July Chit Chat for Ladies due in Sept/Oct/Nov

[Hobbermittens]

I know I don't know for sure this babyis a girl, but I just know it is, and the GD is starting to bother me a lot. I wish I didn't have regrets about my sway. That is what is eating me up the most. I really wanted to go into this with nothing hanging over me, but it didn't work out that way. I screwed up my timing/frequency. That's what I regret so much. We didn't DTD enough, and I don't think we DTD on O day (don't know for sure because of wacky temps). I feel like if we had DTD on O day, and had DTD at least one more time in the fertile window, I would feel like I had a better sway. It should have worked out that way, but I think I O'ed early and didn't get enough attempts in.

I should have done what I did to get my son, which was DTD every day for 5 or 6 days in a row, but I was worried that it might be "girl frequency", so I went for every other day instead. I regret that so much now. I wish I hadn't heard of swaying and had just tried on my own. I probably would have had a better chance for a boy if I didn't screw up what worked last time.

I wish I could stop thinking about all of this, but I can't. it is haunting me. This was my last shot, and I didn't do it right. Now I get to live with that for the rest of my life.

[Mochagirl]

Hobber - I'm sorry you're feeling so down. I am completely convinced that timing makes no difference whatsoever. My timing for DS3 and DD were almost identical.

As for frequency, DH and I DTD for 6 days straight when we conceived this little girl, so I don't think that would necessarily have made a difference to your sway either.

You had a good sway, and you still have a great chance of this baby being a boy. I'm constantly sending you heaps of blue dust!

[Hobbermittens]

Thanks, Mocha. It helps to hear about your sway stuff too. Didn't your DH abstain or do FR for your girl sway, though?

I am sorry to be a pain and keep harping on this when I don't even have confirmation of gender! It probably seems ridiculous to everyone. Honestly, though, this kind of "what if" GD is better than what I would be feeling if I knew for sure.

[TTC5]

Big hugs Hobbers x x

[Myloves]

Speaking of good books to read when pregnant, when I was huge with DS1, just days from giving birth to him, I read the book "The Other Boleyn girl" and this is totally mental, I know, but when she is describing how important having a son is to King Henry the 8th, and described all about how important a male heir was, it made me feel a ton better about having a boy! I know that is so crazy, but I had always just wanted girls, and then reading a book where the baby boy was like this long-sought after dream made me feel like royality, lol. It was one of the first things that helped me with perspective on gender issues, since I felt like everyone around me wnated girls too, and since my sisters had had so many sons, having a boy was like adding more boys to an already boy heavy family, so reading the book helped shift my persepctive that some people really value what I was having!

I know what you mean Aurora. It feels good to hear that boys are appreciated, but at the same time it leaves a bad taste in my mouth when I think of how badly daughters were treated in comparison during those days (and nowadays too, in developing countries).

I live in an area where everyone (even my family and friends) want sons. They were super excited for me when I was having my first two, but when dd was born no-one cared as much. I thought the fact that since boys were favored it would help me with my gd, but it didn't. Instead, it really pissed me off actually. In a way, it actually fueled my gd and made me not want boys even more at the time (because I thought any future girl I might have would not favored in the same way).

I just wish both genders were appreciated - with no-one favoring one over the other, not girls or boys kwim?

[Myloves]

Hobbermittens, I was so sure my ds2 was a girl! I even thought his u/s looked girly. But he's all boy! There's no guarantee your LO is a girl yet!

[Mochagirl]

Thanks, Mocha. It helps to hear about your sway stuff too. Didn't your DH abstain or do FR for your girl sway, though?

Yes, we did do fr before we started our attempts, so maybe it is a bit different. But the main point is don't drive yourself crazy second guessing your sway. We all had things about our sway that didn't go perfectly. I was convinced we'd dtd too many times to get a girl, and here I am having one. Think of the things you DID do, not the things you didn't do. I'm really thinking you could have a little boy in there .

[Hobbermittens]

Yes, we did do fr before we started our attempts, so maybe it is a bit different. But the main point is don't drive yourself crazy second guessing your sway. We all had things about our sway that didn't go perfectly. I was convinced we'd dtd too many times to get a girl, and here I am having one. Think of the things you DID do, not the things you didn't do. I'm really thinking you could have a little boy in there .

Oh, yeah, I think FR would make a huge difference.

I did do a lot of stuff. I know. I changed my diet drastically, I did all those supps and drinks, etc. But hindsight is 20/20, you know? The more I think about it, the more I think (for me, anyway) that frequency makes a huge difference. I got both my DDs from one time "oops" BDs, and my son we really tried for and did lots of BDing. I should have paid more attention to that at the time. Because at most we got 3 attempts in, at worst 2 (I will never really know which because I am not sure when I O'ed). I just don't think that was enough.

[pinkin2011]

Hob I only did one attempt and d/h did fr LOTS and look at what I am having! With ds1 we dtd like everyday for the month!! so both mine were concieved with way different patterns

[HappyLea]

Well my DS3 and this one were complete opposite patterns and both boys. DS3 was abstain with one attempt with about 4/5 day cut off. And this one was frequent with lots of attempts with splime and of course all the supps and creams etc but he is all boy also.

DS2 is my clingy boy, he isnt so lcingy in the house but if i go shopping he is the one that wants to come with me. If they all go to nannies house next door, he is the one to say 'i want to go home to mummy'.