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  1. #161
    Kelissi- hang in there sweetie. Things will get better. We have to have the low points to be able to really enjoy the highs. Hugs

    sent using tapatalk
    Enjoying life with my crazy little DS1 2010: and DS2 2012:
    Jan 15- Loss sway baby 12 wks
    It's a boy!
    My Chart

  2. #162
    Hi missxo143! Welcome to the group .

    sent using tapatalk
    Enjoying life with my crazy little DS1 2010: and DS2 2012:
    Jan 15- Loss sway baby 12 wks
    It's a boy!
    My Chart

  3. #163
    Dream Vet
    missxo143's Avatar
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    May 2014
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    NY, USA
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    Hi Junie,

    Thanks for the welcome: )

  4. #164
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    Kelissi's Avatar
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    Mar 2013
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    Wilds of Pennsylvania
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    Thanks Junie. I'm just feeling low and hopeless and exhausted and that doesn't exactly make me want to jump up and go for a run. Siiiiiiiiiigh. I hope hope hope hope that this will get worked out - thanks so much for putting up with my crazy ramblings!
    Momma of two outstanding boys, actress, doula, activist, chaser of chickens, lover of all things glittery, capable of being lost anywhere but especially in a book.
    Loving mothering my littles :
    Our Prince of Don (9/08) and Rider of Rohan (2/11)
    Hoping for a new little love to complete our family in spring/summer 2015.
    Starting TTC in October 2014. Pleeeeeease, !
    Gentle birth does not have to mean natural birth. Ask me about family centered cesarean!

  5. #165
    Dream Newbie

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    May 2014
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    BC, Canada
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    Ah, men! Haha
    My husband is so noncommittal about having a child of our own. He loves our foster son so much he says that life is perfect the way he is and he wouldn't want to risk messing it up! Kind of cute really that he loves Kaden so much he doesn't think he could share his time, especially since he is isn't biologically his kid!
    He's agreed to have a baby because of how upset I was when miscarried our oops pregnancy this year, and I absolutely know he'll be just as devoted of a Dad when a baby arrives, but it's slightly annoying being the only one actively wanting and preparing for conceiving another child. I think he's still adjusting to the role of being a father, when we met I told him I never wanted kids and he was fine with that, then hormones kicked in! Haha!
    Married Oct 2013
    Foster Mom to Kaden James 2012, with us since 7 months
    Miscarriage 02/14 at 5.5 weeks
    Miscarriage 05/14 at 10.5 weeks
    Detoxing over summer 2014 then TTC again in the fall
    Bodhi Dylan was born June 2015!
    Hubby says we're done with two kids but I keep dreaming about a daughter...

  6. #166
    Dream Vet
    hotdogz&boyz's Avatar
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    Aug 2012
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kelissi View Post
    On being tired and going it alone:

    My husband is still not on board and I'm supposed to start my LE diet tomorrow. I've been running every other day and getting ready, but if I say the word "pregnant," he still rolls his eyes and leaves the room. Today we were supposed to be going to a nearby city with the boys to go to an art museum, have some yummy lunch at a cafe, and just a nice day. I'm exhausted from dealing with this stupid stress and this stupid marriage and having married such the wrong person. I don't want to go and pretend to be okay for him. I'm tired of pretending to be okay for him.

    I want to be excited about getting ready to TTC. I want to be excited about potentially having a daughter. Instead I'm dealing with stress - not only something that he's uninterested in, but something that I actively do not want to bring up to him because I'm tired of his unpleasantness.

    He's acknowledged that we'll either be having another child or getting divorced. He's right. If I'm going to be having a dramatically different life than I had hoped, I'm sure as hell not spending it with the person who decided that he was and always will be more important in this relationship than I am. I'd rather be a single mom and have the opportunity for love and respect in a future partnership, as well as all the different opportunities for education and employment that being out of this marriage would bring.

    I've spent some time reconnecting with a past romantic flame (just talking, obviously, nothing unethical). It feels good. It reminds me that there is a life outside of this relationship. I'm starting to lean towards never having a daughter and being out of this relationship being a way better option than continuing to try to have my husband see my side and spending my life with someone who is so utterly, completely selfish.

    I've gotten so used to seeing my hand without wedding rings on. It feels good, too.

    He has no idea why any of this would be a big deal - why it would be a big deal that I never had a daughter, why it would be a big deal that I desperately want a third child. He thinks I should just let go of it, because it doesn't matter to him, and so why would it matter to me?

    I feel so worn down and exhausted and just. Tired. And I'm supposed to go shopping for my LE stuff today. And all I want to do is cry. How could I have married someone like this?
    Please forgive me for being so blunt (it's kind of a personality trait of mine). But why would you WANT to have another child with such an individual? I know I don't know the backstory and maybe there is a big aspect I am missing or not seeing. But given your description of him above, I can't see why you would want to stick around. I'm not a huge advocate for divorce, not without counseling and attempts at rectifying what might be changed. But if he is a selfish, unpleasant person to be around and be married to, I certainly wouldn't be settling into a life of that for myself and my children. I don't really think its fair to bring another child into an unstable union. Not fair for anyone involved, but the kids will be the ones to ultimately suffer, since kids are much more intuative than we tend to give them credit for (and know that something is not kosher with Mom and Dad). I'm not saying its not something you might be able to work through. However, now does not seem like the time to make purposeful attempts at another child, when he can't even discuss getting pregnant and makes you want to forgo fun activities to remove yourself from him. I don't mean any of that rude or snarky or anything, I have no judgements on you or your choices. I just know that generally speaking its not a good idea to rush into something like this on a rocky marriage. Babies, despite their wonderful charms, tend to make rocky marriages even rockier, despite many believing otherwise. I really am sorry you are dealing with this though. My very good friend is in a similar relationship and its so hard to see her suffer and not be able to make her happy. You deserve a lot better, this I know. No one should have to settle for someone who doesn't consider the feelings of others.
    A: "Owner" of the following brood:
    -Our biggest surprise dude (L: 2009)
    -Our rainbow little man (K: 2011)
    -Our sway and pray little diva (J: 2013)
    -Our lucky charm guy (S: 2015)
    We may be done, we may come back for one more sway. Time will tell. At the moment, we are very content with our family!

  7. #167
    Dream Vet
    hotdogz&boyz's Avatar
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    As for me: negative test today, but not really sure how many DPO I am. Best guess says its too early to test. I dunno what ill do if its negative. I have totally gone from eating somewhat LE and being more girly in lifestyle to being major HE for a week now. I dunno what my issue is! So if we do get a negative (no big deal, this was somewhat an oops), I might push off swaying another month into August to have more time on LE and take off more weight (I've gained a couple pounds...yikes!). So, not sure. I have no pregnancy symptoms. But I don't know if i will this early. I don't remember with my others when things started.
    A: "Owner" of the following brood:
    -Our biggest surprise dude (L: 2009)
    -Our rainbow little man (K: 2011)
    -Our sway and pray little diva (J: 2013)
    -Our lucky charm guy (S: 2015)
    We may be done, we may come back for one more sway. Time will tell. At the moment, we are very content with our family!

  8. #168
    I've never had a positive before 10 DPO, maybe it is still too early hotdogz...
    Enjoying life with my crazy little DS1 2010: and DS2 2012:
    Jan 15- Loss sway baby 12 wks
    It's a boy!
    My Chart

  9. #169
    Dream Vet
    missxo143's Avatar
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    May 2014
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    NY, USA
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    Have any of you had the Mirena IUD and if so how long did you have it and how long did it take yout body to adjust back to normal?

  10. #170
    Dream Vet
    MyByC's Avatar
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    heaven..
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    Hi girls. I'm planning my sway in August. As a matter of fact! I'm pretty lucky as if my calendar calculates correctly my lenght cycle I'll have first day in 19 July which makes my O day around 1-2 August and another 1st day on 15 July(around), which makes my possible O day on 29-30 August? These after calculating my last lenght cycles and O day...
    I'm waiting for my personalised plan so I can start whatever Atomic decides is best for me. I'll put all the effort and watch every detail with attention.
    Hope I can join due date clucb of a pink baby soon.
    Anybody is starting the plan next weeks?
    My family puzzle is complete now 💕
    Thank you Atomic! 😍

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