Anyone Disappointment about having Girls??

[NYFamilyOfFiveRoses]

I'm dissapointed in having girls. My 3rd girl is on the way and I'm devastated, lost, crushed, confused, you name it.
I'm about to have family make up from my nightmares -3 girls. My ideal family always was 3 boys.

I feel this way a lot too. It did get a lot better being dd3 is almost 2 years old now. I also have 3 girls. For #2 I wanted a boy so bad. Even for #1 I wanted a boy. I am at the point now that I am getting more used to 3 girls but I can never be a Mom to 4 girls.

[bluedreams]

I guess my GD probably seems less legitimate since I do have one son, but believe me, I hurt as deeply as anyone. I was a wreck when I found out DC3 was a girl. My son has been asking for a brother for years, and so far he's gotten one baby sister and probably another on the way. I worry about him being surrounded by girls and feeling left out all his childhood. It breaks my heart that I probably can't give him what he wants so badly--a brother. My daughter got a sister that she asked for, so why can't my son have what he wants, too?

It would be nice to have 2 girls and 2 boys so each of your kids will have someone to bond with. That's a pretty ideal family. But you still have hope since you don't know the sex of your baby. I hope you get another son.

[Waiting4Daisy]

I'm the eldest of GGB! I get the impression my mum really wanted a boy so that they didn't try again until she was in a place they would be happy with either. My dad was also the youngest of GGB. My mum claims my brother was a Shettles success, although two of my 3 boys are Shettles opposites so I'm not convinced by the theory.

I always wanted boys and girls. I would love more boys if I could have a girl. I think most people want both and that if you have all of one gender people assume you want an opposite. Which I guess I can understand.

I really hope you get your boy. Help yourself to my blue dust x

[TinyA]

I've only ever wanted girls actually. I'm currently 13 weeks pregnant with my 2nd baby (my first is a girl) and I am hoping this will be a girl too. I have NO idea why I feel like this and I know I'll love any baby that comes. My nightmare would have been having all boys - I just never have seem myself as a mum of boys.

[auroara78]

I didn't see myself as a mom of boys either until I had two of them...they make my world though and are so funny and handsome! I think all the time how lucky I am to raise them so one day they will (hopefully) be good and loving husbands.

I am very grateful that I will have the chance to raise a daughter as well.

[atomic sagebrush]

I personally feel the most sympathy for people who had a strong gender pref. from their first, and either didn't get any of their DG, or got a mixed bag and would have preferred not to. I mean, yeah I had 4 boys which in some people's minds might mean I "deserve" to have GD more than a person on their 1st or 2nd, but at least with the first two I was happy to hear "it's a boy" and got to experience pregnancy unimpeded by GD at all. Some people never get that feeling - and as I'm sure everyone would agree, sometimes even getting your DG after GD takes the sparkle off of it somehow, so even when the dream comes true, it's still not like a dream-come-true, KWIM??

GD is about not achieving the dream of the family that you thought you'd have and that dream was different for every one of us. Some people want only girls or only boys or they want siblings for one gender and not the other and they have legitimate and logical reasons for wanting that. It's not about having both genders for a lot of people.

[Hobbermittens]

I personally feel the most sympathy for people who had a strong gender pref. from their first, and either didn't get any of their DG, or got a mixed bag and would have preferred not to. I mean, yeah I had 4 boys which in some people's minds might mean I "deserve" to have GD more than a person on their 1st or 2nd, but at least with the first two I was happy to hear "it's a boy" and got to experience pregnancy unimpeded by GD at all. Some people never get that feeling - and as I'm sure everyone would agree, sometimes even getting your DG after GD takes the sparkle off of it somehow, so even when the dream comes true, it's still not like a dream-come-true, KWIM??

GD is about not achieving the dream of the family that you thought you'd have and that dream was different for every one of us. Some people want only girls or only boys or they want siblings for one gender and not the other and they have legitimate and logical reasons for wanting that. It's not about having both genders for a lot of people.

I couldn't agree more.

[Myloves]

GD is about not achieving the dream of the family that you thought you'd have and that dream was different for every one of us. Some people want only girls or only boys or they want siblings for one gender and not the other and they have legitimate and logical reasons for wanting that. It's not about having both genders for a lot of people.

Beautifully said Atomic.

[WantALittleBlue]

I grew up in a family of 3 girls and although my parents never made us feel unwanted or showed any GD it was something we encountered all the time.... Oh wow 3 girls, your poor father! I bet you were trying for a son-
Even though I was young these things stayed with me and I believe that is where my desire for a son stemmed from, feeling inadequate as a child because I was a girl and people feeling sorry for us because of our family make up, I felt bad for my parents that we were all girls, these are things that a child should not have to think about or carry with them because at that age you don't understand why being a girl is so terrible.
I try and think about this when I feel bad and let GD take over me because I have 2DD, my 2nd child is a boy but nevertheless GD was back with DD2, I always wanted only boys. I never want my daughters to feel the way I felt because I was a girl, it doesn't change my GD completely but on most days it makes it better.

On a brighter note, the other day at a birthday party someone asked my DH how many kids he has and he said he has 2DD and 1DS, and the man told him "wow, you are so lucky to have 2 daughters" he himself had BBG. This little comment brightened my day,(DH doesn't care for gender he just always wanted a mix) YES I am lucky to have these wonderful, beautiful, healthy girls, they didn't get to choose me but I chose to have them.
Sorry for the rant I don't even now if I made much sense but at the end of the day there is somebody out there that wishes they had what we have and vice versa.

[sugarNspice]

I've only ever wanted a same-gender family. I didn't have a strong gender preference at all with DD#1, and in fact I think I felt disappointment at first when the ultrasound showed that she was a girl. I am not very "girly" at all--as a kid I liked playing outdoors and climbing trees and soccer. I dropped out of Brownies the week that we were all supposed to try on makeup (I wanted to be in girl scouts to learn to build campfires and tie knots and use a compass). I did have Barbies, and I did play with them, but more often I played race cars and my best friend when I was little was a boy.

But with DD#2, I had a pretty strong girl preference, b/c I really wanted DD1 to have a sister.
DH comes from an all-boy family, really loved growing up that way, and feels very close to his brothers. He'd wished for another girl so that DD1 could have the same kind of experience. And I was an only and always wished for a sibling, though not necessarily a sister. But I do think that same-sex siblings and same-sex families can sometimes have closer bonds than mixed gender families.

Now that we are TTC #3, my gender preference (for another girl) is even stronger. Part of the reason is that my two girls get along well, fight very little, and really enjoy each other's company. I'd love for DD2 to get to have the experience of having a little sister than DD1 has had. But another part of the reason is that I'd never want my daughters to feel that we kept trying for #3 in the hopes of having a boy, that having them (or having girls in general) was not enough for us.

I am (I think) in the process of having my fourth miscarriage... In some ways I think the sadness and disappointment of losing a pregnancy may be very much like GD--in both cases it's about losing a dream of how you wanted your family to be, and losing a baby that you'd never met, held, or even fully imagined, but that you nonetheless knew you would have loved with all of your heart. Whether it's an early pregnancy, or it's the idea of the son/daughter you'd always wanted, the loss is still very real.

The thought that my daughters will (probably) have four siblings they will never get to meet fills me with so much sadness, but it does not diminish my wish for an all-same-gender family in the slightest.