Trying to find my life path... any advice appreciated 😊

[kittendreams]

Gah!!! Just realised you said team green! How awesome if we were pregnant together and could help each other stay team green?

[Pbn3]

Yes yes yes LMSM and Kittendreams!!! I can say 100% that team green rocks

After the 12w scan (which I totally recommend not looking at any time other than face shots , it becomes quite a 'comfort' not knowing if it's pink or blue cooking..


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[LMSM]

I’m really hoping I can stick to it..hubs wouldn’t mind so it’ll be le battling my own anxieties haha
First, I need to’ know whether I can take the plunge...and that, is still my biggest issue.
So hope that if I can decide, and go ahead - we can stay strong together haha

[Dreamlovehope]

Hi Kitten,

I read your post and thought, you sound just like I did after I had DS3. I was 39 too and we only wanted 3. I just assumed at least one of them would be a girl, but when that didn't work out I was so upset. I had GD bad, and then I started to think about maybe a 4th. DH was not keen on the idea. I had never swayed, I only found this website just before I had DS3, but everything I read on here told me I was blue friendly.

I had the same thoughts as you, could I handle 4 children, would we have the time and money to give them what they needed. For me I felt like I needed one more try at having a DD, and I didn't want to look back and regret not having tried. If it didn't work out, then it really wasn't meant for me and maybe I could be at peace with that.

DH finally agreed, he wasn't convinced about swaying, but I thought it was worth trying something different since we had done the same things 3 times and had all boys. I did change my diet to be pink friendly, but didn't calorie count, exercise, or take any medications/supplements. We changed our bd pattern to one attempt then e4d. TBH I was quite negative during the 3 months we swayed, I thought there was no way this was going to work and that I would be perfectly happy with 4 boys, why would I be the one to have a girl after 3 boys, when so many people IRL have 4 boys. When i got my bfp, I was relieved, it was over, whatever was meant to happen will be, and I can move forward with my life. I felt like I was mentally exhausted thinking about this 'having a DD' thing so much and just wanted to move on. I was surprised when I found out it was a girl! Ironically when I was pregnant with all 3 boys I was excited and positive it was going to be a girl, so there may be something in that (as nearlyalegume said too).

I'm excited I get this chance to have a DD, although I don't think I will fully relax until she's born and safely in my arms. I know its going to be hard work with 4 young children (my eldest is 6) and there will be good and bad days as ABC has said, but that's just how it is, and I'll have to do it. Time was not on my side to have a bigger age gap. What keeps me going is that they will grow up and it will get easier (at least the physical side of it anyway).

So enjoy your precious little boy and good luck with your decision. I'm not sure I have any better advice to give you, that others haven't already posted. But my heart when out to you when I read your post and thought I would share my story. I wish you all the very best for pink if you do go ahead for a 4th and hope you find peace with whatever you decide to do.

[kittendreams]

Hi Kitten,

I read your post and thought, you sound just like I did after I had DS3. I was 39 too and we only wanted 3. I just assumed at least one of them would be a girl, but when that didn't work out I was so upset. I had GD bad, and then I started to think about maybe a 4th. DH was not keen on the idea. I had never swayed, I only found this website just before I had DS3, but everything I read on here told me I was blue friendly.

I had the same thoughts as you, could I handle 4 children, would we have the time and money to give them what they needed. For me I felt like I needed one more try at having a DD, and I didn't want to look back and regret not having tried. If it didn't work out, then it really wasn't meant for me and maybe I could be at peace with that.

DH finally agreed, he wasn't convinced about swaying, but I thought it was worth trying something different since we had done the same things 3 times and had all boys. I did change my diet to be pink friendly, but didn't calorie count, exercise, or take any medications/supplements. We changed our bd pattern to one attempt then e4d. TBH I was quite negative during the 3 months we swayed, I thought there was no way this was going to work and that I would be perfectly happy with 4 boys, why would I be the one to have a girl after 3 boys, when so many people IRL have 4 boys. When i got my bfp, I was relieved, it was over, whatever was meant to happen will be, and I can move forward with my life. I felt like I was mentally exhausted thinking about this 'having a DD' thing so much and just wanted to move on. I was surprised when I found out it was a girl! Ironically when I was pregnant with all 3 boys I was excited and positive it was going to be a girl, so there may be something in that (as nearlyalegume said too).

I'm excited I get this chance to have a DD, although I don't think I will fully relax until she's born and safely in my arms. I know its going to be hard work with 4 young children (my eldest is 6) and there will be good and bad days as ABC has said, but that's just how it is, and I'll have to do it. Time was not on my side to have a bigger age gap. What keeps me going is that they will grow up and it will get easier (at least the physical side of it anyway).

So enjoy your precious little boy and good luck with your decision. I'm not sure I have any better advice to give you, that others haven't already posted. But my heart when out to you when I read your post and thought I would share my story. I wish you all the very best for pink if you do go ahead for a 4th and hope you find peace with whatever you decide to do.

First of all CONGATULATIONS!!! I am so thrilled you are getting your girl what a beautiful family you have!

Secondly, thank you so much for taking the time to respond to me I'm so grateful.
Your story gives me hope and courage to try again so I'm so glad you shared your story on here.
Do you mind sharing the changes you made to sway pink?
Also, how old is your youngest?

I hope pregnancy is treating you well and I can't wait to hear of the arrival of your pink bundle xx

[Dreamlovehope]

Thanks Kitten!

My youngest will be 2.5 yrs when DD arrives. I kept to 3 meals a day, because I was always a big snacker when I conceived my boys. I did skip breakfast at first but then found it harder to eat later in the morning so had breakfast after a 12hr fast overnight. I had toast and jam at breakfast with a coffee, a cheese sandwich at lunch, with fruit, a coffee and something sweet like biscuits or cake and at dinner I ate chicken, fish or eggs, with vegetables or salad and potato or rice, a glass (or 2) of wine and a little something sweet again. If I made pasta, I just had it with sauce and cheese, no meat. When the boys were in bed I had a peppermint tea. I did lose weight but not sure how much.

The other big change for me was our bd pattern, when we conceived the boys we bd more than once in the fertile window. So we tried one attempt for a couple of months but kept missing O. Then did e4d, the first 2 times were 96hrs apart and then the 2nd and 3rd times were about 80 hrs apart, but i think i may have o'd before then. I think that made a difference for me anyway, I know this may not have worked for others.

Good luck