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  1. #1
    Big Dreamer

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    you cant carry a baby of that gender question???

    okay i read the article

    http://genderdreaming.com/forum/scie...by-gender.html

    but my question is this, I just(as in today had a d&c) and it was my 5th m/c, my ob offered chromosome something or other testing(because I have had 5 m/cs), I asked him that this might be a stupid question but is it possible to not be able to carry a certain gender, and he said yes but more common in not being able to carry boys and we can test for that, and I said but I have 4 boys and he said oh well its still possible just not as common and we can test you for that too, but my question is how would that make sense for me? I have 2 sisters(meaning my mom had 3 girls and one son) my mom has never experienced a m/c, my grandma on moms side has 2 girls(and one son) never a m/c, my grandma on dads side has 4 girls(2 sons) and never a m/c(her daughters(my aunts) had daughters no m/c), I thought if you got the very rare disease then you can see a pattern in your family, MY family has more girls than boys so how could I got a defective x chromosome? now my other question is could my husband have a defective x chromosome? because all boys run on his side of the family, his mother(my mil) has had 5 pregnancies, 3 boys and 2m/c, one sex was unknown and the other was a girl, both dhs uncle has all boys not sure on m/c though and grandpa on his dad side had all boys(unsure on m/cs) and dhs mom(my mil) side has more boys and very few girls, so I am sure we have covered this a million times on here, hopefully this test wont cost to much and I can get it done, but questions are is it possible for me to have a that disease where I cant carry girls even though I have lots of sisters and my family has lots of girls? or is it possible that maybe dh has the defective x chromosome? he said that on some I can be treated before pregnancy to prevent anymore m/c if we find out with those tests, thanks for your patience ladies and opinions on this
    Last edited by XXdreaming; January 5th, 2012 at 05:28 PM.
    Married for 20yrs, SAHM to 7 healthy boys and one surprise daughter(2021)

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  2. #2
    Dream Vet
    Princess of Pink's Avatar
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    I often wonder that too having had 5 losses. I have no idea how it all works though?
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  3. #3
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    XXdreaming, I'm so sorry about your loss! Lots of hugs!
    Last edited by applesoup; January 5th, 2012 at 07:19 PM.

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  4. #4
    IVF Advice Coach
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    First, I'm sorry. 5 miscarriages puts you in an infertility arena and I would seek help from a doctor. I would recommend you speak with Dr Sher from SRIM- he does FREE consults for prospective IVF patients. I know you may not have the finances nor inclination to pursue IVF, but you can certainly go over your history with him and he specializes in tough cases like yours. I think he would help tremendously and you can tell him the owner of Gender Dreaming sent you.

    I know what you are asking about can be an issue for carrying boys. I am not aware of a single issue for why someone cannot carry a female though.

    My non-medical assumption is that you have an undiagnosed immunologic implantation dysfunction. Something is wrong- 5 miscarriages is too many and you need some testing done. At this point, I don't think you can assume that the outcome will be any different until you figure out what the problem is.

    I know these were not a result of IVF but the same issue apply- IVF Authority: Immunologic Implantation Dysfunction (IID): A common Cause of Repeated, "Unexplained" IVF Failure

    Either it is a chromosome problem or you have something working against you and the embryo that is making your body fight it off. I encourage you to seek medical help before you try again. Please let me know if I can help.
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  5. #5
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    ~XXdreaming have you ever had a blood transfusion? My girlfriend had one at age 12 and she has had 8 MCs in her life and born 3 girls, her issue was with JK antibodies causing hemolytic disease of the fetus, which lead to MC 8 out of 11 pregnancies.

    I think you and your partner need to have further testing done to find out the cause of your MCs.

  6. #6
    Big Dreamer

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    I have never had a blood transfusion, I forgot to clarify that my 5 m/cs aren't in a row which signifies problems but not major ones, I have 2 boys, then 2 m/cs, then 3rd son and one m/c and then 4th son and then 2 m/c, my boys pregnancies were healthy, no bleedings no complications, my 1st three m/c only made it to 6wks(no confirmed hb), then the one in aug 2011 went to 7wks with confirmed heartbeat(at 6wks) but m/ced and bout time I made it in u/s showed nothing it was already gone(at 7wks), this last one was a missed m/c, hb was confirmed at 7wks, then had u/s at 10wks which showed a 7wk 6day baby with no hb, and since I had all pregnancy symptoms with cervix closed and no bleeding or spotting and blood work showed dropping hcg I went with d&c to get it over with and make pregnancy symptoms to go away faster, my ob said that insurance will cover one and maybe 2 tests so I am going to do those and then go from there, since my m/c were scattered throughout 4 healthy pregnancies he says he isn't worried about me not being able to have another and I shouldn't need fertility help, honestly I don't know lol, my regular high risk ob and deals with infertility was out of town still and I will ask him more questions since he is qualified to answer those question for me and not the one that did the d&c,

    So that sounds confusing lol it was

    Ds1
    Ds2
    M/c 6wks no u/s no confirmed hb but confirmed blood test
    M/c 6wks same as above(no u/s etc)
    Ds3
    M/c 6wks same as above(no u/s etc..)
    Ds4
    M/c confirmed hb at 6wks but m/c fast was gone on 7wk u/s
    M/c confirmed hb at 7wks but 10wk u/s showed 7wks 6day baby with no hb(my 1st missed m/c and 1st d&c)

    All u/s was vaginal ones with high tech u/s (which can also do 3d/4d u/s too) with a 20+yrs specializes in pregnancy u/s tech, that works at my ob office
    Last edited by XXdreaming; January 5th, 2012 at 09:44 PM.
    Married for 20yrs, SAHM to 7 healthy boys and one surprise daughter(2021)

    Sometimes God's plan is different than what you had in mind, but His plan is always better and He might surprise you later

  7. #7
    Big Dreamer

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    AOh I forgot to say I have been tested for that autoimmune disorder(the one where my body fights the baby) the lupus? One and I think there's one more, but my dr has ran those test and they are normal, right now I am going to let my dr do all he can then when he is finished and its out of his league he will refer me, but was just curious what y'all thought on here, did anyone get tested for chromosome abnormalities? And I found out that I can be a carrier of a defective x chromosome which isn't a big deal because the x sperm is enough too have a healthy girl that will also be a carrier of the defective x chromosome, but on rare occasions the male can have a defective x chromosome and my defective one and his defected one won't work but I read that is very very rare because normally(not all male) have something off with them if they have defective x chromosome, so correct me if I am wrong or if I misunderstood,

    And atomic I would love your 2 cents when you get a chance
    Married for 20yrs, SAHM to 7 healthy boys and one surprise daughter(2021)

    Sometimes God's plan is different than what you had in mind, but His plan is always better and He might surprise you later

  8. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by XXdreaming View Post
    okay i read the article

    http://genderdreaming.com/forum/scie...by-gender.html

    but my question is this, I just(as in today had a d&c) and it was my 5th m/c, my ob offered chromosome something or other testing(because I have had 5 m/cs), I asked him that this might be a stupid question but is it possible to not be able to carry a certain gender, and he said yes but more common in not being able to carry boys and we can test for that, and I said but I have 4 boys and he said oh well its still possible just not as common and we can test you for that too, but my question is how would that make sense for me? I have 2 sisters(meaning my mom had 3 girls and one son) my mom has never experienced a m/c, my grandma on moms side has 2 girls(and one son) never a m/c, my grandma on dads side has 4 girls(2 sons) and never a m/c(her daughters(my aunts) had daughters no m/c), I thought if you got the very rare disease then you can see a pattern in your family, MY family has more girls than boys so how could I got a defective x chromosome? now my other question is could my husband have a defective x chromosome? because all boys run on his side of the family, his mother(my mil) has had 5 pregnancies, 3 boys and 2m/c, one sex was unknown and the other was a girl, both dhs uncle has all boys not sure on m/c though and grandpa on his dad side had all boys(unsure on m/cs) and dhs mom(my mil) side has more boys and very few girls, so I am sure we have covered this a million times on here, hopefully this test wont cost to much and I can get it done, but questions are is it possible for me to have a that disease where I cant carry girls even though I have lots of sisters and my family has lots of girls? or is it possible that maybe dh has the defective x chromosome? he said that on some I can be treated before pregnancy to prevent anymore m/c if we find out with those tests, thanks for your patience ladies and opinions on this
    It doesn't make that much sense really and I think he was just talking before he really thought it out.

    It is possible but only if both you and your husband carry genes for the exact same X-linked disorder. This will almost always be glaringly obvious because your husband will have a chromosomal disease - they are almost always extremely severe and if his family is boy heavy, it is as close to impossible as you can get because SOMEBODY in his family would have to have manifested the disorder. That you have 4 healthy boys makes it even more impossible. For this to be the case, not only would your husband have managed to survive a serious health condition unscathed and without any symptoms, but ALL your XX losses managed to get bad X's both times, which would be unlikely because in that scenario to have one good X and one bad one and chance would dictate at least one of your XX would have your good X chromosome.

    The odds of that happening are slim to none - but if you're saying that your family is more girl heavy, it is a distant possibility, but a very very unlikely one. I think your doctor was just trying to be helpful and cover all the bases (which is a good trait in a doctor and I don't mean to criticize him) but please do not despair over this - I think it's more likely that the sun will not come up this morning than that you are a carrier of one of these rare conditions.

    The way it works is, you are made of XX and your husband is made of XY cells (obviously ). Since your husband has only ONE X chromosome, if his X chromosome was a bad one, he would have some chromosomal abnormality or disease and usually X-linked disorders are very obvious and serious - no missing it. That he comes from a boy-heavy family without a history of mysterious early deaths and repeated miscarriages, makes it even MORE unlikely that his X is bad.

    You, on the other hand, being made of XX cells, have a "spare" X as all women do. So if you have a bad X, your other X chromosome simply steps up and takes over. In order for you to have a son with a dangerous X-linked condition, if you are a carrier, your four sons would have had to have gotten lucky and received your good X because your husband gives them a Y and they have no backup X. This is a possibility given your history of mc and that you come from a more girl-heavy family, and I DO think your doctor is smart to check just to be on the safe side. But that does NOT MEAN that the babies you miscarried were girls, in fact it is much more likely that they would be boys in that circumstance.

    For one of your daughters to have any of these X-linked genetic problem, BOTH you and your husband would have to carry the exact same bad X chromosome. So she could have a combo of two different options - your "imaginary" bad X with your husband's imaginary bad X would yield a daugher with a genetic condition OR your good X (which you almost surely have one, because your sons are normal and healthy with only ONE of your X's and plus you do not have a genetic disorder) with your husband's imaginary bad X would give you a healthy baby girl (because your good X would take over.) Remember tho, if we are talking about a condition SO severe that it is causing you to miscarry, your husband has ONLY one X and his X would be just as bad as the babies that you would have lost in this circumstance and he would not have been able to survive or would have been born very sick.

    With 5 mc, it's always a good idea just to be tested to rule things out, but if these losses were due to an X-linked condition, it's much more likely that your losses are boys too. Hope this helps, please feel free to ask because it's a confusing thing to try and explain.
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  9. #9
    Swaying Advice Coach
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    Quote Originally Posted by Princess of Pink View Post
    I often wonder that too having had 5 losses. I have no idea how it all works though?
    POP I do think you def. need to be tested because of your history. Even if only for your daughter's sakes, because the odds would be that if you are a carrier of an X-linked disorder, at least one of them probably is as well and it would be a good thing to know for her medical history.

    Any woman with all daughters and a history of repeated losses NEEDS to be tested IMHO.
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  10. #10
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    XX, I would still have the tests that were covered by insurance for your own peace of mind. I'm more concerned that your losses could have been males and that you might have an X-linked disorder, and you would still want to know about that! I agree that since the losses were nonconsecutive that's a good sign for immunological/clotting disorders BUT you could still def. be having a prob. with X-linked chromosomal anomaly causing you to miscarry half your sons - that manifests more as a flip of the coin rather than consecutive losses.

    Have you ever had thyroid checked? That can contribute to mc as well.
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