Dh says NO babies

[bec2483]

I hate feeling sad about not being able to try for that little boy that my heart longs for I can't understand why he Said no and I feel that it's to much of a hot topic to being up and talk about it and of cause I don't want to push him to go get the snip. I see all these lovely people with there new little boys and can't help but feel gutted and sad for myself does any feel this way to ((

[rainbowflower]

have you asked him why it's not an option at all? what did he say, if so?

[4girlswantingaboy]

I know how you must feel my dh is the same

[thehappypixi]

That sucks
I may end up with four of a kind too! We have agreed to four, I can't imagine my DH would go for five either. I know that longing pain.

[bec2483]

I just hope the pain goes way and the reason he has given me is because he just doesn't want anymore. I have been having these ugly thought in my mind to start the he diet and vitamins and then start using condoms and put tiny pin hole in them

[thehappypixi]

I can understand that is a tempting idea! Accidents do happen, even to the most careful, but it's dangerous territory to deceive your husband like that. All I'd say is if you did plan to do that, delete any mention of it anywhere on the web! If he ever found out....

[rainbowflower]

I hope you can talk to him about it and see if there's any chance of compromise before this eats you up inside.

hole in the condom method would sway pink for you (due to low count and spermicide)

[Lassie1982]

Hope you can talk him round.
Let him know how important it is to you, find out what his concerns are, and work through them with him, give it time, sometimes these things take time.
But I would certainly advice against tricking him.
It's morally and ethically wrong on so many levels. And to do something so dishonest to the person you are supposed to love the most in the world?
He might never find out about - but that doesn't make it ok. And if he does? Or has his suspicions, then that's your marriage potentially all but over.
Of course he would most likely love the child, but that doesn't make it ok either.
Just because he is a man and you have the ability to deceive him because of the way biology works, it doesn't make it ok to rob him of the right to decide wether he wants to be a parent again.

Your consumed with desire at the moment, but don't let that cloud your judgement, don't let that turn you into something your not. Look at your husband as the man you decided to spend the rest of your life with, for better or for worse, and if you have even an ounce of respect and love for him then you'll see that you can't actually go through with doing this to him. Marriage isn't a one way street, please don't turn it into one.

Maybe see a counsellor, either by yourself, or together. It can't hurt, and there is a good chance it might help. This is something you need to work through together, and agree on mutually.
You CAN work through this. He needs to know how strongly you feel about, and you need to understand why he feels so strongly the way he does.
I wish you every luck and genuinely hope you can work through it.

[Lassie1982]

I hope you can talk to him about it and see if there's any chance of compromise before this eats you up inside.

hole in the condom method would sway pink for you (due to low count and spermicide)

This is a very valid point, even if you did manage to get pregnant, it's going to be a strong pink sway.

[Yuzu]

Don't give up hope.

When I was pregnant with DS4 a few months ago I told my DH I wanted to try for a girl and he said, and I quote, "I think you need therapy." It was the meanest thing he's ever said to me, and he never says mean things to me. He usually lets me have my way in everything! He insisted he didn't want anymore children. I was so upset with him and I told him to never speak to me that way again. He apologized, but we didn't talk about it again.

So imagine my surprise when DS4 was just a few hours old; I was still in the hospital and DH was holding him. DH said, "So. You want another one, huh? Well, maybe that's a good idea." He totally surprised me! I guess when he was holding his new son he got flooded with emotion. So we're planning on a fifth! People change their minds.