All alone on my journey ( except for this forum)

[love being a mummy]

No one knows I am ttc and to make things worse I keep getting comments all the time. I've got 5 kids so I'm used to the comments "so whens the next one" all my other kids have a close ish gap. Closest is 13 months and largest is 2yrs 8months. My youngest is almost 3 years old.

I've been ttc for about 16 months and the whole time I've been getting comments so are you going to have anymore, I thought you would have had more by now.

I put on a brave face and just say you never know or who knows.

I just feel like shouting I'm having problems conceiving, but then I don't want the sorry comments, or the are you crazy you have 5 already.

After I had number 5 a family member of mine ( who I don't see very often and hadn't spoken to in years) didn't even congratulate me, she just said please tell me this is your last one I said NO I'm having about 4 more !!!! lol gee you should have seen the look on her face.


Anyone else keep their ttc a secret, do you get comments about when's the next one, what do you say?

[Amberlilly55]

I have 3 and we aren't telling anyone in the family that we are ttc. Two of our closest friends know and thats all. The family thinks that we are done. They all just assumed that on their own. I'm sure they will think that we are insane.

I'm sorry that you are having such a hard time conceiving. In the mean time snuggle the five little ones that you have been blessed with and I will send lots of baby dust your way! All of my boy dust at that!

[inshaallahxx]

I only have two boys and want to try for a girl. Every one tells me I will just have another boy, so I tell them "Well I'll have another one" I don't mind having four or five kids. But when I tell people that they acted so offended I want a big family.

[Cdbaby84]

People seem to have a problem with people who want big families. I have no idea why. I want to have 4-5 children and I've always wanted them fairly closely spaced. (Add to the fact that DH and I are 31 and 29, we will kind of need to have them closely spaced!)

People feel the need to tell me all the time about how I don't actually want five kids (have since I can remember!) or I don't actually want them closely spaced. (Thanks for telling me what I want!).

The best is people telling me about parenting choices! I want to cloth diaper, breast feed, and not have my kids be hugely attached to electronics. You'd think I was suggesting poison! I live I'm the middle of four hundred acres and I simply want my kids to take advantage of that by playing outside, building forts, going fishing etc.

Why can't people just shut up!!?!

I'm so sorry that this turned into my own rant and I'm terribly sorry that people are being so insensitive to you. If nothing else we have these boards to come to and real life people don't need to know! Hugs and I hope you are feeling better and people stop being so nosey and rude

[inshaallahxx]

No don't say sorry. I relate to you in so many ways. I never wanted more than two kids but lately it just seems so wonderful to have a bigger family. It might be tough but I know I won't regret it. Where as I feel if I don't I will regret it.

I'm about to be 25 and my husband is 26 almost 27.
I have a 9 year old who I had when I was only 15 and my second son who is now almost 4. We are ready for another one. Our future kids will probably be much closer together I want to be done before I'm 33.


Gosh I've never longed for something so bad EVER, only this little girl that hasn't even been conceived yet. lol

[inshaallahxx]

I plan to conceive this fall and don't plan on telling any one when I get pregnant until it's obvious because of all the comments being made.

[My Three Sons]

We only told a few people we were TTC. People just assumed we were done when we had #3. I thought we were done too as DH didn't want to try again, so people will really be shocked! I came from a large family and want this #4 really badly. This is definitely our last though.

I don't know why people care what other people do so much. I think it's crazy when people say they are done after one, but I don't tell them! It's none of my business, it's theirs...

As far as regrets, I know that times will be hard financially with another child, especially paying daycare for the next several years, but that's temporary. I won't worry about that... I would regret never having another though. I could never regret having a child...

[mommymachine]

I strongly dislike how people look at big families like a desease. Then I go to our annual Catholic camping trip and all the families there have a million kids and my heart is so happy. People ask me all the time if I am done, and I always say no. Sometimes I get negative comments but I do get positive ones too. I'm terrified to tell my in-laws I'm pregnant, and I don't plan on telling them until I know gender. And then I'll get the "well is THIS the last one" comments. Probably not, but thanks for caring. Jeesh

[inshaallahxx]

I feel lucky because the only people that have been supportive is my MIL and Mom, Oh and my 1st son's step-mom. They not only tell me that they think I will have DD but also tell me if not to try again.

Every one that I expected to be supportive, like my closest friends, have all been negative.

I guess I know which people will get to share my blessings with me first!

[Princess of Pink]

Only a few very close friends of mine who support me having another baby even know we TTC last year and will be again soon. None of my family know and never will know, to them it will be a little slip up that we are taking as a blessing. I just couldn't handle the opinions that will get forced down my throat (and I will still get them but not as bad).