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October 22nd, 2013, 05:22 PM #1Dream Newbie
Gender Disappointment at 13 Weeks - Am I crazy?
Hi ladies,
I'm new to this group, but I need some help. Last Thursday, I had my NT scan. I was 12 weeks, 5 days. The tech and the perinatologist guessed boy, 70%, by a potty shot. This is my fourth baby and I have NEVER had a doctor or tech guess this early. ESPECIALLY from a potty shot. I have wanted a girl SO BADLY - DH and I did everything we could to increase our odds of having a girl. Diet, timing, positions - every frickin' wives tale out there damn it! (sorry) This entire time I have thought it was a girl. I have been TERRIBLY sick every single day, which only happened with my first, which was a girl. My two after were boys and I was never sick, not once.
I know this may seem like denial and just gender disappointment speaking, but I can't help but feel it may be wrong. They didn't check the angle of the dangle, and I only got a BRIEF look at it and it looked parallel to the spine to me. I could be wrong - obviously I am no tech. But the tech I saw two weeks before said the only way to really guess at this stage is by the angle of the dangle, because ALL babies have a dangle. Everything happened so fast, I didn't have a chance to ask questions or get any clarification. Has this ever happened to you? Were you told boy at 13 weeks and it turned out to be a girl? Or am I just in denial and need to find a way to get over my gender disappointment?
I appreciate non-judgmental comments please. I already feel badly enough about my disappointment. Thanks in advance ladies.
Tiffany
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October 22nd, 2013, 05:31 PM #2
Don't feel disappointed, we've all been there!! for a potty shot at 12 weeks all babies look the same! you need a nub shot at that gestation. For a potty shot id say 14/15 weeks is the earliest for any accuracy! don't give up hope, it may well be a girl, good luck x
Cycle one, Genesis Feb 2013, 2xx BFN :-(
Cycle two, Genesis June 2013, 3xx BFN :-(
Cycle three, Genesis May 2014, 2xx 7dpt BFP!! 1st Beta 11dpt 405.7 :-) 2nd Beta 15dpt 2304. 6wks 6days 1 Heartbeat seen!!!
12 week scan shows a beautiful baby, very happy!!!!!
20 week scan all perfect and it really is a GIRL!!!
Our little daughter is finally here, safe and sound x
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October 22nd, 2013, 05:44 PM #3IVF Advice Coach
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We have an entire site dedicated to people tgat feel like you. No judgement here. 13 weeks is too early for any certainty though.
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October 22nd, 2013, 05:45 PM #4Dream Newbie
Petal - Thank you for your kind words. I guess I am just going so crazy right now because I never imagined it would be another boy. Which is so silly of me because obviously it's a 50/50 shot! I just feel like it's too early for a shot like that! I asked the doc and she said it's pretty obvious at this point, but I really don't feel like it is!
Danny and Tiffany Est. 2007
Mikayla 2007 Aidan 2009 Ronan 2012
2011 @ 16 Weeks
Expecting 4/2012 PRAYING for
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October 22nd, 2013, 06:23 PM #5Big Dreamer
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October 22nd, 2013, 10:24 PM #6Big Dreamer
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My friend got a potty shot at 13 weeks and I think 4 days, that turned out to be accurate. But I think 12 weeks would be too early. There's many great guessers here that could tell you, if you have a picture.
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk - now Free
[2] healthy baby boy born in 2011
[21 weeks] Nov. 2012 Went for a scan at 20 weeks, baby measured 17+6, came back for a follow up scan and baby had passed away. Lots of testing, no answers.
Moving on without my son's brother. Starting our HT journey in 2014.
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October 23rd, 2013, 12:01 PM #7Dream Newbie
I can't tell you how happy I am that I found this site. It has been so reassuring to find other women who feel the way I do about gender disappointment. SO MANY women keep this subject silent because they feel its taboo and makes them a bad parent. That they should say all they want is a healthy baby - which EVERY MOTHER DOES. That goes without being said. But healthy baby and wanting a specific gender are two very different things, and wanting one does not cancel out the other. I wish more women felt comfortable talking about it. Again, thank you so much for your insight!
Danny and Tiffany Est. 2007
Mikayla 2007 Aidan 2009 Ronan 2012
2011 @ 16 Weeks
Expecting 4/2012 PRAYING for
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October 23rd, 2013, 12:20 PM #8
I was disappointed when we found out ds3 was a boy, really disappointed, I went through weeks and weeks of crying and upset, even wished I hadn't bothered trying for a 3rd, but as the weeks went on I started to feel a connection, and the more people that said 'oh I hope its a girl for you' (I didn't tell anyone I knew the sex) the more angry I got, like they'd be gutted for me it was a boy, so I felt like it was me and my little boy against them all lol. When he was born I felt this instant surge of love, more so than my first 2 boys, our bond was so strong and still is 2 years on. He's my little buddy and I love him more than life, you will too I promise :-) x
Cycle one, Genesis Feb 2013, 2xx BFN :-(
Cycle two, Genesis June 2013, 3xx BFN :-(
Cycle three, Genesis May 2014, 2xx 7dpt BFP!! 1st Beta 11dpt 405.7 :-) 2nd Beta 15dpt 2304. 6wks 6days 1 Heartbeat seen!!!
12 week scan shows a beautiful baby, very happy!!!!!
20 week scan all perfect and it really is a GIRL!!!
Our little daughter is finally here, safe and sound x
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October 23rd, 2013, 05:00 PM #9
I think 13 weeks is too early to know for sure with a potty shot but the angle of the dangle was accurate for both my boys. I know you wrote the dangle was parallel to the spine but does this mean pointing up toward the face or down? Both of my boys had a dangle that was clearly pointing up. Good luck, I hope you hear pink!
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October 23rd, 2013, 10:32 PM #10Dream Newbie
trifecta- I do agree - I feel like looking from a potty shot is too early at 13 weeks. She didn't print me any pictures - no potty shot, no angle of the dangle. She didn't even LOOK at the angle of the dangle. When she was measuring the length of the baby, my husband and I were looking for it and we feel that it didn't angle up at all. We feel it was pretty straight forward. But we could be wrong. She didn't spend any time on it and we are not experts by any means. I have an elective ultrasound scheduled for Nov 7th. I will be 16 weeks so we should have our answer then. HOPEFULLY!
Danny and Tiffany Est. 2007
Mikayla 2007 Aidan 2009 Ronan 2012
2011 @ 16 Weeks
Expecting 4/2012 PRAYING for
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