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Thread: One attempt?

  1. #1
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    One attempt?

    Hi there,

    Hoping to get a reply soon as I’m trying this month!

    I’m reading so much on this forum about one attempt for girl sway

    Question is old discussions I’m reading atomic saying not to abstain but now I’m reading atomic is saying to abstain under 35 and have one BD.

    Can you confirm atomic?

    We are young.

    Do I get DH to abstain and have one BD on positive peak? First darkest line when testing or the darkest line (being peak)
    Or do I do it 2 day cut off?

    I’ve read soooo much about cut offs and abstaining and have no clue when is best to actually BD

    Thanks a lot!


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  2. #2
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    It's really helpful if in these instances you can post a link to the discussion you read. Many times the person I'm replying to had some sort of special circumstances going on where they couldn't/should't do abstain.

    The thing with abstain is, it probably doesn't work, is terrible for sperm quality, and really cuts odds of concepion (plus husbands hate it which is a whole other issue.) So some couples can't do abstain, and I'm fine with everyone who wants to, skipping it since it doesn't work anyway.

    BUT, a lot of people especially starting out want to feel like they've tried everything they've heard of to sway. Most people under 35 do want to at least try to do abstain, so I keep it in the mix for anyone who can do it. Not everyone can or should, and I suspect that whatever you read was me talking to a person who had something that made abstain a bad idea for them.

    So, long story short, if you want to abstain, that's fine since your husband is under 35. If not, that's fine too.

    But above all else, do just one attempt. The one attempt works. Abstain and timing do not work. Keep one attempt as long as you can while dropping other less effective tactics.

    My personal suggestion for everyone is to do the one attempt at FIRST positive OPK (not darkest) to start out with. Cutoffs don't work and what's worse, people notice their cycles changing a lot when swaying and so trying for a cutoff is very dicey since you may ovulate an entirely different cycle day than you have in the past.

    But of course it is of course up to you, and if you feel like you can't live without at least trying a cutoff, go for it - but be sure to do OPK too in case you ovulate later than you think you will. That way you can still attempt (if it's 4 or more days after your last attempt, that is)
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