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  1. #1
    Swaying Advice Coach
    atomic sagebrush's Avatar
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    Dec 2010
    Eastern Washington State, USA
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    please be kind to those who are having opposites.

    Hey, over the past couple days I have repeatedly seen some behavior I can only interpret as rude to a person who just found out they are having an opposite. Please do not do this. Do not pepper them with questions about their sway. They are not here to make sure your sway works out by answering your every question. If you have a gender swaying question, address it to ME and I will answer it. Do not add more unhappiness onto a person who is already struggling for your own benefit. There is nothing they can tell you that will guarantee your sway works and all you are doing is being (pardon my french) a dickweed so you can feel better about your sway.

    And above all else, do not EVER tell someone who has just heard they are having an opposite that they are lucky because they already had a girl. Gender disappointment is very complicated and we have people all the time who have just as strong, if not stronger GD because they really want to give their daughter a sister, or lots of other reasons and their desire is just as valid as anyone else's.

    We deal with people from all around the world here and sometimes we have language/cultural differences that make innocent statements be perceived as coming off as rude or insensitive. It is very likely that this is one of those times and this is not personal, I am not angry at anyone, but I do not want anyone to feel unsupported or badgered right when they need the most support.

    Before you post to someone, ask yourself this: "If I was sitting where they are right now, would I ~really~ want to hear this?" And if the answer is no, if you realize "hmm that might hurt my feelings" then don't post it.
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  2. #2
    ksmom's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2013
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    Amen! We're all here because we have some degree of GD and we should be supportive of one another, successful sway or not.
    '15 '15 '16
    🌈 '17 (LE sway opposite)

    Dreaming of pink through HT or adoption
    FET January 2021: 1 HBAA XX - BFN
    FET #2 August 2022: 1 HBAA XX - BFP!

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