Ladies due in Sept/Oct/Nov 2012, gather here!

[sallygal]

Yes, I'm already obsessing over gender. It doesn't help that almost my entire former due date group who swayed pink have gotten their girls: Zanacal, Doulamama, Inglewood (TWIN girls!), etc. As they're happily shopping for pink I still have months before I can be put out of my misery.

I know the waiting really sucks hey!! I am just sooo nervous and am worried I will be a mess when I hear boy again. Some days I think I'll be fine and I know all that matters is health. My last pregnancy was really crappy though and I know if I have another like that I will find it hard to go again. If it is a girl I know this will be it, but if it's a boy we would go one last time. I also am not sure whether it is better to wait til the end to find out because once the little boy is here you are not going to be upset but when I found out was ds2 was I struggled for a while and then just felt so guilty for feeling like that.
I told my sis that I'm preg and the first thing she said was 'oh what if you have another boy?' What are you meant to say to that? That is why I kinda enjoy keeping it to ourselves as much as possible cos I know I will get loads of those comments when the news is out. AHHHH, all we can do is hope and cross our fingers hey! I'm just worried now that I should have done the LE better and not taken calc and mag!!!

[Jamie86]

Mocha, that must be so hard, I'm really sorry.

Surprisingly I haven't been obsessing over gender too much but I do feel a little anxious to get to the date when I can find out. No one but my mother and sister even knows how badly we are hoping for a girl even though everyone definitely assumes after 2 boys. DH and I always talk about names early and now DH has been doing exactly what he did with DS1. When I was pregnant with DS1 he wanted a boy so badly and would only entertain boys names before we found out, with DS2 we discussed both boy and girl names equally and now DH will only discuss girl names.

[sallygal]

Hi Jamie, Ohh I wish I wasn't obsessing yet. A lot of the time I actually forget I am pg, and the boys keep me busy most of the time. It's just when things get quiet... so must keep myself busy!

[Mochagirl]

I told my sis that I'm preg and the first thing she said was 'oh what if you have another boy?' What are you meant to say to that? That is why I kinda enjoy keeping it to ourselves as much as possible cos I know I will get loads of those comments when the news is out.

Yeah, I get comments like that all the time. My brothers are always teasing me that I'll never make anything but boys. One of the reasons I don't want anyone but my closest pals and Mom to know about the pregnancy in the early days is to avoid those sorts of comments. My plan is to wait until I know the gender for sure, and announce the pregnancy and the gender at the same time so I won't hear that kind of stuff. I hope no one close to me would dare make those sorts of comments if they know I'm having my 4th boy.

And as for finding out gender...with my twins we didn't find out. I was CONVINCED they were girls - I'd even bought pink stuff. When they were born, and they announced 'It's a boy!', my heart fell, and instead of feeling jubilant that I had a healthy, gorgeous little guy, I spent those precious first few minutes with him wishing he was a girl. I'll always regret that.

With ds3, who I swayed for IG-style, I decided to find out the gender. When I found out he was a boy, I cried for 3 days, then slowly recovered. By the time he was born, I was excited to meet him, and it was a far more positive experience. For that reason, I'm going to find out the gender this time too.

[Jamie86]

I think perhaps it's because I've never experienced gender disappointment before and as of now I think I'll be ok either way (not that I won't be disappointed) but I am a little scared that it will affect me more than I think. Actually when DH and I got married we both said we wanted to have 2 boys and then a girl and then from there anything else would be great. With DS1 we both desperately wanted a boy and going into the ultrasound to find out I was so nervous and when they said boy it was such a relief. With DS2 everyone around me was saying he was a girl and I did get a little excited about that but then one night in the bath I just knew he was a boy and was not surprised or upset at all when it was confirmed by ultrasound.

Is anyone else going to do the early ultrasound to find out or are you ladies waiting until 20 weeks? With both DSs I went to a local place and paid to have one done at 15 weeks, if they can't determine you can go back for free. Although I am thinking about waiting a little longer this time because if they say girl at 15 weeks I probably won't trust it as much as I trusted them saying boy because I know it's easier to mistake girl for boy than boy for girl.

[sallygal]

Yeah I think we will find out again also... didn't with ds1 but did with ds2. We told ppl we didn't know though and still say we didn't know because we knew pppl would assume we would find out again. Once you have found out it is easier to I think... but I will be sooo nervous on that day!

How you feeling Mocha? I have been so bloated today but have also eaten way more than usual. It's like when I get pregnant my brain thinks it is ok to eat what I want!!! I usually watch what I eat pretty well and keep my weight down but being pg it all goes out the window. I was better with ds2 and i swore I would be even better next time... only 4 weeks and already buggered up!! Ahh will start fresh tomorrow!! Other than that have had a bit of very dull af type pains and maybe a bit more tired but mums are always tired hey!

[sallygal]

I think perhaps it's because I've never experienced gender disappointment before and as of now I think I'll be ok either way (not that I won't be disappointed) but I am a little scared that it will affect me more than I think. Actually when DH and I got married we both said we wanted to have 2 boys and then a girl and then from there anything else would be great. With DS1 we both desperately wanted a boy and going into the ultrasound to find out I was so nervous and when they said boy it was such a relief. With DS2 everyone around me was saying he was a girl and I did get a little excited about that but then one night in the bath I just knew he was a boy and was not surprised or upset at all when it was confirmed by ultrasound.

Is anyone else going to do the early ultrasound to find out or are you ladies waiting until 20 weeks? With both DSs I went to a local place and paid to have one done at 15 weeks, if they can't determine you can go back for free. Although I am thinking about waiting a little longer this time because if they say girl at 15 weeks I probably won't trust it as much as I trusted them saying boy because I know it's easier to mistake girl for boy than boy for girl.

Yeah I am also thinking of doing an earlier one... was thinking 16 weeks and hopefully they can tell. I did that intelligender urine test with ds2- crap. So wrong! I think it made it worse at the u/s when they said boy cos it convinced me that he was a girl. We didn't sway with him, cept half hearted shettles attempt.

[Jamie86]

I am so bloated as well. I am also so upset about my weight I had been doing really low carb trying to lose weight and by low carb I mean no grains, fruit, starches or things of the sort at all (I was eating no rice, pasta, potatoes, bread, fruit and nothing like yogurt either). While doing this I also usually went off my diet (on purpose not counting the days I just messed up) once a week and usually had some "bad days" every month as well (where I attempted to diet but just not sucessfully). Well I decided to focus more on healthy whole eating and have been eating balanced meals and adding some yogurt, fruit, and some grains and starches back as well. I have also been journaling when/what I eat, I have gone over on calories some days but more often than not I stay to my plan. I have been working out (prenatal Pilates) most days as well. I actually have been doing much better since getting pregnant because even though I was "dieting" I had been having a really hard time sticking to anything (I think it's because I was attempting to be so restrictive). My last 2 pregnancies the minute I found out I was pregnant I threw everything out of the window and I gained a little over 30lbs each pregnancy and usually most in the first trimester but usually later in the 1st trimester when I get really sick so at this point I hadn't gained anything. Well I have already gained 5lbs and I am just so discouraged I cried on the scales last night and then got angry this morning when I weighed again thinking maybe it was some sort of water weight fluke last night. I just want to scream and I can't help but think why can't I just be a normal person why must such a large portion of my life be about food and yet I'm still overweight. With the amount I weigh most people probably think I eat junk and fast food on a regular basis (nope that's my 125lb husband) and know nothing about nutrition. I rarely eat fast food and even when I have eaten fast food I cannot even remember the last time I had a hamburger and fries I usually try to look for something a little more reasonable (grilled chicken sandwich with only half the bun). I'm not going to lie and say I don't like cake, ice cream, fries, bread etc etc because I do but I do not eat those things often at all. I also have met with several nutritionist, taken nutrition classes in college and actually know quite a lot about the way our bodies function and use food but I just can't make it work for me.

I'm so sorry for the rant ladies I just got off of the scale and I'm still pretty upset about it.

[sallygal]

Oh Jamie... I am so sorry you feel that way! Try not to be too hard on yourself now though as you are pg and baby's health is most important. Have you ever had your thyroid tested? An underactive or overactive (one of the two?!) can cause weight gain hey?
For me I feel like it's not so much what I eat but how much. Portion size is the key I find... guessing you know all that though after seeing a nutritionist.
Just continue eating whole foods and your pilates and try to enjoy being pregnant. I will try to take my own advice too!!

[auroara78]

I am definitely already obsessing about gender, but it creeps up on me...I'll think about some sweet soft lavender or deep purple and imagine a baby girl in it...I'll be taking a shower and daydreaming about what our daughter might look like...then I have to snap myself out of it, and think, OK this baby could be a boy, so....?

I am just worried that my daydreaming constantly about lovely soft girly things is going to hurt me if I hear boy, but at the same time, it is fun to have that hope and that dream for now. I'm not really stressing about it, just worried that my fantasies won't come true.

Yesterday driving to work I had a vision of being on the U/S table, hearing "it's a girl" and feeling such relief. I was so happy my eyes started tearing up....I need to get a grip, but hey, it's the pregnancy hormones...

Jamie, I am also like you: overweight but I eat pretty healthy. I never get fast food, etc. My problem was lack of excerise (though I ate well) and well, my post C-sectioned x2 body needs excerise. I also gained weight just from changing to a stand on my feet all day job to a desk job, which really killed my metabolism. But yeah, my mom always ask me, "what do you eat???" I say "Mom it's not what i eat, its that i dont' excerise much."

I don't have a doctor to berate me about my weight, I got my Mom, 2 sisters and 1 brother...BLEH. Even my dad who is so quiet he doesn't say anything usually has looked my body over in a critical type way. So it sucks I definitely feel your pain.

My husband asked me again last night "So what if we are having twins?" I said, "enough with that conversation already!" SHEESH! hehehe