Why do you want that dream gender, anyway?

[dreaminginblue]

I see it's been a wee while since anyone posted but I want to put my dream out there.
I did not want children. The thought of being responsible for someone else for at least 18 years scared me and I definitely did not want girls. I have 9 siblings; 6 sisters (inc. a set of twins) & 3 brothers (oldest, middle & youngest). Those of us who have gone on to have children have produced 8 girls and 1 boy so far. 3 siblings are currently pregnant and 1 is having her 2nd girl.
The odds were stacked against us to begin with but I had a dream of having boy-girl-boy, none of which I wanted to have August or December birthdays due to the school year cut off and December being all about the 25th.
I was convinced my DD1 was a boy and had boys names and refused to even think of girls names or look at clothes till the 20 week scan. We were having a girl due 15th August. I had GD for a few days and was in shock for the first. I came round to her being a girl when hubby picked out her name; I'm rubbish with girls names.
2nd time round, I had been looking at gender swaying and was hoping to ntnp for 3 months but the moment took us on our anniversary and although we dtd on my o'day, 20 week scan confirmed another girl due 18th December. I did feel different this time, not sick but nauseous and some days it felt like I wasn't pregnant with no symptoms or hunger. I hoped for a boy but as we didn't change anything prior to conception, I made peace with baby being most likely a girl. During that 20wk scan and before we asked about G, baby wouldn't empty their bladder and we seemed to hold our collective breath waiting for it. Luckily baby did and by then we didn't care because she was going to be healthy. I was dismayed by well meaning comments of 'maybe next time' or 'they might have it wrong', and was very protective of her when she was born.
Both my girls were delivered by c-section and big babies with 2nd weighing 10lb 6oz. 2nd was an elective so I think this will probably be our last chance to at least try.
I yearn to give DH a son and my girls the baby brother they ask for. As for me, I've always loved baby boys and I'd love the chance to buy boy stuff for a boy, DD1 is a tomboy like me so has a few boy clothes and toys but its not the same. I just want to know what its like to parent both sexes and complete our family. If it were to be another girl and we'd given the sway a very shot then I'd know we destined to be a daughter household but I wouldn't feel like we were done and would want to try again and I'm not sure I could cope with 4 girls!!!
My friends have come out of a baby boom which consisted of mostly boys with 2 not wanting to share with me as they both had had girls first in same year I'd had DD1 and thought I'd be jealous or upset, I'm more gutted I can't help them or visit due to distance.
In conclusion I just want to have my boy, stop having babies and help, enjoy and watch them all grow.
Though if I succeed in swaying for one boy, I might wonder about swaying for another - sshhhh!

Thanks for reading

[Brinny]

I know the feeling. I didn't really want kids, but once I had my first, I was addicted lol
I had a boy first, so I then felt that a little girl would be great second time around, or at least somewhere in the mix.......
I now have 3 boys, 4.5yo, 2.5yo and 1yo. My sister has girl, boy, girl......

My partner had the snip, so I am unable to sway, although I'm not sure I would risk swaying.

So I am planning to head to Thailand or US for IVF/PGD to select a female to be transferred in late 2014, early 2015

Can't wait to have a baby girl


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[lisvna]

My husband and I always wanted 3 kids. He wanted at least a girl. I wanted at least a boy. We both wanted a mixed family. After our first I had such a hard time that I wasn't sure if we wanted still 3. That's the reason why we went HT. we wanted a mixed family. After transferring boys and girls (ht was a hard road and we weren't sure we could get pregnant at all) we did get another boy. Its was such an easy delivery and such an easy child that we decided to go ahead with trying for a mixed family. I hope we will get there once......

[Fiorefleur]

After our oldest was born I couldn't imagine having another one.

20 months later I had finally given away all of her baby items...then my period was late. I wasn't pregnant but it made us realize we weren't finished.

Dd2 is 7 months young now, we just lost a surprise baby early in the pregnancy...and after seeing our brand new twin nieces...we got baby fever again.

We're hoping to sway for a boy ! I want to be finished by the time I'm 30 next year..hopefully it'll happen.

[Boysway]

As a child growing up in a one child family for most of the time (I have a step-brother that I saw every 2nd weekend). I always wanted 4 kids. I decided I would have a boy first, his name would be Jordan. After my boy, I wanted a girl. I didn't care what gender I got after that.

I fell pregnant with my first child at 17. For months we called my belly Jordan. When we found out we were having a girl, I cried. I was happy she was healthy but, all I wanted was my boy. Thankfully I got used to the idea, I was beyond excited once she came along and wanted another baby right away, lol. I fell pregnant when my eldest was 3 months old. Sadly, that little once wasn't to be and I often wonder if that was my boy. Then came along DD#2 and DD#3 and DD#4. Each time I have had another bub, I have had gender disappointment. In fact up until recently I had forgotten just how much it had an affect on me till I re-read my mothers group post from when I found out we had another girl on the way. I almost sounded distraught knowing I had another girl coming. I do have a nephew and some baby boy second cousins but, it's just not the same,

I just want a little boy to buy cute clothes for, spike his hair up. I can't explain it, I just want my little boy!

ETA: I love my girls to bits, I wouldn't change them for the world.

[motherofboys]

I don't really understand my desire for a girl.
I only have brothers and was a complete tom boy as a child. Although I did beg my mum on several occasions for a little sister. I never wore skirts and dresses, even now at 27 I feel uncomfortable in a skirt and don't know how to do cute girly hair styles.
My dad wasn't around and my step dad was abusive to me. It was drummed into me from a young age (he was around since I was 2 years old) that boys were superior to girls, girls were only good for one thing. For a long time after he began abusing me I wished I was a boy. Then I began wishing I had had older brothers, instead of younger brothers, so I could have been protected rather than the protector. My mother and I have an awful relationship.
I didn't want marriage or kids. When I finally met a man who I trusted and suddenly over night went from wanting no kids to loads, I wanted boys, boys were better, boys were stronger, people didn't abuse boys, but I assumed we'd get a mix. I hoped I had a boy first. Preferably 2 boys first.
So I got my boy, then I got my 2nd boy. Then, oh joy, I got a 3rd boy! My little girl, when she came along was going to be so well protected. I got excited to have a girl, and my best friend had had a daughter around the same time my 3rd arrived. I'd stood in the pink section dreaming of how one day I'd hold my little girl. I started to picture her and imagine what we'd do together. I actually wanted a girl now. The pretty dresses and different range of toys certainly made it seem more appealing too.
We began ttc, and 2 and a half years later I finally got my bfp. This had to be my girl. I wanted her enough and it took so long to conceive that I had to have a girl to make the long wait 'worth it'.
I obviously got a 4th boy, and so here I am.
When I think about it though, aside from doing all those girly things, shopping trips and girly DVDs and buying the pretty frilly clothes, I don't have a fantastic reason or a life long dream for a girl. I don't understand it, I just know my heart aches for her.


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[Fiorefleur]

I never explained why. Wow. Go me . Ha !

I love having my girls and kind of scared of little boys . Lol But a part of me just can't let it go, somehow I want a boy . For my husband I reckon. Plus, there's only 1 grandson out of 6 grand kids on J's side. There's a little competition going on for that. Haha ! His brother tried for 1 more boy and got twin girls...psh !! :-p

Also our 3 year old says she wants a brother ..the other day she picked up my mom'a phone and told the person on the other line that we were going to have a boy . Hahaha. Not right now sweet thing . ;-)


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