She feels lshe feels like kicking out all the windows and setting fire to this life

[Magical22]

2 boys 1 girl is my dream, but will I get my girl!!??? I wish I could afford gender IVF in the USA!!

Yet I feel like I can't complain as my sister can't have any kids after years of unsuccessful ivf. This is where I come to vent as venting to her would be cruel.


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[atomic sagebrush]

There's always someone who has things worse than we do - the way I think of it is, if you hit your thumb with a hammer, it still hurts like H--- even though you may logically know that there are people who have thumb cancer or have no thumbs.

[1+2+3boys]

Precisely! Everyones pain is real for them. I always tried to imagine that someone with a broken leg shouldn't tell someone with a broken toe that their pain is not valid. (A girl in my PE class in 4th form broke her second to big toe and ended up in a wheel chair!)
Still as long as we are sensitive to those who are having it hard to have kids (which I am sure we all are). My Sis may be in that boat one day as she has bad PCOS and looks like Mum did too and she had to adopt me to have her first child.

2 boys and one girl was always my dream too Magical 22. I found some of my journels/diary's from my teen years and I was reading one when I was 14 and there were pictures of a boy and then boy/girl twins all at different ages together and thinking back I remember it being my 'future' family! Amazing huh, I was so close too getting the twins but identical ones have to be the same gender of coarse. I had my hoped for children when I still was a child myself!

[LacePrincess]

2 boys 1 girl is my dream, but will I get my girl!!??? I wish I could afford gender IVF in the USA!!

Yet I feel like I can't complain as my sister can't have any kids after years of unsuccessful ivf. This is where I come to vent as venting to her would be cruel.


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I agree with the previous posts - pain is pain, and there are no 'pain Olympics' (I think Atomic said that one!)

But at the same time, there's the concept of tact. I wouldn't go onto an infertility board and bitch about my lot in life, for example! So, know your audience.

My best girlfriend has been ttc for 3 years and has done 4 iui's (one of which succeeded but devastatingly ended in a m/c at 17 weeks). But she's been amazing in supporting me through my journey, and me on hers. Still I have to be very very careful not to rant on about my life when she's in a particularly bad place with her journey. You just have to be sensitive and aware, and tread carefully.

I once saw a GD post on an infertility/IVF board, and just cringed. I completely understood that poster's motivations and commiserated, but it was SO the wrong audience for her post!! Needless to say she got torn apart on the thread.

I find compassion and sensitivity goes a long way, and being mindful of things you say and to who you're saying it to. That's not to invalidate anyone's individual circumstances at all, but being extra tactful is never a bad thing.