doing really well with it except in special circumstances like birthdays, holidays, and now. Also when the kids are going through something special because she loved them as much as I did!


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[FutureMiniMe]

Bunny, I second what everyone said much better than I could. It must be really hard to be in this waiting stage to figure everything out.


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[Sunflower3]

Future sorry I didn't comment earlier. I'm sorry about your loss. I lost my dad years ago and I still get emotional during holidays birthdays etc. because I know he would love to be around the kids and special days. It's hard too when they ask about him too. It's never the same without them. Hugs. Xxxx


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[crazycatcouple]

Bunny, as the rest have said, I hope you can get some answers to those scary questions soon!

As for having a boy for your fourth... That's exactly how my family is - 2 boys, me, and then another boy. My mom has told me she had hoped my little brother would have been a girl. To be honest though, he was my little sidekick! Yes, my older brothers tended to pick on me while growing up, but my little brother and I always stuck together against them :-). We were a team and the closest because of it. Now as adults, we're all extremely close, but I still have a special bond with my little brother that I wouldn't give up for the world! My girlfriends and I used to dress him up in our dance consumes and he loved it and always went along :-). Such fun memories, lol. But honestly, there were two things I took away from being the only girl with 3 brothers... 1, I only want one daughter. This may sound selfish, but my mom and I are so close, and I think a lot of that is because us two girls had to sick together :-). If I had a sister, I'm not sure I would have been quite as close to my mom. That's what I want with my daughter, so for selfish reasons, is prefer just one :-). Of course recently after being on this forum, I'm starting to try and see the positives of having a second more, simply because I may have to deal with that reality, but yeah. And 2 is that it was so important for me to marry a guy who would embrace his daughter to the nth degree and truly believe she can do and be anything a boy can. My dad was not a huge part of our lives, but he's a bit of a sexist male-shovanistic pig, lol. He was always telling me to be more girly, wear more dresses, and grow my hair out. He had 3 more boys with my step-mom, so I was his only girl out of 7 and always wished I had been a daddy's girl. Needless to say, he's a jerk and is no longer in my life. But my point is that I made sure to marry a man who would embrace being the father of girls. We tried for a boy this time, as that's what we would both prefer, but at least I know he could handle 2 girls, and only 2 girls, if that's what it comes down to (we're pretty certain we're stopping at 2 no matter what). Okay, so sorry for getting off on a tangent! My main point is that having just one girl could be such a blessing too :-). I loved it and would love to recreate that for my daughter, but with a better daddy.

As for telling people, I've told practically everyone I know, except we won't announce on FB or anything until after 13 weeks. I'm a talker by nature and can't keep the secret. Really hoping it doesn't come back to bite me in the butt, but at the same time, most people in my life that I've told would also end up hearing about a loss if that happened, as I'd likely need to talk about that too... It's just my nature. I still can't wait to share it truly publicly though!!

[crazycatcouple]

Future, I am so sorry for your loss! I can't even imagine how hard that must have been for you and then yes, I'm sure motherhood in general brings it back :-( I'm sure she's so proud of you though!!

[odd]

Future..I am so sorry to hear that

At the same time , so jealous of all of yours close knit families. I have an older sister and a younger brother but we r hardly close..even with our parents. Our parents screwed us up big time and as a result, none of us talk much to each other and thst was pretty evident growing up.

We still talk but hardly ever and that's because we have to.

I do believe its not the gender of the baby that decides closeness of the family, its how we are raised and the values we r taught. All kids fight when young, but it's when we grow up, those values play an important role.

[FutureMiniMe]

Thanks Sunflower, Crazycat, and Odd!

It is really great to hear perspectives on different sized families and whether you all are close to your siblings and what makes a difference in that! I have three half brothers who were much older than me and we are not close at all, so I was raised as an only child. I have always been conflicted when adding to the family because I get nervous about if I'm doing what's right for my kids. When we told people about number three someone said that we need to have kids in pairs. I also heard that if number 3 is a girl she might get bullied so I worried about that.
I would love a close relationship with a daughter (without disrupting the close amazing relationships I have so far with my little guys). And it is really nice to hear that all three of them can have a loving relationship with each other too. Our boys already love each other so much.


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