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March 15th, 2013, 03:00 PM #1
Getting ready for Tuesday - big scan
As many of you know that I have swayed blue and really hoping for my sway to work. I know that I will have some GD if it is not blue but I think I will handle it better than I think I will. My family wants this baby to be a boy much more than I do and the pressure is to make everybody happy. But I have convinced myself in last week that I love girls and if I end up being girl’s mommy….that would be fun too. There will be temporary disappointment among some family members, which I totally understand…because this is their last chance to have a grandson (we have all girls in hubby's family) . But I am sure everybody will get over that feeling and love my new little girl.
My fear is that I will not handle the news right way and cry…. and make other people sad too. Can you ladies please help me on how did you handle the gender desire situation with family members. Did you have a family with strong desire?
For now I am praying for healthy baby and boy is a plus.Last edited by prayforaboy; March 15th, 2013 at 03:05 PM.
2009, 2013
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March 15th, 2013, 03:10 PM #2
Hey prayforaboy,
Good luck on your upcoming scan, hope baby is healthy and you hear blue!
Our family had a strong desire for a girl as did DH and I, this is our last baby, the way I decided to deal with it since I knew I'd be a little upset and I knew our families would be too is I actually moved my gender scan ahead a week last minute and we didn't tell anyone we were going. I had about a week to process it myself with just DH and decide how we would tell everyone and deal with their responses etc. I realize that isn't really an option for you since your scan is Tuesday but I hope someone else has a good idea or that you hear boy anyway Good luck again!June 21 2011 - Ryder
May 22 2013 - Hudson
Our family is now complete - no more babies for us. We didn't get our girl but I wouldn't trade my boys for the world, so in love.
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March 15th, 2013, 04:35 PM #3IVF Advice Coach
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I agree with not telling family and change your appointment. It's awful when everyone is waiting with baited breath for the results. I always let it sit with me until I was ready. It didn't make it all better but eased the pressure of THE day.
Mom to
and my IVF/PGD
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March 15th, 2013, 04:59 PM #4
I guess i have already told everybody about Tuesday....may be I can lie that baby did not cooperate? I hope baby does cooperate But you are right I need time to let it sink first.
2009, 2013
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March 15th, 2013, 05:09 PM #5
I know how you feel! It would be so much easier if we didnt have the pressure from friends and family. I honestly dont think I would even care if I didnt have to listen to everyone talk about how we only have girls and there are only granddaughters in the family yada yada yada..like its a bad thing! I think the lying about the scan date is a great idea and I plan to do it also, even if only a couple days difference at least it will give DH and I time for it to sink in and be ok with it before having to listen to all the coments we will be sure to get!
With both of my girls my DH wanted boys! I was so mad after my scan with DD2 cuz there was so much pressure on me to have a boy that I felt liked I failed when the results came in as a girl. I was sad after the scan but only cuz everyone else was disapointed and to this day I still am so mad at myself for feeling that way. I tell DH all the time that I cant believe how great having two DDs is and who wouldve thought! Not his parents that make it such a big deal that they have 6 granddaughters yet see them twice a month even though they live a block away! At the end of the day we are the ones that raise the children and will love them no matter what so why do we let others put that pressure on us? I dont know and Im trying to sort that out myself. Sorry for the ramble, I do know that having two DDs is wonderful in every way and although I would love to know a son I dont feel like my days are any less complete or enjoyable without one. I refuse to be sad this time if I hear girl because they are so great and I cant believe I ever did anything but celebrate them now that they are here! I really dont want to make that mistake again
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March 18th, 2013, 09:19 AM #6
Prayforaboy - I've also got our gender scan tomorrow (hoping for pink!).
I'm sort of wondering if we're doing the right thing finding out, I guess the fear of not hearing what we want to hear.
Fingers crossed for you!
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March 18th, 2013, 09:34 AM #7
Good luck Tuesday. I agree with everyone family puts so much pressure on us even if they aren't doing it intentionally. In the end it doesn't matter what they want because we are the ones raising the children. My whole family wanted me to have a boy since its all girls in the family, but they wouldn't dare say anything to me like that because I think they are afraid to face my wrath! Lol
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March 18th, 2013, 01:30 PM #8
Thank you ladies.....
4Griffins - you reminded me a great thing - when I found out with my DD that it is a girl ( i wanted a boy to get this family pressure off and enjoy my second pregnancy without gender pressure) I had mild gender disappointment but once she was born..... it was a different story... I love her to pieces and I have never loved anybody that much ... so i regret feeling sad during ultrasound. It was all waste of precious emotions. Less than 24 hours remaining for me to find out.............. I had two dreams tonight - one I got an email it is a boy and another someone pointing towards me saying one girl and one boy is good. Keeping my fingers crossed.2009, 2013
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March 18th, 2013, 01:34 PM #9Moderator
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Good luck tomorrow!!!!
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March 19th, 2013, 10:55 AM #10
Pray - how did you gt on?
I'm expecting blue again. Feel quite sad today (and also guilty for the inevitable sadness). Hope you've heard blue too xx
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