how do you feel about swaying

[begonia]

I agree with much of Tulle and Skrimpy's sentiments. I also think of it this way. I was actively trying NOT to get pg when we got pg with DD1. I was on BCP's and DH and I were just not ready at all. I felt no guilt about trying to influence when I had kids... and I imagine many of us on this board didn't think twice about trying to control that aspect of reproduction. So there I was trying to control God's plan through my own means, and you know what? He vetoed my decision, and in spite of the BCP's I found myself pregnant. And so that is how I think about swaying... it's like my BCP's in that I'm making my own little human effort to control my destiny, but I know (and am so thankful) that I don't have the ultimate control in the end.

So to answer the question, personally I feel 100% ok with swaying. My DH doesn't have a problem with it from a religious/ethical standpoint, he more or less just doesn't care if we have a 3rd girl so isn't bothered to sway. So I drink my ACV cocktails alone :-)

[Glittergirl]

Yes! I struggle with these feelings of guilt all the time. I sometimes feel like God will give me a girl with some sort of problems because of swaying. I have to remind myself God is not spiteful and really this is all in HIS hands anyway. But it is one of the reasons I am not going too crazy over the sway. I want to keep my body healthy for my future baby.

I think this is how I was thinking at first as I work with special needs kids and count my blessings everyday. I know the God I believe in would not "punish" me either. I haven't struggled with the guilty feeling lately. I pray everyday for a healthy happy baby and if it's meant to be, my sway will work and i'll have a girl. I also have changed my diet a bit so that I can stay healthy too. very important to be healthy!

[crystal-light]

Also, when I found out that this peanut is a girl, I turned to DH and said, "I guess God wants us to have more" because I know that had this one been a boy, I would have stopped at 3.

love this!

[purplepoet20]

If I get a child with special needs it will still be my baby. I am not the type to not love or care for a child. They can be taught to live with their problems. My neighbor has mild downs and he has 2 jobs, a car, house, and walks his 2 dogs every 4hrs... If we had a special needs child we would set up a trust to cover bills and such, and teach my other boys to look in on their sibling and make sure everything is good.

I feel a little guilty because I don't want my boys to think I don't love them. But I plan to be honest with them when they are older and can understand. I am trying to be careful because I am breastfeeding and I want a healthy baby. Some vitamins may be to nutri (A, E, B6) for the girl sway but if I get a healthy child then I will be happy. I feel in my heart that I am looking out for the health of myself, nursing son, and furture child... I want a girl but if I get a boy he will be loved.

I will never lie to my kids when they ask if I wanted a girl. I will never treat them poorly because they are boys. I will never allow anyone to make rude comments in front of them. I will love them forever... DS1 special book has a quote "I'll love you forever, I'll like you for always, As long as I'm living my baby you'll be" Best book ever for moms of boys. DS2's book is "You are my I Love You"... 100% about my little moose!!!

[JustKim]

So to answer the question, personally I feel 100% ok with swaying. My DH doesn't have a problem with it from a religious/ethical standpoint, he more or less just doesn't care if we have a 3rd girl so isn't bothered to sway. So I drink my ACV cocktails alone :-)

I couldn't agree with this more! I convinced my DH to take the pills and slightly alter his diet, but in the end, if His plan is to give me a 3rd daughter one day, I am perfectly fine with it. Do I want to have the privilege of raising both a girl(s) and a boy? Of course. But, in the end, is it more important for me to be blessed with raising another beautiful child? Absolutely.

[kaseybaby]

If I get a child with special needs it will still be my baby. I am not the type to not love or care for a child. They can be taught to live with their problems. My neighbor has mild downs and he has 2 jobs, a car, house, and walks his 2 dogs every 4hrs... If we had a special needs child we would set up a trust to cover bills and such, and teach my other boys to look in on their sibling and make sure everything is good.

I feel a little guilty because I don't want my boys to think I don't love them. But I plan to be honest with them when they are older and can understand. I am trying to be careful because I am breastfeeding and I want a healthy baby. Some vitamins may be to nutri (A, E, B6) for the girl sway but if I get a healthy child then I will be happy. I feel in my heart that I am looking out for the health of myself, nursing son, and furture child... I want a girl but if I get a boy he will be loved.

I will never lie to my kids when they ask if I wanted a girl. I will never treat them poorly because they are boys. I will never allow anyone to make rude comments in front of them. I will love them forever... DS1 special book has a quote "I'll love you forever, I'll like you for always, As long as I'm living my baby you'll be" Best book ever for moms of boys. DS2's book is "You are my I Love You"... 100% about my little moose!!!

Those are the two books I read the most to my DS!

[Glittergirl]

Love those books too! YES I'm feeling better about this whole sway thing cause I know it's not in my hands in the end. Some women do the best sway ever, sways that I could never do and they still get opposite...then you have those who do nothing and get DG. I just haven't told anyone about my swaying. Only Dh and one of my sisters knows. Even my sister doesn't know that i check pH ALL the time or anything about the ion stuff, she just knows that I'm watching salt etc. I kinda mentioned it to my mom and other sister but they really don't know the extent! My main thing is, I don't want to let anyone down and I don't want anyone to feel sorry for me. If I get another DS I want to celebrate him just as I did with my others and just as I would have it it was a girl. Every child deserves that. I know as a mom we LOVE all our children, but it kinda sucks when others aren't as happy for you...it's kinda like "Oh, another boy...congrats". I just hope my family will be just as excited!!! And YES special needs kids are so wonderful! I love working with them because my experience is they are usually very happy-go-lucky and just so positive and full of life. They tend to live in the moment! I learn from them everyday.

[purplepoet20]

Those are the two books I read the most to my DS!

We read so much but those are the favorites and I just hope they will not fall apart before they can be passed to grandkids. We also enjoy Dr Suess.

[CapricornAquarius]

Its funny because this question was asked on IG and I will answer the same answer I gave there. I truly believe God gives us tools with which we can make decisions. Nothing falls into our laps unless we work for it. If He didnt want us to access certain information or methods, they would not be on earth. If He created it, or created those who create it, it is here for our use. I feel no guilt for planning my sway. If it wont work, I know it is His plan and I feel at peace with that knowledge.

Also, when I found out that this peanut is a girl, I turned to DH and said, "I guess God wants us to have more" because I know that had this one been a boy, I would have stopped at 3.

I totally agree with your answer, only difference is I know I will stop at 3, even if I do end up with another girl.

[rainbowflower]

personally I don't feel there's any harm in trying to sway - if it's not meant to be it won't happen

we had a MMC with our first pregnancy, we found out at our dating scan after seeing our precious baby alive and well in a scan at 9 weeks (died at 11 weeks), and we were devastated! Second pregnancy I was full of fear the whole way through, and it took a very long time to start to enjoy it.

I know for certain that every scan I go to with my next pregnancy my first thought and fear will be that the baby has died or is poorly, gender will always come second to me. However, a healthy pink baby next time will be the icing on the cake!