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  1. #21
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    Ok I posted that diet/exercise part above, re the irregular cycle -

    Yes that was def. a couple oddball cycles there in Oct and Nov. Given that I'd probably consider having you do e4d instead (just have unprotected sex every 4 days, starting after your period ends and going on till you're sure you've ovulated, even if that means going all the way till your next period starts) in the 72 hour pattern for best chance of conception, every 96 hours for best chance of pink but lower chance of conception.)

    What you're describing dos NOT mean you are ovulating for a long time (that's not really a thing). What you describe is actually entirely normal. Many of us myself included have a solid week of EWCM and O pains if not even longer some months. I've had EWCM and O pains starting CD 3 for CD 14 ovulation on several occasions! It's actually far, far more common to have that pattern than to have one day of symptoms and then O the next day.

    Are you getting many days of positive OPK though?? Sorry that wasn't quite clear to me.

    Is the needing to have just one shot solely because of the months thing?? I truly think you may want to try to set that aside as it's going to be another source of that control freakish pressure that does not help a pink sway in any way
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  2. #22
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    Thank you for all the help!!

    SO—as far as the every 4 day thing goes—can you explain to me one more time why that sways girl? Makes me just a little nervous. I did some more digging around online last night and found that most people say to do it as far before ovulation as possible, and to only do it once. I did find a few more people saying more frequent dtd.

    My freakish controlling thing is about the month, partially—really want a November baby!!—but moreso it’s about feeling like once I’m pregnant, it’s over and I don’t have another chance to try something different or sway a different way or WHATEVER it is—it’s just my last pregnancy and last baby, and I really feel like I’m almost sabotaging my “diet” because I’m so nervous about getting pregnant that i’m giving myself an excuse. (“Oh, I need to follow the diet longer, oh I haven’t been dieting or exercising, better not try yet after all.”) Because—this is IT!

    As far as the diet goes, I do follow a vegetarian diet like 80% of the time, at least. I eat very little meat. I eat a lot of sweets. Some dairy. A lot of carbs. A decent amount of fruits and veggies. I’ve been skipping breakfast most days. I haven’t been taking a multivitamin. (Considering calcium and magnesium, though...)

    I do need to exercise. Is just walking okay? Like if I try to do longer/more frequent walks? That’s just the easiest thing for me to do.

    Thanks again!!

  3. #23
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    Because it's always one attempt. E4d attempts are far enough apart to only BE one attempt (especially if you stretch it to every 96 hours). So I am not telling you to have more than one attempt, I'm simply telling you that if you have sex every 4 days, that's an easy wa to do one attempt without being sure about when you'll ovulate (since with an irregular cycle you're not going to be able to predict that.)

    DO NOT do more frequent DTD at least to start off with. One attempt is good! It's jsut that e4d is an easy way to do one attempt for those who can't manage to do one attempt due to irregular cycles and/or not wanting to use OPK.

    The people who tell you to DTD as far before O as possible are basing that on a 50 year old theory that has been completely debunked by modern science. We know exactly the mistake the researcher made, we know his idea was wrong, everything about it has been debunked, but it just keeps hanging on. I have the full case against timing here: https://www.genderdreaming.com/forum...le-timing.html

    I hear what you're saying about wanting to have reasons to not try, but the catch is that a lot of people do that and end up doing it righ into trying without doing diet or exercise!! So they basically create what they fear, we boy moms are often all or nothing type thinkers, and so we don't want to do anything unless we can do it exactly right, but then we invariably get to a point at which we think "well I need to do this anyway" so we end up worse off than if we'd just done a reasonably laid back, even halfhearted sway! Do the doable!

    Walking is great and is in fact my preferred form of exercise since people get hurt doing more intense exercise.

    I would very much hesitate adding cal-mag unless you're cutting back on diet. I have seen tons of opposites in the group of people who don't do diet but do take cal-mag supplements (we don't do that on this site, but there were many people when I was on InGender who did that and got scads of boys). Cal-mag (especially with Vit. D added) were shown in the best study ever done on maternal diet and gender conceived (and literally the only study ever done that wasn't made by someone selling cal-mag for swaying!) found higher intake of ALL nutrients including cal-mag to sway blue. I understand it's hard for people to give up on cal mag, so I allow it for people who are eating lower nutrients anyway, but it makes me very, very nervous when people who aren't dieting otherwise (even on vegetarian diets) add in the cal mag, if that makes any sense. So I would either do diet and add in calmag if you feel the burning need to take it (without Vit. D) or keep with vegetarian diet and skip the cal-mag.
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  4. #24
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    Thank you again!

    So—you start the E4D right after your period, hopefully conceiving before ovulation. Right?

    That’s probably a good plan, since my ovulation and periods have been wonky. And it puts less pressure on me to figure out the ovulation thing perfectly.

    As far as diet goes...this makes me nervous. I’ve been primarily vegetarian since well before my first son was born. I’ve eaten about 80-90% vegetarian for 10 years and still conceived 3 sons. I also basically accidentally followed the LE diet before my last son, because I had a horrific bronchitis/pneumonia thing for months and lost my appetite during the whole thing...I definitely had cut back on calories, lost weight, etc. But I got pregnant towards the tail end of that illness, when I was basically recovered, but still not eating a lot, and I had a boy. I feel like if I’m already doing the vegetarian thing, and I inadvertently had a restricted calorie diet with one pregnancy, and still had three boys...will it really help?

    I also know that I got pregnant with one attempt with all three of them.

    So again. One attempt. Vegetarian diet. Exercising more at that time. (Was exercising quite a bit—regularly going to the gym and taking long walks when I conceived my first son).
    And—3 boys.

    So. I guess we shall see, but...idk.

  5. #25
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    Yes that's right, you start the e4d after your period ends to have the pattern in place so you aren't thinking about it any more before the egg drops.

    You can't technically conceive before ovulation but yes most people will end up BD before ovulation occurs and will conceive from sperm that's hanging around in the reproductive tract.

    Swaying is like an iceberg, the stuff we see (diet, exercise, for example) is simply the stuff that's above the water. There are dozens if not hundreds of things that have occurred over your entire life that might affect a sway, and additionally there is a huge luck component to this. Think about it - if diet and exercise ALONE could ever make 100% a particular gender or anywhere close to it, the entire human race would have died out a long time ago. We seem to have an upper ceiling of swaying of about 70-75% but considering many of us are going from 70-75% likely to have boys, getting to that point is a massive sway!!!

    My point in telling you this is to explain you can't just look at your diet and throw up your hands and say "ok well diet obviously doesn't work for me" because it very well may have worked for you for all you know. You may have gotten to 60% likely to have a girl with diet (particularly when you were ill) and then you rolled the dice and Lady Luck still had her part to play. Or it may ave been that there were other things that swayed blue for you that countered the diet, or some combination of the two. We just can't know, and so I always come back to the idea of doing what has worked for most people, most of the time.

    My preference would be of course for you to do the full LE Diet for 12 weeks plus exercise as that's what gives us the best results. But you don't have time to do that and don't seem to want to, so I offered you the vegetarian option instead as some people have had some success doing that instead. I don't think it's as good a sway, but our results and studies have shown it can affect the gender ratio (plus it doesn't mess with your head like LE Diet can, in that control freakish way that may sway blue, and I feel like maybe you might struggle with that to some extent) I think it's a viable option for you and is certainly better than doing nothing.

    I can't give you a guarantee. I wish I had that in my power. I don't. Swaying only gets us so far and like I said, there are things that come into play like the control freakishness that are beyond our ability to change, that may affect the outcome. But what I do know is that not doing diet/exercise has far lower results than doing them, and we can't rely on one attempt to carry the day alone (at least not to get you your best chance).

    I'm just trying to find the road between operating within your parameters and you having the best sway I can, and if you're set on trying in a particular month and don't want to do diet, your best bet is simply going vegetarian and having one attempt. That's all. No guarantee but it will help boost your chances, regardless of what has occurred in the past.
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  6. #26
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    Thanks again. I’m sorry I’ve been so annoying!
    Appreciate you taking the time to type everything out for me.
    I understand what you’re saying and apologize for my control-freak, doubting tendencies.

  7. #27
    Swaying Advice Coach
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    Oh gosh not at all, I apologize if my post came off that way! I PROMISE, virtualy all my pink swayers (myself included) have tendencies that way and your questions were in no way out of the norm whatsoever. I mention the control-freakishness not in any way as a rebuke, but simply because it's something I've seen potentially affecting a sway (where people who are getting super wound up over details end up having opposites, and those who manage to remain more chill are more likely to have successful sways. If I didn't warn you guys about that, I'd invariably have people going down the rabbithole where they're planning out their entire life months in advance without even realizing that might have negative ramifications on their sway. (especially since this type of thing is encouraged on the other sites.)
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  8. #28
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    No, you’re fine! I just looked at my responses from your perspective and how annoying I must be! 😆

    I really do appreciate your help and am going to implement your suggestions. Even if I don’t have the full 12 weeks, it’ll be a couple months. I’m going to try to stick to a LE diet or at least continue vegetarian, and will do the e4d technique. (Another stupid question...let’s say my period ends on day 6. Would that I mean I would do day 7, 11, 15, 19, 23?)

    Again, much appreciation.

  9. #29
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    7/10/13/16 in the "every 72 hours" pattern (better chance conception, possibly lower chance of pink

    or

    7/11/15/19 in the "every 96 hours" pattern (better chance of pink, lower chance of conception)
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  10. #30
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    Thanks a bunch.

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