March 2ww

[SweetLily]

Tarasue--totally normal. I had that with all my babies and noticed a marked change in my body by baby 3--its like it had the whole baby thing down pat and I had every symptom in the book from day 1! It was crazy. Tyr not to worry, its actually probably a good sign that the pregnancy is going well.

Sage, glad you got the course figured out. The testing only is different because they do the 21 day test on 7 dpo, the 21 day test ASSUMES you are 7 dpo. if you go at 7 dpo your results ill be the same. And day 3 is easy to count, day 3 is day 3. period. Lol.

DH's visit has been lovely. I havent said anything, I bloat fairly often anyway. I want to know for sure one way or another before I tell him. He cries so much when I have an mc, hes more upset than I am and I cant put him through more stress than he is already under right now. I will test again in a couple of days. the 4-5 week mark is where it always goes bad.

Thanks xx, you're a sweetie.

have a wonderful day ladies!

[sageviolet]

xx, snow delay, I won't get the book until later today. I will definitely share what I learn!

Here's your ttc obsession for today: Making Babies Program There's a book called "Making Babies" that is also along the lines of Chinese med and recommends acupuncture. I saw the preview on Amazon and a link to their online quiz.

SweetLily, FX for you!

My update: So frustrated and depressed. Why does my cm always dry up at o? :-(
This cycle I did epo or eating a whole grapefruit, alternating each day. I had oodles of creamy cm starting right after af and the past 2 days it has become more watery and is just barely there, nothing on tp, I have to use a finger. And I predict I'll have gobs of stretchy stuff in the 2ww again.
Why does this happen every month? Ugh, I cannot find this scenario anywhere. Can someone recommend a book or website? It's not that I lack cm, it just goes away when I need it most! I haven't had ewcm at o since before dd. It actually didn't go all the way to my best ewcm when she was conceived, but it was definitely more abundant than this.
And in case you forgot, I have tried cough medicine when this watery state happens and it does nothing but bring up some mucus in my lungs when breathing heavy during bding, lol.

Forgot to add my other grumbles for today: I am convinced dd waking up at night is an indicator of o time, lol! She's started waking up at night again the past couple of nights. And last night I probably messed up my temp because I started cuddling dh and getting warm from him, something I usually don't do for fear of messing up my temp, but I was so depressed about my cm I figured why care. So that's what's up with my chart in case you're wondering.

[SweetLily]

So this morning's test was a bfn. I guess we do need that appointment with the RE on April 1. I just dont understand why this keeps happening. But glad I didn't tell dh and stress him out, it would have been really hard on him. He gets very upset over dead babies as he put it.

[maidentomother]

Maiden, *hugs*! Have you thought about going high tech with donor sperm? Costly, but you might have better results and you could shop for some good genes.

Yes, I have considered this seriously and if I'm not pregnant by April I will probably go this route. The big issue is that I'm completely opposed to anonymous donor sperm, it MUST come from a man I've met in person and I'm very picky. I would rather foster to adopt than use anonymous donor sperm. I was created by AI from a known donor so it's a big deal to me. Unfortunately DFis opposed to IVF, he won't even do AI, he thinks children should only be created by sex which I find hurtful. Oh and I am not okay with ICSI which goes against my beliefs, and few clinics allow natural fertilization to my knowledge.

It looks like we will be O buddies again this cycle! Hopefully BFP/DD buddies, too. As for CM drying up at O, that is EXTREMELY common. Often it dries up days BEFORE O. As long as you BD plenty before O, when your CM is plentiful, there shouldn't be an issue. My cervix almost always closes before O and often my CM dries up in advance, too. That is the norm.

Grace, I'm so sorry your DH is being difficult too. DF was able to come through yesterday but I'm still really upset, bc I wanted to have attempts on O-4 and O-1, and now we will only have an attempt on O-2 (I just got my Peak & positive OPK today). I know it's possible to conceive with one attempt but we've tried that for 7 cycles with no luck, so I really wanted to up our chances this month. I'm almost positive he has low sperm count and maybe other sperm issues. But I don't want to sway blue by risking attempts closer than 3 days apart. It infuriates me that the timing could have been perfect but wasn't just bc he was in a bitchy mood.

tarasue, YES, that is it exactly! I'm a pretty sexual person, so once I get into it everything's fine bc my brain just shuts off amd all I do is feel in the moment (I seriously could have been a porn star lol), but in order to WANT to have sex in the first place I need to be in the right head space emotionally. And DF and I are are extremely incompatible emotionally. We annoy each other constantly and he used to make me cry several times a week just by saying hurtful things (he is very emotionally immature and the type to lash out).

I haven't had backaches in any of my pregnancies personally but they ars one of THE most common early pg symptoms so I'd consider thrm a good sign. Plus as you know pregnancies can differ greatly and each one is unique. Fx all is well in there!

XX, Taytum & Sweet, I'm going to try my hardest to find a new donor for next cycle. I'm hoping I'll be on clomid/femara and I really don't want to risk messing up or wasting a medicated cycle, as well as the LAST cycle I'll be TTC for a while. And if I do get clomid/femara I will be doing more and more frequent attempts, hopefully starting around CD3, and clearly I can't rely on DF since he couldn't even handle 3 attempts 3 days apart! I've definitely been swaying way too long to have it all be for nothing.

Sweet, what's going on with your father? How long has he been living with you? I hear you on feeling crazy emotional; I have been so upset and angry about the situation with DF (and his failure to finish despite BDing 3x in a day; he also couldn't come the first time we tried to BD this cycle and he wouldn't try until the following day). Twice I've cried myself to sleep over his bullshit. He tried to blame losing his erection on me, twice. It was obviously lies bc he kept changing his story! First I was 'too into it' and he claimed he thought I was faking my enjoyment (which I would never do, as he knows, I was just super horny) and then later he said it was bc I wasn't wearing perfume (I used to collect perfume and he HATES when I wear it).

I am so, so sorry about the BFN. It kills me that this keeps happening to you.

Junie, and anyone/everyone else who expressed sympathy and support, THANK YOU! I would probably be having a complete mental breakdown without you ladies to talk to and comfort me. I have no one else in my life I can talk to about this stuff.

[tarasue]

I would definitely be looking into a different sperm doner if he makes you cry, you don't need people like that in your life! You deserve better Maiden!


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[djmommy]

KIMG0044.jpg

Not sure if the pic uploaded it I got a package today and of course this stood out!

Good luck to everyone. Hope this is a good sign.

[djmommy]

OOOHHH....sorry it's so large!! LOL

[TaytumJ]

Sage: I hear you! I feel like I get more "slippery" and not EWCM at all. Or, last time, I got one days worth of EWCM, followed by two days of super creamy before a really obvious temp change (I still am not sure which day I actually O'd, but EWCM definitely wasn't on the day of the temp change.) I've heard of people trying Evening Primrose? I don't know what your supplement looks like (or if that sways pink?) but just something I've heard other people trying. Or Preseed?

Maiden - I completely understand your feelings about it. I can see where that would be infuriating, especially as you've been working at this and have it down to a science and now it must seem like DF is sabotaging it. I do agree with tarasue as well; you definitely don't deserve to be treated like that or made to cry, hopefully this cycle is the ONE and then you don't have to worry about this any more! I have everything crossed for you! Hoping this is the last cycle and a BFP with a sticky bean is on its way!

DJMommy - LOVE it! Someone else on another site I follow ordered something and they got a bag of "baby dust" with little stars in it. So cute!

Sweetlily: I'm so sorry for your loss. It never gets any easier. Thoughts and prayers with you.

My update: Temp seems to be climbing (I HOPE tomorrow is the temp spike!!) Today I feel really "slippery", so I hope that's a sign, too. I didn't get a chance to sneak away and do an OPK today, so I won't know until later. I almost DON'T want to take one, in case it's still faint - I might just BD tonight and wake up tomorrow and see what happens. I feel good about this and I don't want to dash any hopes.

Side note: a friend of mine got pregnant a year ago, but miscarried about 5 weeks. For the past year she's been obsessive over getting pregnant again. By the time I knew about all of this and we talked about it, I told her I thought it was just a timing issue and we would work together to try to time it better this time around. She was just really impatient though and went to the doctor and got Clomid. She did get pregnant on her first try on Clomid, but had her U/S today and she's having twins! Which was exactly what she wanted to avoid on Clomid haha. Funny though!

[Junie]

I'm so sorry Sweetlily
Hang in there Maiden this could still be your BFP cycle!

[maidentomother]

Thank you tarasue & Taytum! I know I deserve better, I only put up with him bc I'm so damn picky and so desperate to be pregnant. But increasingly I'm thinking it's just not worth it. I've worked so hard to separate myself from toxic people in my life, too hard to be abused.

Taytum, not sure if I've mentioned it before but I (and DF who hates all lubes) love YesBaby organic sperm friendly lube. I can barely distinguish the feel from my own fertile CM, which is worlds apart from any other lube. I also have ridiculously sensitive skin, everywhere, and am prone to YIs, but have had no issues using YB, even multiple times a day, days in a row. Highly recommend if ever needed! Even when I have plenty of my own internal CM, I'll sometimes use a bit of YB externally so no foreplay is needed (since I'm OCD and always wash my ladyparts thoroughly right before BD). Or I just lightly lube up DF.

I hope you see a positive OPK and we can be O buddies or almost O buddies. Btw, I REALLY recommend you BD every other day, starting today, until 7DPO, to maximize your chances of blue. Once you get a positive OPK, it would be even better if you can BD daily that same day and the next 3-4.

Funny about your friend...serves her right! But I hope everything goes well. Twin pregnancies can be SO scary.

I've gotten sparkly 'baby dust' (all blue unfortunately!) with orders from BabyHopes.com, which is a great site. I miss them! The OPKs here are SO bad.

Junie, thanks! I would love to O tonight or early tomorrow...or else in 2 days so I can attempt again. I am so tempted to BD more/before then...I am getting so desperate, been slacking a bit on the diet (snacking a sometimes, not having long enough overnight between meals, eating more overall) and gaining a little weight, so I particularly need to get pg this month. Plus if I have a son, my very first choice would be a saggitarius.