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Thread: My weird cluster theory
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November 22nd, 2020, 09:10 AM #1
My weird cluster theory
For some time now I’ve been developing this weird cluster theory that’s been bothering me - in a certain group of women only so many can have kids if the same gender. I can’t explain it, so I’ll give examples. For instance we are 13 colleagues (all women) in my team at work and after I got pregnant with my DS2, five more colleagues had babies- all of them girls. What would be my chance to have a girl after five consecutive girls in the team!!! It’s really bugging me, you know a sixth girl in a row, seems improbable to me...Just like in my DS1 kindergarten group- before I got pregnant all second babies in the families of the group were female, so I thought Well I could be the next on the girl queue... well I wasn’t. It was like the quota for a girl was over. I am strict on my LE diet (15 weeks now), in my brisk walking for at least 60 mins 5-7 days a week, will stick to one attempt but the facts still sing to me- sixth in a row, don’t be delusional. Please point to me some facts that could break my theory... It makes me despair in my swaying
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November 22nd, 2020, 09:46 AM #2
I totally understand what you are saying. The girl quota! Sorry mam, we are out of girls today But I think the only answer to this is: look at another peer group? Look at your yoga class buddys or your neighbours etc.
I am with you, 14 weeks on the LE. Keep strong!
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November 22nd, 2020, 11:57 AM #3Swaying Advice Coach
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The gender of other people's babies don't affect the gender of yours. For some reason we see "runs" like that sometimes but it doesn't mean anything. Just like Slingers suggests, look at OTHER groups you're a part of and you'll see that in other places you're surrounded by all boys or a mix.
If you look at big families like the Duggars, you can see long runs of one gender and then long runs of the other. This is in the same family!!
In my extended family we had whole bunch of boys in a row, then a whole bunch of girls, then more boys again. It's just that we notice it when it stands out.!!! Questions?? Check out the NEW and improved Complete Index !!!
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November 22nd, 2020, 03:52 PM #4
It’s just that this is the only group I am currently a part of, when the last one got pregnant I was thinking- great, they want a boy, I see her with a boy, now there will be a boy to break the girl thread and then it will finally be my turn to be girl-ready. When she announced a girl I was like- whaaat, you stole my girl chances! Purely logically I comprehend the fact that what I get doesn’t depend on other families’ kids, but it’s really kept bothering me since my last “peer” group model.
My first attempt for a girl will be in the next few days and I am a bit scared that meanwhile nobody from work got pregnant with a boy to break the circle and that the role will be passed to me
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November 23rd, 2020, 10:53 AM #5Swaying Advice Coach
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I understand it's hard not to think that way. But I suspect that even if they'd had all boys, you'd be thinking "there's something in the water, we will all have boys" and if they had mixed genders you'd be counting to see if there were even numbers of boys and girls, which one was "due" to come up, that kind of thing.
These are just tricks our brains play on us. Those of us with boys especially, we want to control our universe so we are always looking for patterns in everything so we can guard against them. But this has the downside of making us see patterns that aren't there! (my husband often chastises me for this!)!!! Questions?? Check out the NEW and improved Complete Index !!!
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November 23rd, 2020, 04:23 PM #6
I know what you mean. My son is the only boy in our extended family, everyone else has all girl families! It feels like we couldn't also be so lucky?
But the odds of 6 girls in a row (assuming 50/50 odds for each pregnancy, and all independent events) is exactly the same as the odds of g-g-g-g-g-b, both have a 1/64 chance of happening.
It's the same as if you flipped a coin 6 times, the chance of 6 heads in a row is 1/64, but once the first 5 heads are thrown, the next one still has a 50/50 chance of being either heads or tails. It feels like you should be "due for a tails after all those heads", but really it's still a 50% chance.
With a group of babies, it is more likely to have a mix of genders than all of one, just because there's so many more ways of making a mixed combination (such as gbgbgb, ggbbgg, gbggbg, gbbbbg, bbgbgb, bgbgbb, etc etc), but there's only one gggggg or bbbbbbb. 1/64 chance of all girls, 1/64 chance of all boys, and 62/64 chance of having a mix of some sort.
...I like mathsswaying for a girl
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November 24th, 2020, 01:21 AM #7
Thanks, guys, I realise it’s all in my head... I didn’t realise that this was another part of my control freakishness now I’m thinking - with my first attempt within the next several days I haven’t managed to cope with it, it may ruin my sway. I have about two days to beat it...
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November 24th, 2020, 02:49 AM #8
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November 24th, 2020, 11:19 PM #9
I was weirdly worried about this kind of thing when I was pregnant! I had it in my head that certain months or moon phases were good for girls and I had missed them. I’d see a failed girl sway that was like mine in some way and assume it meant my sway was destined to fail. I’d see a rush of girls born a month before mine and assume it meant I missed the girl month. If someone was due with a boy the same week as me I would panic. I actually looked up the hashtag for my weeks gestation to try to determine if there was a decent amount of girls due. All this stuff is certifiably nuts. But I did it anyway 😂
2007 2009 2011
Prayed and swayed for a little
2020 I still can’t believe we have a girl!!
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November 25th, 2020, 12:27 AM #10
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