How soon did you go HT?

[deaks66]

What kind of HT are you guys doing? Last year I had 4 under 4 (all boys) - now I have 4 ages 1-5. It is pretty hectic.
Is the only type of HT available PGD? I recently called a place in our area that boasted they did M/S but when I called they said it didn't get FDA approval so it is no longer available.

fourunderfour, is it still manageable having 4 such little ones? Mine would be 4 under 6 if HT miraculously worked first time. Would i feel like i am drowning?

[jils04]

My dd is nearly 3 so started ht when she was just over 1. I felt I had to give her my attention and bf etc.. before I focussed on another bub. Basically felt bad. glad I did as it took over 2 yrs and 4 cycles to get DS !

[fourunderfour]

in all honesty "drowning" was what I felt the first few months our twins were born. but there was 2 of them.
My husband and I joked all the time about how easy having 1 would be. our big boys get along outstandingly well and would play together all day (except naptime). i can remember vividly as I sat down to nurse the twins I'd say a prayer that the boys wouldn't kill themselves or each other. "please no blood - or at least until I'm done here!" haha
we had a lot of support with our church and they met our situation as best they could with open arms (to take the big boys for a few hours some mornings and providing meals).
things seem super normal now. it feels like just yesterday the twins came home (at that time we had an 18 month old and a 4 yr old), but then again, it feels like forever.
our oldest (now 5) doesn't nap, so that's something i've had to get used to (no nap for mommy and having him around me all the time)...but with that, because he is older and is an excellent tattletale - he enjoys hanging out with the babies in the playroom or outside while i watch from a safe distance (like now while enjoying surfing the web.)
if you and your DH are mentally prepared (i was, hubs was not) for the chaos that can come about when a new child (any new child/dren) come home, then I say go for it!
what doesn't kill you makes you stronger!
"For I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength! Phil 4:13"
plus how much fun will camping trips be when they are all at the age to enjoy it!
can't wait!

fourunderfour, is it still manageable having 4 such little ones? Mine would be 4 under 6 if HT miraculously worked first time. Would i feel like i am drowning?

[deaks66]

if you and your DH are mentally prepared (i was, hubs was not) for the chaos that can come about when a new child (any new child/dren) come home, then I say go for it!
what doesn't kill you makes you stronger!
"For I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength! Phil 4:13"
plus how much fun will camping trips be when they are all at the age to enjoy it!
can't wait!

Ha yes, i think i probably would be mentally prepared, dh not so! But like you say while there are downsides when they are young, the benefits when they are older are great too... i love the idea of doing holidays where they are all enjoying themselves bcos they are of a similar age. Well we will see! If ds3 is an easy-ish baby and i feel it wont be taking anything away from him, if dh still agrees and if i feel prepared for the emotional rollercoaster then im pretty sure we will go for it next summer

[seven gorgeous babies]

I never found out gender of ds 5 before birth, and knew when he was days old it would have to be hi tech.

I remember starting all me research when he was 9 days. But I knew nothing and thought it would take months to work out how it all worked.

I can remember saying to dh that I ideally wanted a 2.5 yr gap BUT as hi tech was not likely to work first time I wanted to start ASAP!

My baby was 9 months old when I first cycled. And then 14 months for 2nd cycle at hrc.
And it was easier with him this young as he had sky cot and slept most of the way.

My final cycle he was 20 months old and we had a villa in Cyprus which he loved- he had so much room he just pottered round all day

And in the end I got my perfect 2.5 yr gap!

Funny how before I started it all I 'knew' deep down that I'd have that gap and twin girls!!!

The other thing was age. I had ds5 days before I was 35, so knew to get a few good cycles in it needed to be sooner rather than later!

[deaks66]

fivegorgeousbabies, thanks for your reply! Definitely thinking of starting sooner rather than later as i want to keep the age difference between dc1 and dc4 as small as possible and thinking it might take several attempts, whats the point in waiting! Amazing how you knew about the gap and twin thing! I always knew i would have three boys

[gizmo77]

im almost done with pregnancy #3 another girl. i find myself trying to convince myself that its ok to have 3 girls but i just cant shake it. i ve always wanted 4 kids (2b2g) but no wid be happy wth just ONE boy. so theres no way id sway again being that i felt i swayed hard core and it still didnt work. for me the only answer is pgd/ivf. unless i just keeping pumping the babies out endlessly till i get one. but id liek to stop at 4.
my first hurdle is to convince DH for a 4th (he is KINDA there i THINK)
2nd hurdle is to convince him to do IVF/PGD (he thinks the baby will come out strange with all the scientifici manipulation and that its "not right.")
3rd hurdle is to tell him how much it costs! and that it may not happen in one cycle!!!

ive found some clinics close to where i live. ive narrowed it down to 2. i think ill consult behind dh's back when #3 is around 6mos..depending on how i feel at the time. then maybe do prestesting after the baby is 12 mos. i DO want to enjoy the baby..i like the baby stage (not the 12-24 mos stage).and i do plan to breastfeed for 12mos.
i dont mind any age gap between kids..im stressed already but i run a tight enough scheduled ship (so far) to allow myself some mommy (and mommy/daddy) time. but i also want to see if i can handle 3 kids! and i have to show dh that i can!!! im already getting overly stressed with the 2 (they are 20 mos apart. and #2 and #3 will be 2yrs and 5 mos apart). but i also am turning 35 a couple weeks BEFORE i deliver. so i feel pressured to start for #4 right away. DH would have preferred larger gaps i think..but we got married and had kids late (starting 30).
i still wnat a boy..esply after i come on here...so im trying not to come on here as much!!!
for the sake of my dh!!
god luck to everyone!

ps where do you UK'ers go (what state) to get IVF/PGD done?? curious.

[deaks66]

Gizmo, reading your post was very similar to my story. Swayed hard for a year but still didn't work. I turn 33 this year so although still got some time, am worried that if I need multiple attempts at pgd, that I wont be getting any younger. My dh is ok with idea of pgd though not ideal for him, the money we can pretty much get together, I cant breast feed anyway so there are many factors indicating we coukd move forward quite quickly. But like you I need to know how I will cope with 3 first I guess. I too keep a tight ship and I get plenty of mummy time though not much with my dh as he works rediculously long hrs. But the logistics of getting ds1 to school, ds2 to preschool, having ds3 and being pregnant (not to mention my dog) freaks me out a little!

As far as clinics go in America, it seems to me that most uk-ers go to HRC but it is also a toss-up between US and Europe clinics such as genesis. I am keen to try HRC first and then try genesis if that fails but I can see the benefits of not travelling to the US as it makes for a very expensive trip. Hmmm.

I too find that sometimes coming on here makes my gd worse but other days I find it good therapy, plus I'm learning loads about pgd