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March 30th, 2013, 08:17 PM #1
Has anyone ever just wanted a baby?
I was just diagnosed with a chemical pg. I'm still waiting for bleeding to start. Beta was 19.8 to 8.9 in 2 days. I really wanted a girl at first and did ht. i've never been more devastated in my life. I've never had a loss before. I've always conceived easily. Now I just want a baby more than a girl. Has anyone ever experienced this or is this just the grief talking? Has anyone conceived easily after a chemical?
I'm 33 yrs old. I hope my bleeding does not start tom. What a crappy Easter it's going to be. I'm still hoping for a miracle but in my head, i know I'm not pg anymore.
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March 31st, 2013, 12:16 AM #2
I do not have any advice for you, but I wanted you to know I am thinking of you xxx.
I remember when I had a m/c, I remember feeling like I was in shock and so called 'helpful' people telling me that there was probably something wrong with it and it was Gods decision. What a lot of utter crap.
Please take the time to be kind to yourself, talk to people who will listen to how you are feeling.
Wishing you all the best xxx.
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March 31st, 2013, 04:26 AM #3Dream Vet
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Yes my first pregnancy ended in a M/C at 10 weeks, i was hoping for a girl but after that happened i just wanted a healthy baby. I ended up getting DD next time around. Then we wanted a boy and were swaying for a year, 9 months of BFNs i decided any baby would do, didn't care about sex so much and got DS. Dont give up on your dream, i know it is horrible to lose a pregnancy, but it will all work out in the end.
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March 31st, 2013, 04:42 AM #4Dreamer
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My second and third pregnancy ended in miscarriage at 8 weeks. The first time was horrible and after reading about LE I'm pretty sure that would be a girl as I was eating very unhealthy, like just rice cakes at lunch, skip breakfast etc. second time not too bad but after that I just want to get pregnant! I did not suffer GD when I found out it was a boy, in fact my ds1 knew it was a boy bf any of us so I was sort of prepared as they said the first born always can tell the sex of the baby. It is great when there is no pressure for what ever gender. Now I am trying for a pink one I do 't know how ill feel if I don't get it.
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March 31st, 2013, 06:12 AM #5
my first pregnancy also ended in MC and I just wanted a baby more than anything. I still had a pink preference as my next pregnancy progressed passed that point, but was thrilled when we had our DS1
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March 31st, 2013, 06:28 AM #6
Yes, I totally understand where you're coming from. So sorry you lost the baby I didn't care for my second child's gender after I lost my daughter. I dreamed of a daughter, but a baby, any baby, would be soooo great. I just needed someone to take care of, someone to cuddle, feed, kiss and hug. However, I still long for a daughter. Someone biological closest to the child I lost. My boys remind me of her so much, they are so precious. I would continue my life being happy if it were just them. But at some times I feel I NEED a daughter to be happier. To get back what was taken from me. To take care of her and experience both genders. So if this is your last child, I would really consider going HT again. Or sway for a girl. There are no guarantees, but at least you've tried. Hugs to you mama!
Mummy to a girl, born sleeping & two gorgeous & loud little boys
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April 1st, 2013, 10:00 PM #7
After my first 12 week loss, I conceived my DS#2 and had no gender preference. After my second loss, I conceived my DS#3 with no gender preference.
After many more losses, I conceived my 5th boy. Sadly, he was lost at 12 weeks and after him, I wanted another boy. But somewhere inside, I still wanted a girl because I don't have one. Then I go back to wanting a boy. DRats!!!
None of this is easy...its just best to let it go and let the chips fall. Having all hopes and dreams pinned on a gender just isn't a fullfilling purpose in life and personally I really hope there is more to me than never feeling "complete" just because I didn't *get* a certain gender. Thats my attitude anyway.
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April 1st, 2013, 10:10 PM #8
First, I want to say sorry about your loss! I had a chemical pregnancy back in November and got pregnant 2 weeks later. I counted my first day of bleeding (Thanksgiving) as CD1 and then started OPK's everyday. I ovulated on CD16 and conceived. I was not swaying. I just wanted to get pregnant! And now I am 19 weeks pregnant. I just wanted to let you know you can get pregnant again and I found no evidence of good reasons to wait. It helped me move on and heal! best of luck to you and I hope you feel well!
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April 10th, 2013, 08:24 AM #9
I wanted a little girl and was told that my baby had passed and it was a girl ! We found out I had lost our son.... I just wanted him back. I didn't give a dam about his penis I wanted him back! To this day if they said girl or him it would be a healthy him for sure! I have never been trough Ivf but I can imagine it wasn't exactly a walk in the park and then to find it worked and been ripped away in an instant I can sympathise and suspect what your feeling is normal but just give your self some time to grieve! Sex dosn't seem to matter when everything is weighed out it is just some people don't have to weigh it out and they get a little to obsessed in my opinion! Not so much here but a lot on other sites!
Hoping for a pink rainbow!
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April 17th, 2013, 03:27 AM #10
My first two pregnancies were miscarriages. I never knew the genders. That was almost 10 years ago. I now have 4 sons. I've had a total of 8 miscarriages (one loss was twin girls). I completely understand how you feel. With my four sons I had so many pregnancy complications. My body just sucks at baking babies and it's been hard to come to terms with.
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