PDA

View Full Version : "We only make boys"



CattyPad
November 19th, 2014, 11:51 AM
That what my mother in law said to me, whilst shrugging with a "I pity you" expression on her face when I said I was hoping for a girl next. Nice huh?

Oh and she doesn't even know I am pregnant yet! We are going to announce it this weekend.

So I am hoping for a little reassurance here....because I still have hope. This will be our second and final baby. I had very bad GD with my first but luckily I fell in love when he was born. But I know GD would hit again if this one is another boy, cause I don't get more chances.

My mil wanted to have boys only, and she got boys only. She knows I want a girl real bad so that comment really was really out of place don't you think? And surely what she had has NOTHING to do with me?? Reassure me please! My own mother had one boy followed by four girls! My sisters, one has two girls, the other two boys. And my husbands brother has a boy and a girl.

We swayed for a girl this time, but I got pregnant the first month TTC! With my DS it took us twelve months, meaning my sway for this current baby only lasted one month and I am now doubting myself. My intUition....some days I am really sure it's a boy, some others I am really sure it's a girl, so that's out of the window.
As for symptoms, I feel worse this time round, my nausea is hideous, but after a lot of research I see that doesn't mean a lot?

Excuse my long rant...I am just kinda vulnerable you know...hormones!
Thanks for reading guys :)
Ps. Wasn't sure where to post this..?

atomic sagebrush
November 19th, 2014, 12:01 PM
Yep, not a nice thing to say. She doesn't realize it I'm sure, but I understand that it is hurtful.

Biologically, she's just dead wrong. It isn't true and while I've explained this in more depth in other places on the site, briefly, men are made of XY cells that divide into X and Y (50-50) and that is just how it works. I have seen dozens of people get conned into having "their husband's sperm checked" by charlatan doctors and it's ALWAYS been about 50-50 (tiny variations thru sheer random chance, of course)

Anyone who "only made boys" would have been eliminated from the gene pool a long time ago. GEneticists have studied DNA and found that of all the men who ever lived, only 40% have surviving descendants, while 80% of all the women who ever lived, have surviving descendants. And there have been countless times where all the males in a tribe, village, or even entire countries were wiped out or very nearly so by wars or conquerors. Your genes want to survive and that anyone's genes would "tie themselves" to only making boys, when they are at a 50% disadvantage to begin with and run the risk of being wiped out any time - those genes simply would not have survived to the present day.

Your genes favor having the gender that has the best shot of survival. That changes as the environment changes and anyone, esp. with only one boy - you need never feel like you are 'SET' for one gender or the other. Some of us get girls after 4-5-6 boys and 20 years so please don't despair, you have as good a chance as anyone

CattyPad
November 19th, 2014, 04:36 PM
Thank you atomic :heart: you are always so kind and helpful.

I am so worried at the moment...! Not long to go until I find out so in guess its freaking out time. Which is silly I guess since the baby already has a gender!

Kittybear
November 19th, 2014, 06:02 PM
You still have at least a 50% chance of having a girl, and I really hope is growing in your belly as I type this. :) wishing you the best of luck xxx

txmomof3beautifulboys
November 19th, 2014, 06:10 PM
Good Luck to you :) I hope you get your girl!

Adia
November 19th, 2014, 09:04 PM
Thank you atomic :heart: you are always so kind and helpful.

I am so worried at the moment...! Not long to go until I find out so in guess its freaking out time. Which is silly I guess since the baby already has a gender!

I am right there with you! I keep trying to tell myself that too. The baby already had a gender, I just don't know what it is and will find out soon enough. I am not coping with the build up to the gender determination very well....

I honestly think the 'waiting to find out gender' portion of this process is the most difficult. Getting a BFP seems so easy compared to this stress!

CattyPad
November 20th, 2014, 10:52 AM
I am right there with you! I keep trying to tell myself that too. The baby already had a gender, I just don't know what it is and will find out soon enough. I am not coping with the build up to the gender determination very well....

I honestly think the 'waiting to find out gender' portion of this process is the most difficult. Getting a BFP seems so easy compared to this stress!

Thank you Adia, I see you are right behind me, I am 10w 3d today.... I hVe my monthly check up tomorrow and I am sure he will give me an app for the 12week anatomy scan(is that wht is called, the 12 week one?) that's when they told me my DS gender.

I really want to know,but sometimes wonder if I should not find out so I can carry on living in hope lol. Good luck to you too!

Christi
November 30th, 2014, 01:52 AM
This whole gender waiting thing is like a real life version of the scrodgiers cat scenario. The baby has a gender from the moment of conception, but until we know the gender, the baby is both a boy and a girl in alternate universes. The waiting is killing me...


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Kittybear
November 30th, 2014, 03:07 AM
This whole gender waiting thing is like a real life version of the scrodgiers cat scenario. The baby has a gender from the moment of conception, but until we know the gender, the baby is both a boy and a girl in alternate universes. The waiting is killing me...


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

That is why I have this avatar picture ;) good luck ladies x

CattyPad
November 30th, 2014, 11:50 AM
I know, i just cant stand it anymore, but now I am too scared and I don't know if I want to know!! :(

atomic sagebrush
November 30th, 2014, 12:13 PM
This whole gender waiting thing is like a real life version of the scrodgiers cat scenario. The baby has a gender from the moment of conception, but until we know the gender, the baby is both a boy and a girl in alternate universes. The waiting is killing me...


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Bahaha I literally Loled at this!

My son has a T-shirt that says "Schrodinger's cat, wanted dead and alive."