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  1. #11
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    I would say find out in this case. I personally lean on the preference of not finding out as I think the surprise gender on the day is overtaken by hormones and complexity of birth. However, as you have looked at nub guesses I think it’s best to know now. You’ll just keep thinking if you don’t. Best to know now I think - it will be what it will be.


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  3. #12
    Swaying Advice Coach
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    Geez. I think that is leg bone and cord and not the penis AT ALL. Penises at 12 weeks do not look like that at all whatsoever. I think that guess is entirely wrong (even though the baby can of course still be a boy) because the alleged "penis" is coming out of the middle of the stomach and that long stick looking think literally could not be genitals at all due to the size and direction of it. In my opinion, that picture is not at all suitable for guessing and they shouldn't have guessed on that.
    Last edited by atomic sagebrush; October 1st, 2019 at 12:54 PM.
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  4. #13
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    I Thought that thing in top could be the nub or partly. But maybe not. Hope not and that this is a girl
    Single mom of 3 and done!
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  5. #14
    Swaying Advice Coach
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    IMO it's way too high for the nub. It could only be nub if it was attached to that long huge thing, and that would be the most well hung baby in human history, LOL>
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  6. #15
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    I’m 21 weeks pregnant and decided not to find out at my scan last week as like you I’m hoping for a girl and didn’t want to feel disappointed the rest of the pregnancy if they told me the baby was a boy. I’m hoping I’d take the news better at birth if it’s a boy.
    I don’t see a nub in either of your pics so I’m surprised you’ve had any boy guesses so you still have a good shot at the baby being a girl.
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  8. #16
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    I never found out until birth with ds1, didn't really have a preference then, both DH and I thought he was a boy so I wasn't surprised. With DS2 I swayed girl hard for 6 months mths. Wasn't going to find out gender but he had a very obvious boy nub at 12 weeks and flashed us at 20 wk scan despite me saying to tech we didn't want to know gender. I knew he was a boy. I was devastated at first and DH was adamant he was a girl but I just knew and birth I had come to terms with that and loved him already. If I hadn't known (was sure my girl sway had worked until I saw scans) I would have been devastated when he was born.
    With DD1 she was our surprise baby. I didn't know whether to find out gender or not (was disappointed for a large portion of DS2s pregnancy once I found out but eventaually grew to accept it by the time he was born). I had NT scan early as I didn't want to see obvious boy bits like with DS 2. Then at my 20 week scan I wanted tech to write down gender so I could look when I was ready but she said it was against policy to write it so I didn't find out. I spent the next 4 weeks sleepless obsessisong over scan and not knowing and as I had to have extra growth scans due to a placenta issue (scared I would lose Bub altogether) I asked at 24 week scan as it was affecting my health and mental health so much not knowing (I was the person who always swore I would always have a surprise and never find out gender early). I found out she was my longed for DD and I am so glad I found out as the guessing and not knowing was killing me.
    I hope you work out what is best for you x

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  10. #17
    Swaying Advice Coach
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    I know some people fear finding out because they think "this will cause me stress during pregnancy and stress is bad for a baby!" But those same people stress and obsess endlessly because they didn't find out!! They get just as upset (in many cases, completely unwarranted) and end up peering at ultrasound photos in tears because they're so sure they're having an opposite. But what is worse is when they do all that obsessing only to end up sure they're having what they were wishing for only to end up getting some really shocking news in the delivery room. This has ended very badly for a couple people so I really do urge you guys to find out unless you are 1000% sure you won't get your hopes up or end up in despair when you don't know gender.
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  12. #18
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    Thank you all ladies for your advice.
    Scan date tomorrow so hopefully we’ll be able to find out and I can stop obsessing one way or the other!

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  14. #19
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    And it’s a boy!

    Really pleased to say that I don’t feel upset, and happy I can start to imagine what the years ahead might look like and delighted to be giving my boy a brother.

    Only sad bit is parting with my little dream and wishing that wasn’t overshadowing my joy right now.

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  16. #20
    Swaying Advice Coach
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    Huge congrats!!! I think boys should come in pairs like shoes, LOL.
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