I feel like the whole world knows the gender

[wildwooddays]

Everyone is telling me it's a boy. I've heard everything from the way I'm carrying looks like a boy to "If you have two of the same you are more likely to have a third of the same" First of all, why gender seems to matter is beyond me since I'm the one having this, not them. Also it is kind of making me depressed. As much as I keep thinking I'll be okay with either gender, and of course I will love it just as much if it's another boy, I guess I still have some hope for a girl and I keep thinking these people must be right if they are all saying it.
I need some tips on feeling okay about having another boy.

[Amberlilly55]

I have three little boys. With my third I wanted a girl so bad. We didn't do anything to sway because I hadn't even heard of it then. After we left the ultrasound and we found out we were having another boy I couldn't help but cry. I like you knew that I would of course love the baby no matter it's gender and most importantly I wanted a healthy baby. I wasn't sad because it was another boy. I was sad because I was mourning the fact that I might never have a daughter. I so long for a mother/daughter relationship.

If you are having another boy it is ok for you to be sad about it. It doesn't mean that you will love the baby any less and really it is no one's business how you feel. Once you are holding that perfect little bundle in your arms all that will matter is that he/she is healthy and there with you. I of course hope that you get the gender that you desire but more importantly a healthy baby! :bighug:

[wildwooddays]

Thank you Amber!

[ladymclemore]

Ugh, I'm sorry! Some people need to learn to keep their comments to themselves! Everyone keeps telling me they think it is a girl just because all of the grandkids so far are boys. I hate the pressure from everyone else to have the gender THEY want.

[sbmommy]

I wish people would realize for one second how insensitive their comments really are. I think many people would be horrified if they knew just how much their words hurt us.

And as for you carrying like a boy - that's a bunch of baloney. I'm 6 1/2 months pregnant right now and EVERYONE tells me they know I am having a boy because of the way I'm carrying... and from my 19 week ultrasound, this baby is without a doubt a girl. I tell people no, I'm definitely having another girl, and they look so surprised because I'm carrying differently than I did with my first girl. So you can carry differently and end up with the same sex, and you can carry the same and end up with the opposite sex!

Still, I understand how much the comments hurt. When I tell people it's another girl, they give me the required smile and "ah!"... then they look at me with such pity and all of them say "so are you going to keep going? To try and get your boy?" I'm 38 and my husband is 42, and we haven't even given birth to this girl - what is the right way to respond? Tell people no, we're too old and not financially or physically capable of keeping up with three kids under the age of 5? Or tell them no, we're happy and complete without our boy, which is a lie too? I should just say hey, you're hurting me and making my GD worse. I'm going to go sit in my car and cry now, and mourn the loss of the son I never got to have.

[hotdogz&boyz]

People are generally just trying to talk to fill up time. This is what I have discovered. If it is pouring rain outside and 30 degrees and you mention what "awesome weather" you are having (not sarcastically, someone will agree that the weather is truly "cool" when its like that). If you mention pregnancy...you are pretty much screwed. Everyone has an opinion. From what number child it is ("wow, three? Isn't two the "norm"" or "geez, are you trying to have a football team?" or "only your first, you have a lot to learn") to age gaps ("wow, three under three, you are nuts!" to "oh, I was wondering when you were going to give so-n-so a sibling") to gender ("you have a girl, you must want a boy!" of "three boys...wow...must be another boy" to "oh, one of each, why have another?"). People have NO filter. Best case, hide pregnancy until week 16, claim you know the gender after that even if you dont have a clue and say you arent sharing it with anyone. I have found it very effective at lessening the comments.

But yeah, it sucks. And no, they don't have to be "right" just cause they are all saying it. 90% of my friends and family thought my second was a girl....wrong-o. Its a guess, plain and simple. Don't make it mean more. And you will adapt if it is a third boy. Just give yourself time to grieve the daughter you aren't having and prepare for a third son. Most people find the disappointment lessens or disappears shortly after birth.