TTC Girl - March 2012

[prayforprincess]

Now I am wearing a pad bleeding like a period -- still 3 days before my af is Due!
My temp is 98.6 this am -- wouldn't it have gone down if I was getting my af this morning.
I think something is wrong with me -- I just had a crying breakdown on the phone with my girlfriend.
I can't believe this -- I am just so tired. I have spent well over a year trying to get pg through ht and now swaying for this girl and there is one disappointment and obstacle after another. I am truly ready to give up. Just go on with my life and get pregnant whenever it happens. But then will I regret not trying -- ya, I know myself and I will.
Why is this happening to me? I am so tired of all of this being the front burner in my life -- I just need it to be over.

[HopeandDreamG]

Prayforprincess~ I know you will not give up from gettting to know you. I think you need to get that blood test today. Just put your mind at ease. Call doc and make sure it would show in a blood test now. There is no answer to "why me". We like to believe that good things happen to good people and bad things happend to bad people. The world is just not that way. There is no order to the world. Wish there was. If there was, I would never have conceived a baby girl with chromosome problems. My due date is past and I don't even have a BFP yet, cannot believe it. It Makes me mad to think about it, but I quess I can ask also why NOT me?? iykwim

[HopeandDreamG]

Oh, and your temp staying elevated is a great sign

[wilma_five]

@PFP maybe you have an early mc?
I hope everything turns out well!!! Praying for you!

[littlemissnaughty7]

PFP i dont know what to say hun, do you think this is your period ?

[Mochagirl]

PFP - I'm sorry for all this bleeding and I totally understand your feelings. I really hope you figure out what's going on soon.

Hope - hugs for everything you've gone through too. I just know you'll get that BFP really soon!

[prayforprincess]

Thanks girls! You are all so great.

So I talked with my doctor. It appears it might just be an "early miscarriage". It is apparent that the little brown spotting I had 1 weeks before my period was the beginning of implantation. But it seems the little bugger just could not get all the way in there. It was obviously trying...really hard since the spotting lasted a few days. But ultimately, it didn't make it and now my whole lining is shedding...i.e. my period is here. But my temp is still high so maybe it will got back down by tomorrow or the day after, once my body registers this is all over.
So that's it. It sounds right -- its the only thing that sounds right or makes any sense. She said a lot of people have had this, but many don't look into it and think its just spotting and then their af comes early. Since I am tracking, temping, ttc -- I knew exactly what it was; but with many it goes undiscovered. Totally natural and ok.
So...is this now cd1 for me?? I have no idea when I will o this month no due to this. Probably late I would imagine. But hey - don't they say that pregnancy after mc sways girls. Not that it was a real pregnancy yet or anything. Maybe it was a boy, and knew it couldn't survive the low glucose low calorie. Who know's. It just sucks I gotta go another month.
Kinda botched the diet a little. Have been staying low calorie/low fat for the most part, but did have some red meat that one night. Ooops! I will be ultra hard core on it now starting tomorrow. Guess I will really have to be monitoring my cm and taking opk's.
I think I might only do one attempt this month the night of or morning after my +opk. Just use application of rephresh every 3 days once af stops -- no touch ups before our attempt. I will have dh try to abstain from tomorrow night til our attempt. Take licorice root 2xday. Me just saw palmetto and folic acid.
What do you think?

[HopeandDreamG]

Prayforprincess~responded on the other thread..I am so sorry. Regarding your question though, I am not sure why you are changing your attempt plan. Maybe, you feel this was a boy? You are right, after m/c does sway girl. I think changing the plan could cause too much stress, also I don't want to see you not get preggo with a one time attempt. I know how much you went over that aspect with Atomic. It took some getting my brain around the mutiple attempt issue as well. Don't worry about the one cheat of red meat, and the other small cheats. It will keep you going for March. I'm bummed about this

[girlmom]

im so sorry prp, i was really rooting for you over here. hopefully next month it will be your turn. it probably was a boy, i know it doesn't make the hurt any less but i read somewhere we have a 52% chance of having a boy every month but boy embryos are small and less hardy then the females, so usually when we miscarry we lose boys, its natures way of making a more even male to female ratio. not sure how true it is but it made sense to me. again im sorry and hopefully you will get a bfp soon.

[Mochagirl]

I'm sorry, PFP, but I'm happy that at least you have some answers now.

I have to agree with Hope that I wouldn't want to only have one attempt, but then again I'm 37 and you're probably a lot younger (which I assume since you're going to have dh abstain), so your situation may be different. Do whatever will make you feel best about your sway.