16 week gender scan

[EmmyRoo]

Hi everyone,
First up apologies for not being on here very often, I've been feeling fluey the last few days, plus my migraines made a reappearance last week and I ended up in A+E getting my medication dosage upped, DH had a sick bug and I keep getting morning sickness on and off (mild but still...) so all in all I've not had the strength to do much but lie around feeling sorry for myself! Hope everyone's ok and bumps are doing well.

The reason for the thread...
I've been given my NT scan date from the hospital which will be when I'm only 11+1. They think I'll be 12+1 then but I ovulated a week late and the midwives go by last period date until your due date is corrected at the NT scan. I don't want to change the date cos I'm finding hiding this pregnancy stressful, especially as I'm getting too big for my trousers already so I do want to have the scan in 2 weeks.
But I started worrying I'll not get a good nub shot that early (will I?), which I was relying on to start the process of getting my head around another boy (it seems inevitable) before the 20 week scan. So, DH said last night that we could have a private gender scan at 16 weeks if I wanted, and the more I thought about it the more I thought it was a good idea.
I thought that we could keep it totally secret, take a day off work together while the boys are at school/childminder and have the scan, have lunch, do some consolatory baby boy shopping then have 4 weeks to come to terms with it being a boy privately, before the 20 week scan. Basically EVERYONE knows we will find out the gender at 20 weeks so the minute we come out of the appointment people will be clamouring to know, which means we're forced to paint on a smile and endure the "3 boys" comments before having any time to absorb the information ourselves. This way, we're OK with it (hopefully) long before anyone else needs to know.

So I looked up the nearest clinic and they only have saturday appointments available. So my question is what do we do with the boys? On one hand it would be lovely for them to see the scan but on the other hand, what if there's something wrong with the baby? What if I react really badly to the gender and cry? What if (very likely) they get bored and disruptive? If we're paying £79 for this scan I want to be able to fully concentrate on it. But getting someone else to look after them means telling someone where we're going, which goes against the point of having the scan in secret. Argh, what do we do?

Also, has anyone got any experience of Babybond in Livingston? Is it worth it?

Thanks and sorry for the long post.
x

[Praying4Pink]

Hi Emmy! Would you be able to tell whoever is watching the kids that you and your hubby want to have a "date day" before the baby comes? That usually works for us, lol. I mean theoretically it will become a date day after the scan. Is it family that will be watching the little guys or a private sitter? Sorry I can't help with the scan part as I decided against getting one (too far).

Oh and Emmy..."Think Pink" love!

[rainbowflower]

if you give the hospital a ring and tell them you're on holiday that week they will reschedule it for a later date - I've done this a couple of times

are there any other private clinics near you? I found I had worse customer service at Babybond (not the one near you) than I did at a different local private scanning place, and that one was cheaper too.

[OneLastDream]

Hi - we had a scan at babybond and took our 3 boys. I managed to stay calm when they confirmed boy no 4 and try to be happy for the boys. The boys were brilliant in there just watching - I didn't concentrate enough though. We went to Maidstone. We haven't told anyone the sex - the boys want to keep it a secret which suits me fine xx good luck for hearing girl xxx

[Bama Belle]

Try to stay positive about getting a baby girl!

[Wanting-a-girl]

I would move your NT scan up to the next week It will be worth the extra little wait to get a good nub... Even if you got a good nub at 11 weeks it is only 50/50 at that point...

I think u will be fine if it's another boy I didn't even blink with my third lol I was happy still and to be honest I have the strongest bond with him out of my three... I have my fingers crossed that you get your girl... I know its hard to think positive I havnt looked at girl names at all but I have. List of boy names lol

[Justjessica]

Hi Emmy, I totally understand your thinking. If you couldn't get a sitter, could you get the scan place to write the gender on a piece of paper after they have checked the baby is all ok and then open it privately with DH when you get home? That's what I'm thinking of doing when I have my 20 week as I can't face crying in front of a sonographer.

[EmmyRoo]

Thanks for all your replies. I would move the 12 week scan date but I'm starting to struggle with hiding this (probably cos I'm eating SO much and have gained a stone in a month!) but I'm just desperate to be able to go public. I think that if we go for the gender scan it doesn't matter so much if we get a nub shot at 11 wks. I keep telling myself that at some point in this process I will HAVE to find out the gender whether I like it or not, I'll have to face up to it. I think your nub situation praying4pink has made me realise that even with all girl guesses you can't relax and feel certain about the gender! Maybe knowing we'll definitely find out at 16 wks will help us be calmer about it, after all, waiting longer to find out won't change the gender....

I think we'll ask my parents up for the weekend to look after the boys for a few hrs+just say we're having a private scan so we can get 3d pics as it's our last baby. We can maybe convince them that you can't see the gender at 16 wks if they ask, so they don't think that's the reason.

Rainbowflower I looked at all the places near us and babybond are the only ones who do gender scanning at 16 wks, everywhere else is 18 wks at the earliest which is so close to the NHS one at 20 wks it hardly seems worth it! I just have to hope their customer service is better than your experience!

Oh I hate how I'm so desperate to find out and yet so terrified, I don't think I've ever felt so torn about anything, I really don't know what I want!

X

[rainbowflower]

Emmy, or just tell your parents that baby had her legs crossed so you couldn't see
I remember feeling that way, it's not a nice limbo to be in, very stressful

[Justjessica]

I know how you feel. It is stressful not knowing but it's kind of exciting too. I figure while I don't know there's still hope so I kind of like this phase too