Extended BF'ing mamas - how did it affect your fertility?

[LacePrincess]

I would like to know how other extended bf'ing moms have found the breastfeeding affecting their fertility. I've read a bunch of Kellymom articles and other stuff, but the range of returning fertility is really broad! And as usual it depends on the individual.

I am currently (still!!!!) nursing DS3, who's 2 years 9.5 months or so. He's on the boob more often than I think is usual for his age. We're going with the child-led weaning thing, and he's still cosleeping. He nurses probably 4-6 times during waking hours, and sleep nurses at night. The night sessions are probably more nutritive I think (as in, he's taking in more milk). The day thing is more of a human-pacifier thing, lol. During the day it's usually just a nibble off and on, comfort of the boob while watching tv sorta thing. Like, the baby version of the beer hat!.

Anyways, just wanted to hear how other extended bf'ing moms knew that their fertility was back? I read on Kellymom that returning AF doesn't always mean ovulation. I've had my periods back since DS3 was around 9 months old, but they have been shorter and lighter than they were before. So I dunno what to make of that, hopefully I AM ovulating, but I'm concerned this might mean insufficient uterine lining for implantation.

I haven't tracked my cycles till this month, so I'm not sure what was going on with my cervix, CM, etc in the past little while. My cervix has been opening up/softening, and I do have fertile CM (not a lot because of the LE diet), so is this a good sign that I *am* ovulating?

Just wanted to hear everyone's experiences - what fertility signs you got while still nursing that meant you knew you were fertile again, how long it took to get pregnant (and do you feel BF'ing made it harder?), and did you have any luteal phase deficiencies (as bf'ing can increase prolactin which can cause LPD?)?

I do wonder if I'm nursing a lot more than the usual for DS3's age, that'll really sway pink for me anyways, and if I should not sway so hard in other ways so I don't make it impossible to get preggo at all.

Would love some feedback! Thanks, ladies!

[LacePrincess]

Wanted to add a few charts. The first is the current month, the second from three years ago when we conceived DS3 (not nursing at the time).

[jennaesue]

Well, I mentioned to you before that I bfed ds2 until he was 3. But he was nursing much less often than your ds. I started ovulating when he was around 18 months, and I just happened to take on opk one day and it was blaringly positive! I started periods 2 weeks after that. We did try to get pregnant then, but it just wasn't happening. We decided to put it off, and I went back on the pill. Then right after he turned three (and also stopped nursing) I accidentally missed a week of bcp (due to me putting off picking it up and then a mix up at the pharmacy) and lo and behold, I was pregnant with ds3. So after finishing nursing I got pregnant, like, right away. This time, ds3 was weaned when he was 21 months, and things seem to be moving a lot slower. Ugh. I stopped the bcp almost 2 weeks ago and I am hoping and praying I get a period soon. I think I *may* have ovulated the day before I stopped the pill, but I am not 100%.

I think your temp increase indicates that you did ovulate. I want to start temping next cycle.

[LacePrincess]

Thanks for sharing, Jenna! I would think it likely, though, if the bcp's also play a part in delaying your return to fertility?

I see differences between you and me, since AF returned for me before DS3 was a year old, and have been fairly regular (if not as heavy) ever since. I'm tending to think that means I am ovulating but that perhaps the prolactin is suppressing estrogen, hence low sex drive (ok, NO sex drive), drier CM, and thinner uterine lining. Also would explain the loooooooooong buildup to actually ovulate. I do worry this means my lining isn't thick enough to successfully implant though, but I'm trying not to worry about problems that don't exist yet, LOL.

I do think this would probably mean I should not sway as hard since the whole point of the LE diet is to suppress estrogen. But if mine is pretty darned suppressed already I don't want to take it too far or I'll just be infertile! Maybe just work on staying noncompetitive and keeping my stress down to minimize testosterone. Hmm.

[LacePrincess]

bump....any more bf'ing mommas want to share?

[atomic sagebrush]

If you're BF an almost 3 year old and getting AF, the odds are extremely high you're ovulating.

I have had super fake O's when breastfeeding, so I had EWCM and soft cervix and O pains and everything and then never gotten AF. Your body kind of goes thru the motions for a bit before it really kicks it into high gear.

With DS 4, we started TTC when DS 3 was 7 months. I had one AF that month and then nothing afterwards for several months (I think DS 3 was 11 months when I conceived DS 4). I took vitex 2 w on, 2 w off in the same pattern as when I had the one AF and caught the first egg before I even had another AF.

With DD, we started TTC when DS 4 was about 1 1/2 (caught the first egg again but it was chemical) and it took 6 months (plus 6 months of vitex) before we caught the good egg. But I was also 41, so I think that had more to do with it than me breastfeeding.

FWIW I nurse my older kids tons too. Your body knows that your LO is older, even tho he's still nursing a lot.

[atomic sagebrush]

Your charts look fertile to me. Those are ovulatory charts

[atomic sagebrush]

Thanks for sharing, Jenna! I would think it likely, though, if the bcp's also play a part in delaying your return to fertility?

I see differences between you and me, since AF returned for me before DS3 was a year old, and have been fairly regular (if not as heavy) ever since. I'm tending to think that means I am ovulating but that perhaps the prolactin is suppressing estrogen, hence low sex drive (ok, NO sex drive), drier CM, and thinner uterine lining. Also would explain the loooooooooong buildup to actually ovulate. I do worry this means my lining isn't thick enough to successfully implant though, but I'm trying not to worry about problems that don't exist yet, LOL.

I do think this would probably mean I should not sway as hard since the whole point of the LE diet is to suppress estrogen. But if mine is pretty darned suppressed already I don't want to take it too far or I'll just be infertile! Maybe just work on staying noncompetitive and keeping my stress down to minimize testosterone. Hmm.

But you don't ~know~ that's the case. I think the LE Diet sways for reasons we don't yet know, and we don't even know whether estrogen levels even really sway. So I'd hate to see you not do diet on the assumption your estrogen levels are low, when they may be perfectly fine and they may not even sway to begin with.

[LacePrincess]

But you don't ~know~ that's the case. I think the LE Diet sways for reasons we don't yet know, and we don't even know whether estrogen levels even really sway. So I'd hate to see you not do diet on the assumption your estrogen levels are low, when they may be perfectly fine and they may not even sway to begin with.

Oh no worries, I'm sticking to the diet. Blame my OCD obsessive self, when I make a commitment I stick to it, come hell or high water, LMAO!! I'm stubborn as a mule too, don't know when to quit even when I *should*. Hence, my stress fracture when I was running last year!

Though I do wish the cravings would back off and I REALLY wish I didn't dream about food. Sigh.

Regarding AF, thanks so much for the reassurance. It's backwards to me to think that hello, you don't GET AF till *after* an egg drops, not before, duh.....bit of a chicken-and-egg thing, but it makes total sense. What I need to stop is catastrophizing, which is what I do ALL the time. Shocker, that, right? LOL!!!

You're right about the body knowing the kid is older though. I don't think I'm actually producing that much milk, most of Alex's nursing is for comfort (yay human pacifier). I went on a spa retreat for 3 days and brought my pump, and could barely pump that much even after the second night, so yeah, I'm not producing a LOT. It just feels like he's always attached to me! Which I love when I'm in a cuddly mood, but good grief sometimes I feel SO touched out.

[XXdreaming]

I wasnt ttcing at all and ds4 was an oops but I got pregnant with ds4 when ds3 was 16mos old and nursing frequently(got pregnant when ds3 was a 1yr old another oops but ended at 7 wks) my cycles were way off I noticed when he nursed more the longer my cycles were so I know that sometimes he did delay ovulation causing my cycles to be longer, my cycles returned when he was 8mos old, probably doesn't help any but thought I would share